


Obsession

by adreenalee75



Category: Trouble in the Heights (2011)
Genre: An eye for an eye, Best Friends, Chance Meetings, Coming of Age, Domestic Violence, Drugs, F/M, First Meetings, Gangs, Infatuation, Kidnapping, Mob Bosses, Murder, Passion, Past/present relationship, Reunions, Room Number 4, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Second Chances, Street festivals, Surprises, Taken, The People Worth Dying For, True Love, Unplanned Pregnancy, Violence, together again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-01-09 02:20:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 32
Words: 48,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12266916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adreenalee75/pseuds/adreenalee75
Summary: Nevada meets a girl that stirs emotions in him he finds hard to control. There is something about her he just can't resist.An immediate infatuation, a hopeless attraction, and a love that spans decades.





	1. -The Past, Where It All Began...

**Author's Note:**

> The first chapters take place in the past when Nevada was young and first meets Martyna. The story continues to progress to the present. Translations via Google Translate, I apologize in advance for any mistakes.  
> I would also like to add that this is not your typical Nevada story/plot. If you're looking for that, skip this. If you're looking for a different twist, this story is for you :)

 

 

 

When Nevada saw her his heart warmed and a smile crossed his face. From where he was standing by the bridge, he could see the auburn highlights in her wavy, brown hair shinning when the sun moved over her. Her smile made his stomach flutter. ’Who's this?’ Nevada rubbed his chin thoughtfully, trying to place her face. There had been so many women… had he seen her before? After some thought he concluded he hadn’t seen her around, and he knew damn near everyone.

 

 

She was different then then the girls he saw around his turf; sportier, kinda carefree he thought - not glittery and made up in tight clothes with perfect hair. This girl was quite the opposite, which made him question his instant attraction to her. She had a certain aura about her he was drawn too, a lightness in the way she moved that brought him back to his childhood. A few cherished memories he buried so deep he’d almost forgotten them. ‘Mujer hermosa’ Nevada thought licking his lips. ‘How beautiful she will look lying across my sheets’ He licked his lips, adjusting himself roughly through his jeans.

 

 

Nevada watched her for a long time, running the length of the make shift soccer field across from the tracks. Stealing the ball from the other team with ease and laughing when she tripped. One of her teammates helped her up, brushing off the grass from her knees. Nevada’s guts tightened and his hands went to his hips. He wasn't jealous of some idiota he'd never met. The feeling was briefly acknowledged, but dismissed almost as quick as it came.

 

 

He wanted to know who this girl was. It was clear she wasn’t from the neighborhood, so where the fuck did she come from? Nevada became _very_ aware of the sudden intensity he felt to know all about her, and it baffled him. Why did he care, some random girl he’d never met... Why the fuck _did_ he care? ‘Why should I give a shit?’ he thought ‘There are women everywhere’ But he couldn’t shake it. He had to find out.

 

 

Sighing, he lit his last cigarette, turning his face to the sky and exhaling. The sun felt good on him. He knew these warm fall days would be coming to an end soon, and it would be in his best interest to tie up any loose ends from the deals made in the summer. Fall and winter were always the hard seasons for business.It was hard to get people motivated without a little ‘intervention’ in the winter months. He snickered at the thought and squashed his cigarette under his foot. Walking back to the Fleetwood, he turned once more to the field where the soccer game was being played.

 

 

He'd tell Marco to find out who this girl was. No one new walks around the Heights without him knowing about it. _Especially_ a woman. Nevada would deal with this belleza after the festival. Besides, the festival was a tradition Nevada and his men had always enjoyed and looked forward to. Stroll in, get shit faced, leave with whoever and fuck her behind the pavilion. And he was not planning on missing it.

 

 

Getting into the car, Nevada’s phone rang in his pocket. It was Alex saying the shipment had arrived and the Kaczynski’s were waiting for him at the docks. ‘Their early’ He thought. Navada didn’t like surprises. He didn’t like when people who were known for being chronically late to drop off's, changed their routine. A feeling of uneasiness grew in the pit of his stomach and he sighed, rubbing his temples.

 

 

_Fuck_

 

 

“The docks” He motioned to Peter. “Drive. If any of those wastes of skin start fuckin around, you know where the bullets go.”

 

 

“Yes Boss” The men answered as they pulled out into the traffic of the New York streets.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 Nevada's crew pulled up and parked in their usual spot by the front door of Cellie's Delicatessen. Everyone knew that was _his_ spot, and left plenty of room for him to park his new, enormous Fleetwood cadillac. He relished in the looks strangers gave him when he pulled up to the curb. Everyone knew _he_ was coming and would act accordingly; keep your head down or walk away quickly. He liked that.

 

 

 By the time the back door was opened for him, he realized how tired he was. Going on a mere three hours of sleep, he felt dizzy. And the delivery episode at the docks drained what little energy he was holding onto. He knew full well something was off, even though nothing exciting had happened, he felt it in his guts - and his guts were never wrong. Nevada stretched his arms and cracked his neck, rubbing a sore spot at the back. A yawn escaped him as he popped a cigarette in his mouth, taking a long drag before signaling his men to follow him into the crowded festival with a wave of his hand.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fleetwood: Popular cadillac of the 1990's


	2. Chapter 2

 

The streets were full of life and the live music pumped through the crowds like ripples on the water. People were lining up to try the latest beer and food creations from the vendors who lined the streets by the hundreds. People were dancing and laughing, spilling their drinks and stumbling in drunken hysterics. The streets of New York were alive.

 

Girls dressed in tiny outfits, dancing with their friends and grinding into whoever past by; Girls in jeans and sweaters, laughing with each other over who got fucked out of the most cash playing dice by the fry stand. Shy girls off to the side of the street looking a little afraid and sipping their beer slowly while watching the activity pass them by…Nevada loved all the girls. And this year there was a very nice selection if he did say so himself.

 

He loved this time of year. He loved the streets in the fall. There was always something going on and always an opportunity for new business. He had done well for himself he thought, sipping his beer and taking in the scenery. He learned the business from his Papi, taught him everything he knew before the bullets put him to sleep for good. At this point in his career, Nevada had surpassed his father’s revenue and control over most of the boroughs. Of course, the consensus of the more seasoned bosses remained the same.

 

He was too young.

 

"Twenty four and heading the family business!? On straci wszystko! ( _He’ll lose everything_!) The only thing a 24-year-old is thinking is how to get his dick nice and wet”

 

“He’ll be too busy fuckin’ to keep the house afloat. Et cela pourrait nous baiser tous a long terme. ( _And that could fuck us all in the long run_ ) Not good.”

 

“Come on who the fuck gonna take the kid seriously? Non ti preoccuparti di quello!!” ( _Do not worry about that_!)

 

And it went on.

 

‘But all those fuckers learned’ he thought smirking ‘No one fucks with Trujillo’

 

And no one did.

 

Not after Nevada and his men ransacked a rival gang’s warehouse for setting up on their territory. They stabbed, shot and sliced anything that moved, leaving a river of blood and bits of flesh on the concrete. By the time it was called in, the stink of decaying corps was so strong it had leaked to the outside. When the cops opened the doors, the overwhelming odor caused many to vomit right there while others couldn’t even step foot inside. It was a gruesome sight. The rats had fed on the bodies leaving holes and rips on the faces, some were even missing eyeballs. The boss of the rival gangs head was found stuck onto a broom handle leaning up against an open and empty safe door. Nevada took back the money they stole from him after decapitating their boss.

 

‘No one steals from me. Ever.’

 

And no one since then had.

 

 

* * *

 

 

He was pulled back to the festivities when someone fell into him, hard, knocking the beer out of his hand and sending him tumbling sideways. Nevada regained his footing and his men were by his side in seconds. “¿Qué mierda estás haciendo perra!” ( _What the fuck are you doing bitch!)_ He waved his hand signaling his men to stand down. He straightened his black hoodie and smoothed his jeans over, wiping off the beer with his hand’s. The girl who fell into Nevada was clueless as to _whom_ she had just knocked over. She quickly pushed herself up off the pavement, not bothering to acknowledge the man in black behind her - wanting to kill her for her for spilling his drink on his expensive jeans.

 

Turning to the guys who had pushed her over, she stood yelling at them, calling them every name in the book. She swung her arms and hands in the air, cursing them over what they did to some girl. The boys just stood there, listening to the string of obscenities she spat at them. They finally snapped out of their drunken stupor when it hit home just what this girl was on about, attracting quite an audience in doing so. Almost in unison, they stepped toward her, lips pursed and fists clenched.

 

 

Nevada knew all to well the look the boys were giving her. Rage fuled by humiliation coursed through their veins and they wouldn’t hesitate to give her their fists in front of the audience she had acquired to save face. The boy on the right pushed her and she went flying back into Nevada’s men, knocking Marco and Peter over into each other. Their beer and hotdogs smushed into the others clothing.

 

 

 

‘“Fuckin’ cunt what did you say to me?!”

 

The girl stood up and spat at his feet. “Go fuck yourself you bastard! You sick fuck- I know what you did…You think your money can save you huh? You can get away with it! You slimy prick! Rot in hell!”

 

‘She’s got some balls’ Nevada thought. He wondered how tough she’d feel after they kicked the shit out of her.

 

The boy on the right grabbed her arms and pushed them down, wrapping his larger ones around her frame so she couldn’t move. The other one who had pushed her came at her with his fist. She shifted, going limp and slumping to the ground while the boy swung, punching his friend in the ribs accidentally. Now out of his grip, she turned and kicked him in the face. Then ducked a swing from the other boy and curled her arm upwards, hitting him clean in the ball’s. The spectator’s flinched, simultaneously letting out an ‘ooohhhhhh shit’.

 

The boy went down like a sack of potato’s, whining loudly and gripping his member. Curled into the fetal position, he was helpless to aid his friend to kick the fuck out of this load mouth bitch that was humiliating both of them. The other boy’s hands were covered in blood from his nose that dripped onto his pristine white polo.

 

“You wait bitch, when you’re not lookin,’ I’ll come for you” The boy hissed “And I’ll snap your fuckin’ neck like a twig!” He yelled. The two boys shrugged off in defeat through the crowd. The girl stood there, wiping blood off her small hands onto her dirty tights, watching until they were out of her sight.

 

‘Not bad’ Nevada thought. There was something to be said about a woman who could hold her own. He, personally, didn’t know any. The girls he knew were all to ready to spread their legs for him at the drop of a dime. Different night, different whore. Just like clock work.

 

But this girl just fucked up those two guys just like that, had _them_ running. She took them on for nothing he thought to himself. ‘Why waste the energy?’ He thought ‘Why bother with a couple of rich pendejos?’ There was obviously more to it then he cared to think about. Still, he liked her fire. And given her fistiness, Nevada figured it would be a lot of fun getting her to his bed. He licked his lips imagining her bent over, screaming his name as he thrust himself inside her. Women with that kind of confidence turned him on, he wanted them, he craved them, they were a challenge. And he loved a challenge.

 

Nevada thought she looked familiar, but couldn’t tell forsure. Maybe it was that puta from the bar? No he would have remembered her he thought with a smile. Either way Nevada wanted to meet her, ‘get to know her’ he smugly thought. Turning in the direction of the beer tent, Nevada motioned his hand forward, and the men moved into the crowd.

 

“Any of you see that niña, bring her to me.” A nod from his men said they understood his order. The night was young, and the pavilion was calling.

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

“Boss, she’s over there!”

 

Maddy yelled and pointed into the crowd. Nevada’s line of vision immediately zeroed in on her. She was walking up to the vendor selling Polish food, putting her hair in a loose ponytail as she made her way over. He walked up half way to the vendor, standing in the middle of the street, and watched her closely. 'What's she sayin'?' It was to hard to hear with the noise. Nevada watched her take a bite of her food, and then quickly put her hand on her mouth to suppress a laugh and keep from spitting out her meal. He paused and listened to her laugh again, cocking his head to the side. ‘I know that laugh’ He told himself. He couldn’t see all her face from that distance, and strained his neck upwards and to the side trying for a better view over the crowd. Finally, there was a break in the sea of people and he saw her face for the first time.

 

And froze.

 

When she turned fully in Nevada’s direction his jaw dropped and all the blood in his body rushed to his face, making him dizzy. His eyes glassed over and lips parted as he sucked in a deep, shallow breath. His knees were weak and his legs felt heavy. Nevada felt all the tension in his shoulders release at the sight of her and it felt incredible. A warmth pooling under his jeans made him _very_ aware of his aching erection, screaming for contact with her. He was dumbfounded, stunned. Never had he _ever_ had this reaction to a woman he's never met before.

 

His eyes went soft gazing at her, hypnotized by the beauty in front of him. She was beyond gorgeous. He had never seen a purer form of beauty in all his life. Her movements felt so familiar to him - like he had watched them for years. _‘God fucking dammit what the fuck is wrong_ _with me?’_ Frustrated at not being able to control his emotions, his lips curled inward and he clenched his fists. ‘ _Fuck!’_. He knew nothing of this girl but felt he would die for her if she even hinted at it. She was stirring awake parts of him that were long dead, emotions he didn't know he was capable of feeling. Nevada let out a sigh that was filled with a kind of desperation. A bizarre mix of apprehension and butterflies and calm.

 

 

“Boss!... BOSS!” Peter yelled over the music

 

Nevada’s eyes snapped up suddenly, staring angrily at his man for the disturbance.

 

“What do you want carbon!”

 

“The chick from the soccer field, ‘that her!?”

 

“What!”

 

“Soccer game! By the tracks! ‘that her?!”

 

Nevada turned his head in the direction of the girl and slid his sunglasses to the rim of his nose. He stared hard at her, rubbing the stubble on his cheeks. ‘No, her hair was lighter-more red’ he thought. ‘Shinny hair. She had shinny hair, with…’ He stopped. The girl threw her head back and laughed. ‘That laugh, I know that laugh’ He began walking over to her, people parting voluntarily to avoid him like the plague. ‘Soccer girl?’ She laughed again, and this time he was positive. The soccer game by the tracks. This was the girl.

 

‘Holy Shit’.

 

She turned and caught his eye’s on her. Unlike almost everyone, she didn’t look away, just stared back. Running a hand through her hair, she smiled at him. The most delicious, sexy thing he had ever seen. Those feelings Navada tried desperately to squash earlier came flooding back like a tidal wave, making his body tingle from head to foot. ‘Dios mio’ ( _My God) he_ whispered to himself. They stared at each other for a long time, studying one another. The noise around them seemed to disappear.

 

‘Is she coming over here - shit’ Nevada watched as she broke their trace and began moving toward him. Vulnerable. He felt vulnerable. And he hated it. His fingers twitched and his hands faltered around clumsily for the pockets of his jeans. Shoving his hands inside, he wiped his sweaty palms off, changing his stance from left to right. Nevada looked up to see her smiling as she walked over – the most beautiful smile crossed her face as she reached him, giving him goose bumps ran the length of his spine.

 

“Hi” She looked down and kicked a stone “Are you Nevada Ramirez?”

 

“Yes”

 

She pushed herself close to his body, shoving the metal barrel of her tiny gun into his navel.

 

“My name is Martyna Kaczynski. You are to come with me. My father want’s words with you.”

 

_Well shit_


	4. Chapter 4

 

 

Martyna led Nevada through the back service entrance of the restaurant and out through the kitchen doors. Kaczynski sat eating his supper with five large men standing around his private table. The restaurant was empty except for the staff, and Nevada noticed the curtains were drawn and the sign was turned to ‘Closed’. His gun had been confiscated before he arrived and Kaczynski’s thugs found the knife he kept in the pocket of the t-shirt he wore under his hoodie. He made a mental note to go out and buy the most expensive jacket he could find so he could hide shit in the seams. Leather would be good he thought. Black leather.

 

 

“Nevada!” Kaczynski wiped his mouth with the napkin he was using as a bib and stood, waving him over.

 

 

“Nevada…sit, sit” Navada sat down crossing his leg over his knee, memorizing exactly where all the exits were. Kaczynski took him in and let out a hearty laugh before picking up the wine.

 

 

 "No, no, no. You are not here to get the beats my boy, so you can relax. You’ll not need any of those exits tonight. “Wine?"

 

 

“No.” Nevada said with an edge to his voice “What do you want?”

 

 

“I like that. Straight to the point.” Kaczynski motioned for the waitress who quickly cleared the plates, keeping her head down.

 

 

“A little birdie told me those fuckers who peddle dirty whores and bad coke from the Bronx are looking to expand. Now where do you think they are looking to do this hmm?” Kaczynski cooed “That’s right, your quarter. And why do I give a shit? Because business between us has always been good. We have both made a lot of money with our arrangement and I don’t want those cocksuckers fucking with my money train.” He took in Nevada’s white knuckles and gathered what he said hit that spot. Made him angry. Good.

 

 

“Where did you hear this?" Nevada gritted through his teeth “People talk shit all the time trying to get information. They play people…people who think they are untouchable. People like you.” Nevada cocked his head to the side. “Why should I take your word” It wasn’t a question.

 

 

“Because my men on the inside told me so. Because I trust them. You want something more tangible maybe? Something you can touch? My men found documents! Documents!’’ He howled ‘’Can you fuckin believe that?! Ci idioci trzymali papierowy ślad! Głupie skurwysynie!” (Those idiots kept a paper trail! Dumb motherfuckers!) Kaczynski threw his head back and cackled. Nevada wanted to slit his throat with a butter knife.

 

 

‘’Now then” Kaczynski collected himself ‘’This is what I propose...’’

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

It wasn’t a bad plan, Nevada thought. A little cliché but doable for the most part. In a nutshell, Kaczynski’s men would pose as junkies harassing the dealers for a hit. When the exchange was made, Nevada’s men would follow to find where the supply was coming from. Not that black and white, as nothing is, but he got the just of it, and it was simple enough for those half wits that worked for Kaczynski not to fuck up.

 

 

Martyna walked over and stood behind Nevada’s chair, signaling the end of the meeting. He stood up and gave Kaczynski’s hand a long, hard shake. His eyes burrowing into the fat man’s, his glare saying clearly ‘Don’t even think about fucking with me’. Kaczynski smiled, his dinner still stuck in his teeth.

 

 

Martyna walked Nevada out the back-service entrance and took a deep breath of the crisp fall air. She ran fingers over the hood of Navada’s car that had been brought up by one of her father’s men. Just in case things did not go well. But they had. Tonight had gone better then she thought – no one was dead. Bonus.

 

 

She turned to speak but all her words were lost when his hand came up and squeezed her jugular cutting off her supply of air. Both her hands went to her neck trying desperately to scratch and smack his larger ones off. Nevada leaned her over the hood of his car, shaking her. She should have known not to turn her back on him. Martyna’s vison began to blur and her grip loosened. Her bodies movements slowed and she felt herself drifting off. A hard belt to her face jolted her semi-conscious and Nevada’s nose was touching the tip of hers when she came too.

 

 

 

 ¿Así que piensas que puedes jugar conmigo? ¿Crees que tienes protección por tu nombre? ( _So you think you can play with me? Do you think you have protection by your name?)_ Nevada grabbed her face and dug his nails into her cheeks. “Answer me!” His face was millimeters away from hers.

 

 

“No!” She screamed “Get the fuck off me!” Martyna fought against his grip. Nevada put his hand over her mouth to muffle the shouting.

 

 

 “I can break your jaw right now” Nevada whispered in her ear “That pretty little mouth of yours would stay shut.” His face was so close to hers he could smell the food she ate for dinner. She struggled against him still, kicking her legs and punching at his chest. Nevada seized both her hands and pinned them at her sides. He kicked her feet out to put one of his legs between hers to stop the kicking. Martyna laid with her back arched over his car. Arms and legs pinned under him.

 

 

 

 He held her there. Waiting. Nevada watched her movements begin to slow as she grew tired. Her hair was a mess, her lips were swollen from the smack he gave her and her shirt was ripped just enough that he could see the top of her breast. Fuck she was beautiful. He could stare at her forever.

 

 

 

 

“What the hell are you looking at? Fuckin’ dupek. ( _asshole_ ) let me up!”

 

 

 

Martyna laid there, pinned down, staring at him. Her arms began feeling limp against him. His face was so close to hers, he smelled so good – like peppermint and expensive cologne. She hated the feelings stirring in her, loathed the emotions she knew showed on her face.

 

 

“Get off me” She tried to sound strong but it came out like a plea, a whimper almost _‘fuck what is happening!’_ Martyna twisted her hips trying to free her legs, but Nevada wouldn’t move. He just laid there, staring at her. Staring at her with the sexiest most gorgeous eyes she had ever seen on any man. Her stomach fluttered at his touch.

 

 

Nevada let her arms go, wondering if she would hit him, or choke him, or punch him, but she didn’t do any of those things. She looked into his eyes, and he melted. She brought her arms up over her head and crossed her wrists in a kind of unspoken surrender. Martyna slipped her leg out from between his thigh, resting it beside him so he lay between her legs. He put his hands on either side of her, mimicking the vulnerability she was presenting to him. Martyna’s hands moved to his face, slowly caressing his cheeks, his stubble rough on her well manicured fingers. She couldn’t even make herself give a shit that not five minutes ago, this man could have killed her. She couldn't make sense of how, whatever this was becoming, had happened. All she knew was that it felt right - this man felt right.

 

 

She took him in as she touched him. Lips parted, shallow breath and the most intense eyes she had ever seen. Green with flecks of hazel staring down at her with a pleading look he didn’t try to hide. This woman felt like home to him, felt like all the good things you don’t get when you chose the path in life he did. Martyna moved her hands to the back of his neck and pulled him even closer. Her lips gently moving over his open mouth, feeling her middle wet and swollen for him. She nudged her nose against his; her lips gently graced Nevada’s bottom one and made his cock harder then he had ever felt. He ground into her spread legs, and she moaned into his mouth

 

‘ _Take me’_

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

 

They barely made it to the motel on 186th, Just one block away from the restaurant. They couldn’t keep from touching each other. Their mouths exploring one another’s; tongues pushing and licking, making them both moan. The need they felt for each other was almost unbearable. Every touch was electric, sending waves of pleasure over both of them.

 

 

Nevada pushed Martyna through the door of room number 4, their mouths straining for closer contact, tongues and teeth crashing into each other. Martyna’s hand slid to the bulge in his jeans and grabbed him roughly, making him gasp and squeeze her tighter. He licked down her neck, biting and sucking, her moans getting louder as she gave into him. The noises she was making were driving him fucking crazy. He bit her hard and she yelped, desperately trying to pull his clothes off. Nevada picked her up and threw her on the bed. Crawling on top of her, he kissed her hard and pressed his body into her spread legs, grinding her into the mattress. Martyna felt her wetness run down her thighs. She was drenched, soaking through her panties and her tights. “ _Please…_ ” She mewled in his ear “ _Please_ …” She ran her finger nails down his back as he ground his erection into her. He slipped his hand down between her legs and felt how wet she was “ _Fuck_ ” he hissed " _Fuck I have_ _to have you_ ”. Martyna felt his fingers running over her clit and cried out with a desire she had never experienced for any man before. _"I want you"_ She whispered. _"Now"_

 

 

Nevada couldn’t take it anymore, his breath was coming out in heavy grunts that sounded animalistic, primal. Martyna looked into his eyes and there was something so raw there. It scared her, and made her spread her legs wider for him. She wanted him, wanted what was behind his eyes and in him that made him look at her like that. Like an animal. Nevada grabbed her arms and threw her body to the middle of the bed. Roughly removing her hoodie, he pounced on top of her as she fell back. He grabbed her white tank top with both hands and ripped the fabric off her body, scratching her stomach and arm. He tore off her bra and threw it across the room, hungrily attacking her breasts with his teeth. Martyna yelled at the contact, trying to push him off. Navada pinned her arms above her head and started sucking hard on her nipples. Martyna moaned and felt the flood between her legs. “ _I want your mouth on me, your tongue inside me…_ ” she purred. Navada tore off her tights and ripped off her underwear, holding them to his face. Her scent made him drip as he pulled off his jeans and boxers. Martyna licked her lips at the size of him, running a hand across her breasts, squeezing them as her tongue ran across her upper lip. He sank his face in between her open legs and she begged him never to stop.

 

 

Nevada licked and sucked like he was empty, starving for her. He was drawing out all her juices and she was screaming above him. His tongue rammed into her swollen pussy, then three fingers fucked her hard. Her body was shaking and she begged him to stop, and begged him _never_ to stop. The pleasure was too much. Martyna’s hands were on her face, covering her eyes trying to ground herself back to reality. Her back was arched and her legs shook. " _Oh fuck…please…Oh god…"_ She felt the heat raising inside her, the weakness take over her. She was at his mercy and she loved every fucking bit of it. Her legs fell apart even wider and Navada growled " _That’s right, spread your legs for me”_. He looked up at her arched over, scratches on her body from his roughness, moaning and sighing for him. He knew right then he would never let her go. She was his. _Only_ his. _“Fuck I love the way you taste”_ He ran his tongue in one swipe up her wetness and she cried out his name, grasping at the sheets beside her.

 

 

Nevada leaned over her shaking body and grabbed her by the throat, lifting her up to his face and thrust his tongue in her mouth. His hand went from her throat to her clit, rubbing hard. “ _You like the way you_ _taste? You like how my tongue is covered in your juices_? _Your dripping wet for me. All for me. Say it_ ” Martyna tried to open her eyes _"All for_ _you"_   She whispered. He threw her back on the bed, grabbing her legs and flipping her over so she was on all fours. She yelped at the roughness, then begged him to put his cock inside her. Touching herself, she began to shake again and pant loudly. Nevada grabbed both her hands and held them behind her back. She twisted and whimpered at the lack of contact and Nevada rolled one of her nipples with his slick fingers. Martyna couldn’t stand it anymore. “ _Please..oh God…I_ _can’t… please…”_ He caressed her ass with the head of his cock, wiping himself on her soft skin. His breath was heaving, his dick twitched and throbbed and leaked. She looked at him, putting the finger that was just inside her, in her mouth. And smiled. He rammed his thick cock in her and fucked her hard.

 

 

Nevada felt dizzy, he thrust into her and her juices covered his stomach and balls. He yelled and swore and called her name. She was so fucking tight and felt so fucking good around him. Almost instantly, he came, leaning over her ass and panting, telling her how tight she was and how good she was. He was still hard as a rock. He almost couldn’t stop thrusting into her. Martyna screamed and begged for him. Her words made him harder and she melted into the bed while he hammered her from behind, the bruises already showing on her hips and thighs. He was so big and she was so full of him inside her. It was a feeling she had never experienced with any other man, it was pure ecstasy. The pleasure fell over her and she couldn’t even scream, her orgasms left her body limp, to weak to even sigh with the pleasure she was feeling. Another title wave poured over her and she squeezed the sheets and Nevada’s cock. He came for the second time inside her, pounding her so hard and screaming her name before he slumped on top of her back. “ _Jesus Christ_ ” He gasped. He began to soften inside of her, and a feeling of complete satisfaction came over him; Something he had never felt on any level before. It was just like heaven. She was just like heaven.

 

 

He rolled onto his side and wrapped his arms around her body. She was still shaking, and she smiled at him. The most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Martyna kissed the top of his nose and laced her fingers through his. Navada whispered in her ear " _Your mine_.” Martyna liked how that sounded, and nestled into his chest. Neither one of them said it, but both felt it. Both knew their lives would never be the same now that they had found each other. 'Fate is a funny thing' Martyna thought. She drifting off to sleep with Nevada beside her, holding her tightly in his arms.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

 

 

In the months that followed since their first night together in room number four of the modest motel on 186th, Nevada and Martyna had become inseparable. Whatever it was that happened to them that night, neither of them could find the words to describe it. It was like coming home, they were complete. They felt it deep in their souls. It was just too powerful for them not to surrender too.

 

 

Martyna began accompanying Nevada to his business meetings as a colleague, not as his woman. He had never allowed this before, it was unknown territory for him. He was concerned about the message he would be sending to the other bosses, seeing her there as a partner of sorts. But she was very persistent. Martyna reminded him that although she willingly gave herself to him in the bedroom, she would _never_ be owned outside of it, or controlled. And Nevada could not fucking stand it. He _hated_ it, and tried to use his charm to manipulate her from wanting to join the meetings at all.

 

 

“But cariño, don’t you want to go out with your friends tonight? That club is supposed to be one of the best in town…you’ll be board sitting there.” Or “You know you won’t understand what the meeting is about, so why waste your time hmm? How ‘bout you go shopping instead my beauty” It wasn’t a question. “Maybe you can pick out something both of us would like…” This last comment made Martyna’s blood boil and she countered with a picture frame to the side of his head, storming out of his apartment she was slowly becoming a resident at.

 

 

After much negotiating, (mostly on Nevada's part as Martyna wouldn't budge on the issue) they decided she would sit next to him - not on him as the others did. She would do all the things at the meeting that he needed to show his dominance to the bosses. And in turn, she would contribute to the deals without his interference. Her knowledge of gang negotiation her father had taught her became indispensable. Martyna was becoming quite an asset to Nevada’s crew - something that had _not_ gone unnoticed by certain interested parties.

 

 

Martyna was quite gifted at the art of distraction, much to Nevada’s delight. She entirely made a show of insuring he looked domineering to the other leaders. Touching and kissing him, moaning and licking his neck. When her hand moved from his throat slowly downward, the men lounging with their arms over the chairs and legs crossed began shifting in their seats. They paid much more attention to what was going on under the table then they thought showed, but their faces gave them away. Nevada loved that they were distracted enough to manipulate the prices in his favor. When he stood signaling the meeting was over, he purposely tucked himself in while standing and shaking the men’s hands. Just so they would leave remembering the show they got, and not how much they all agreed to now pay. Which, he smiled, was substantially more then originally negotiated for the product hitting the streets the week after next.

 

 

When the men had left the Warehouse, Nevada rushed Martyna, cornering her against the wall and pulling up her dress to slide two fingers inside her. She was already soaked for him, and Nevada was crazy for it. He saw the glistening on her thighs and it took everything he had not to get on his knees and lick them both clean. He stared into her eyes when she began to shake against him, the most gorgeous blue he had ever seen; like the ocean after a storm. She moaned and cried into his mouth and he drank it all in, pushing herself deeper onto his thick fingers. He pulled them out quickly, forcing her down on her knees in front of him. She watched him unbuckle his belt and licked her lips, looking up at him.

 

 

“What do you say my puta…do you want this hard cock?”

 

 

“Yes” Martyna grinned up at him “Give it to me.”

 

 

Nevada grabbed the back of her hair and thrust into her mouth, hitting the back of her throat she was gaging. Tears ran down her flushed cheeks and she tasted him leaking in her mouth. She pulled him out with a pop, running her tongue up the underside of his member then back down, she took his balls into her mouth and sucked in hard. Nevada shouted out her name and started shoving himself closer to her. Martyna tongued the head of his cock, switching between sucking hard and licking him gently. He was gasping and moaning above her, tangling his fingers in her long wavy hair. She finally took him all the way in and sucked fast and hard until she felt his warm seed hit the back of her throat. She swallowed everything he gave her, and kept him in her mouth until he was empty. He pumped a few more times before he relaxed. He gazed down at her when he was done, caressing her face, smiling.

 

 

“What about me?” Martyna pouted, looking up at him with lustful eyes “Is that all you got?”

 

 

Smirking, Nevada pulled her off her knees and kissed her hard. Running his hand past her bra to pull out her breast, he sucked a hickey next to her nipple and she sighed. His fingers rubbed her clit in soft circles and she writhed and moaned for him. She pressed her body closer to his, trying desperately for more contact. Wrapping her legs around his waist he carried her to the table where the meeting took place, and laid her down.

 

 

“Spread your legs.” Martyna submitted and spread them wide open for him. She was already drenched, wanting him like mad to be inside her. Nevada glided in easily and her back arched off the table at the feeling of him. Her head was thrown back, screaming his name, begging for him… Fuck he loved it when she screamed for him, all for him, only him. Her wetness was all over the table and the heat he felt raising up inside him was agonizing. He stared cursing and mumbling between heavy pants. Praying as the sea of pleasure washed over them both. It was indescribable. Martyna sobbed and Nevada yelled into the empty Warehouse when they both came together. Slowly, he brought his hand to her face and tenderly wiped away the small tears. She grabbed his hand and kissed his fingers that now held hers. Martyna loved feeling him so close to her, loved his arms wrapped tightly around her..

 

 

“Come my love” Nevada gently picked Martyna up off the table and stood her up. Her kissed her breast before returning it to her dress, then cupped her face in his hands and kissed her slowly. She held his wrists and returned the passionate kiss. They stayed like this for a long minute, or was it hours... Neither of them knew or cared. All that mattered was right now.

 

 

A sudden noise from the outside caused Nevada to break the kiss and put his hand on his gun. They listened carefully, not moving. The noise was coming from the back-entrance doors, someone was trying to get in, or worse, masses were trying to get in. And by the sound of it, there was more then one and they knew what they were doing. The heavy steel garage doors were secured with chains and large pad locks. The only way to remove them was with construction grade bolt cutters. If they had them, it wouldn’t take long before they came through.

 

 

“Take my phone and lock yourself in the storage room. Call Marco, tell him to come with the men. Do it now!” His voice was low and dangerous.

 

 

“What about you!…come with me, don’t stay here!” It was a loud, scared whisper. Martyna didn’t know what would happen if there truly was more the one with a gun that broke in. She did know that with those odds Nevada’s chances of walking out of here were almost non-existent.

 

 

“Go. _Now_.” He pushed her in the direction of the storage room and she was already calling Marco when the banging became so loud she could barley hear him on the other end.

 

 

“Marco!” Martyna yelled into the receiver “Marco! Their breaking in the Warehouse” Her voice was shaky and desperate. She didn’t even have her god damn gun – why the fuck did she leave it at the apartment! “You have to come now! We are here, Marco can you hear me?!"”

 

 

“Martyna? I can’t hear you! What the fuck is that noise!” Marco strained his voice to a yell “Where’s Nevada?! Where the fuck are you!”

 

 

“Hurry! Nevada's here and they're breaking down the doors! Hurry, please!" Martyna's voice was shrill and horse with fear. "Get your fucking ass down to the Warehouse, bring the men – hurry! Please!”

 

 

“Already in the car, we’re on our way…Can you see Nevada?! Martyna! Are you there?? Martyna!”

 

 

Loud bangs echoed off the walls of the Warehouse and ripped through the receiver of Marco’s phone like butter. Bullets. Those were bullets. He stuck his index finger in his ear to muffle the noise from the men prepping their guns in the back. He held his breath and listened for signs of movement…

 

 

And he listened some more...

 

 

All he heard was silence.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since these chapters of the story are set when Navada is in his 20's (so in the 1990's), texting was just emerging as the "new" form of communication which was very limited. So in the story I stayed true to the time and had the characters make phone calls. I thought I'd add this little tid-bit in case anyone was wondering 'Why not just text?'
> 
> Fun Fact: The first text message ever sent was on December 3rd, 1992 by a 22 year old test engineer from the UK, wishing his friend a Merry Christmas in Newbury :)


	7. Chapter 7

 

 

Marco turned off the lights of the Fleetwood and slowly pulled up the broken concrete road at the back of the warehouse. He wanted to go full tilt, slam on the brakes, jump out and go in guns a blazing. But he knew they had Nevada, or Martyna, or both. Marco also knew that the amount of fire power pointed at their heads would be substantial. Whoever had taken them wouldn’t give a fuck if trigger went off, blowing their brains all over the walls, floors, and each other. He had to be cautious.

 

“What the fuck you doin’ Marc let’s go!” Maddy whispered from the back

 

“No” he snapped “Shut up and listen” Marco, Maddy, Alex and Peter held their breaths and listened. No one moved except to shift their weight off their weapons.

 

“I don’t hear anything…where’s the fuckin back up? No way we got enough muscle for this just here” Peter made a round circle in the air with his index finger, pointing to the men.

 

“Their comin’… God damnit why are their lights still on?!” Everything was a whisper with the intensity of adrenaline behind it. Alex’s head snapped to the approaching car, then gave Maddy a punch in the arm pointing at his phone “Tell those coños to turn off the lights, what are they fuckin’new!?”

 

It was too late. A parade of bullets shot out of the dented and scuffed warehouse doors, penetrating the windshield of the Fleetwood and smashing the glass into tiny little razor blades. The men pulled their guns and spilled from the car through the doors that were now their feeble protection. Round after round was discharged into the warehouse, back and forth like missiles. The sound tore through the air as more of Nevada’s men joined, firing blindly into the darkness. There were to many rounds blown out of the warehouse for them to be using hand-helds, sounded more like semi automatics. The noise was deafening.

 

A bullet whipped by Marco’s ear with a zing. He heard a thud and turned to see Maddy laying on the ground, blood gushing from the entrance wound on his shoulder. Marco dragged him to the back of the car and wrapped his bandana around it. “Push down on this shit, _hard_ \- keep it there” He held it there as he fired. “Get my gun!” Marco grabbed Maddy’s gun and pitched it under the car. He shot three guys rushing them just in time; Marco couldn’t see them from where he was crouched. “Gracias hermano!” ( _Thanks’ brother_ ) Maddy nodded, firing three more slugs toward the warehouse.

 

The shooting stopped suddenly, causing Nevada’s crew to step back, guns still aimed at the garage doors. Alex yelled at the man to hold their fire, no one moved. The tension in the air was as heavy as lead. An insidious quite hung between the darkness of the alley and Nevada’s men. They waited.

 

Silence

 

Marco waved the men closest to the back to move in. When they were in place around the warehouse, the other men maneuvered around the cars, guns pointed in front of them, sideling slowly toward the landing. One by one they entered the building, guns extended in a straight line from the tip of their noses, to the end reach of their arms. They spread out around the inside, kicked in doors and flipped over tables – nothing. ‘What the fuck is going on’ Marco thought. ‘How did they just vanish without us seeing them?’

 

Three taps echoed in the darkness, the code for permission to flip the lights on. Marco tapped once for ‘yes’ and they flickered on. The whole inside looked like swiss cheese with the amount of bullet holes left behind. When the men’s eyes had adjusted to the light, they could see blood pooled in spots under chairs where ropes had been cut loose and left behind. There were splatter patterns on walls and bodies on the ground. Not one belonged to Nevada or Martyna. ‘Gracias a Dios’ ( _Thank God)_ Marco thought ‘Where the hell are they then?’.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Peter opened the door to the large supply room, shimming left and right with his gun pointed in the air in front of him. The only light he had to see with was the dim line made through the crack of the door. He fumbled for the light switch, tripping over a small table he nearly landed face first into the metal crates that were stacked against the wall “God damnit” he cursed. Regaining his footing he side stepped the chairs and shuffled his feet around containers holding God knows what. “Fuck there ain’t nothin’ here”. Peter turned to go back and almost ploughed over Alex.

 

“The fuck you doin”? Alex regained his composure and shot Peter a look. “Find ‘em?”

 

“No man, nothin’. He’s not here, they’re not here, Martyna’s not here…where the fuck did they go? How do you just disappear when not five minutes ago, they were trying to blow our brains out? Makes no sense...makes no fucking sense at all” Peter sighed shaking his head.

 

“Where’s the light switch? - Never mind, I see it” Alex walked around the table on the opposite side to where Peter stood scratching his head. He tried to stretch to reach the lights over a large crate and his fingers just grazed it. He lifted his leg over the one side and hopped to the other side of the crate. Alex lost his footing and fell hard, cracking his head off the dirty concrete. “Fuck!” Peter stumbled through the junk on the floor, straining his arm he reached the switch, flicking it on “Holy Shit!”

 

“Alex! Fuck! Alex can you hear me!” The slick red goo blended into Alex’s figure and Peter grabbed and shook him violently.

 

“Hey get the fuck off me man, ‘course I can hear you…what the hell are you doing?”

 

“I thought it was yours” Peter motioned to the ground around him.

 

Alex looked down at the floor. Thick, crimson fluid puddled around where he slipped. He was covered in it. And it wasn’t his own.

 

The soft sound of dripping from the ceiling echoed in the silence of the storage room and they looked up. The two men followed the loose stream of blood falling downward slowly with their eyes until they cocked their heads back so far, neither could look up anymore. What their eyes found when they reached the top shook them to their cores. Violence had always been part of their lives, part of their jobs, but this…this was some other kind of evil altogether.

 

“Jesus Mary and Joseph…” Alex gasped, crossing himself

 

Above them, Nevada was strung up with meat hooks. His unconscious body hung there, legs and arms spread wide open with the grapnels cutting through his flesh and tearing his skin apart. His body poured blood like a fountain, dripping away his life onto the cold concrete. His face was beaten and swollen to the point where his eyes and cheeks morphed into one obscene shape that was unrecognizable as a man. He dangled from the ceiling like a statue in a church, waiting to be taken to Heaven.

 

_Exactly_ what they wanted.

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

When they finally pulled Nevada’s body down with the chain falls and yanked the hooks out of his flesh, he was grey from blood loss.. Marco put a shattered piece of glass under his nose to see if he was still breathing – the slightest of breaths marked the dirty shard. The men gently rolled him on his side and Maddy placed two fingers on the side of tis neck to check for a pulse. At first he couldn’t find it, and ran his fingers all over Nevada’s throat as panic set in with the men circled around him. They began shifting nervously looking at one another then dropping their stare to the ground. Low chatter and muffled twitches moved through the circle surrounding Navada.

 

“Will you assholes stop movin’ around! Joder no puedo sentir nada!” ( _Fuck I can not feel a thing!_ ) Maddy took a deep breath and began again, this time with light movement. He brought his ear to Nevada’s mouth – nothing.

 

“Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck” Maddy mumbled under his breath.

 

“Wait shut up” No one moved. The faintest thud bounced off Maddy’s thick fingers and he let out a loud sigh.

 

“We gotta break protocol – he has to go to a real hospital. Our docs don’t have the equipment for this” He pointed to the holes left in Nevada’s flesh from the hooks. The men shook their heads, uttering back and forth that jefe would not approve, worrying about the consequences, the punishment Navada would no doubt place on them without mercy.

 

“Fuck it, we have to. He won’t last long if we don’t”

 

“What about that clinic that chick works at, you know the one he saw a while back – what’s it called? On 182 second…no 181 first” Alex said “Urgent care center?… clinic?… She’d take him, the equipment would be there for sure”

 

“Yeah I know the place, better then nothin’” Marco grunted as he and three other men lifted Nevada’s limp body up and over his shoulder. “We gotta go. Get whatever car still runs. Go” He pointed, and the men ran out.

 

“Oh my fuck!” Peter yelled running his hands through his hair. “Martyna! Holy shit Martyna! Where is she…did anyone find her?” Realizing they were all focused on Nevada and not her, he felt ashamed for forgetting. “Her father…”

 

“I already put a call in – he knows. His men are already on the street. We’ll join them as soon as this shit is dealt with” Marco was tiddering with the weight of Navada and Peter grabbed him and flipped him on his shoulders. They quickly walked out the landing and laid Navada down in the back seat of the car. The clinic was about 20 or so minutes from the warehouse Marco estimated. ‘Good’ he thought ‘He doesn’t have much time’.

 

 

* * *

 

.

“Where the fuck is my _daughter_!” Kaczynski’s voice was grinding out of his teeth, cold as ice. He pushed the barrel of the 9mm deeper into the head of the man as he bled from the mouth and ears, head slumped over, so his chin hit his chest.

 

“ _Where!!!”_ He screamed into the mans injured and bloody ear, causing him to cry out into the nothingness of the back room of the restaurant. Kaczynski punched him in the face, then hit him again, and again, until he was unconscious and limp. Blood oozed out the mans face thick and slow; Kaczynski studied the liquid for a moment, somewhat taken with the way it resembled the hot sauce he had with his lunch earlier. He stared at it for a moment longer before shooting him in the head.

 

“Bring me the other one.”

 

The huge men dragged out a skinny, pale faced punk with long dirty hair. Certainly not what he was expecting. Looked more like a kid, trying to be tuff, trying to look like he came from somewhere he definitely did _not_ \- which was anywhere in the Heights. ‘This should be easy’ Kaczynski thought, and he was right. You didn’t last as long as he did in this business by being wrong often. He aimed the gun at the man’s right leg and shot him once before introducing himself. The man wailed and cried and begged Kaczynski not to kill him. He fell on the floor, rolling around holding his leg and whimpering to himself. Kaczynski grabbed a chunk of his hair, forcing the man to look at his face.

 

“Where. The. Fuck. Is. My. _Dauughtteeerrrr!!!”_

 

“I…I..dunno…I..we were just told to take her…get her…”

 

“Who. Who told you.”

 

“Dunno..some rich guy…said whatever the price, he’d pay it….just get rid of her, that’s what he said…that’s..I don’t fucking know their names…please…”

 

“ _Their_ names?” Kaczynski’s eyebrows raised and he stared at the skinny man. ‘More then one’ He thought and began pacing around the floor. ‘Who works in pairs?’ Scratching his round face ‘Very risky to have more then one in charge – too much greed.’ H e continued to pace slowly, fidgeting with his hands behind his back.

 

“Where is my daughter. This is the last time I ask before I blow your head off…just like your friend’s”

 

He pulled the drape open and pointed to the mess of brains and flesh on the floor behind the skinny man. His eyes went wide with fear and sorrow and he began sobbing uncontrollably. His shoulders slumped forward, and he cradled his face in his hands.

 

‘Yes’ Kaczynski thought ‘Easy’.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Martyna awoke wrapped in a dirty burlap sack, bare feet and hands pulled up and out above her head. Her vision was blurred, and she could only see out of her left eye. She felt the nauseating throbbing in her right eye and knew it was swollen shut. The taste of stale blood and sweat was in her mouth and her back felt like there were daggers rubbing into it. It hurt so much. With the slightest movement she screeched in pain, and blacked out again. The gashes and bruises painted her body from head to foot, her mid section exposed from the scrap of burlap he had put her in.

 

 

He watched her swing, unconscious, back and forth. Martyna’s weight pulling her to and fro like a pendulum. He studied her broken body with thoughtfulness, nodding his head with pride as he looked over his work. “Little bitch, who’s laughing now” He stood and walked over to her. “Told ya I’d come for you.” Walking around her, he punched her in the side of her face, then whispered in her unconscious ears. “I’ll snap your neck like a fuckin’ twig” His hands slithered down over her breasts, pausing to feel each one. A knife made quick work of the sack, ripping it open, exposing Martyna’s black and blue chest. He rounded his palms up and under them, amazed at how perfect they were. “Not too much, not too little, just enough.” His tounge ran across his upper lip as he squeezed and kneaded her flesh “I can see why that useless cunt of a boyfriend of yours enjoys fucking you. You two put on quite a show for us in the warehouse darling. It was nice” He ran his tongue up the side of her face and bit her ear. “Very nice”

 

 

“Now, you’ll scream for me”

 

 

He stared at her for a moment, gaging the height of his crotch to the height of her fleshy middle. He tried to wrap her limp legs around his hips but Martyna was too high. Grabbing the chair, he dragged it in front of her. He cut the rope holding her arms up just enough to lower her body to his level. She began to mumble incoherently, saying something under her breath over and over. “Sounds like someone’s coming too” He chirped, putting his ear to her mouth “What was that you say? Please, _please_ don’t hurt me” Now dancing around pretending to be her with a high-pitched, condescending voice. “You think you know what I did muffin, but you don’t. That little slut had it coming, humiliating me in front of my _family!_ My _friends!_ ” His voice echoing through the air as he yelled up at it. “Now every time she looks in the mirror, she’ll remember me, what I did…the scars will remind her.” He began dancing around giggling to himself

 

 

“That pretty face, in pieces”. He dug his fingers in Martyna’s face.

 

 

“Don’t think you are getting off with nothing, you will pay for that little stunt at the festival – a different way…a more ‘ _fun for my cock kinda way’_ darling. I told you you would pay” He unzipped his pants, pulling out his dick and jerking it with one hand.

 

 

“Now, I’m gonna have me some of you, muffin. And you’ll remember…forever”

 

 

He moved between her legs, wrapping them sloppily around his waist. He pulled and yanked them to try to position himself between the limpness. As he became increasingly more frustrated, he didn’t notice the very conscious Martyna staring straight at him. She left her legs limp to keep him distracted, his every attempt to enter her a complete failure. ‘Just wait’ She told herself ‘Just wait’. He finally lined up with her entrance, smiling as he moved forward. He looked up grinning only to find Martyna grinning back, and his face fell hard.

 

 

Martyna locked her legs around his waist and attacked his neck with her teeth, biting a large floppy piece of flesh off as he screamed. She spat the skin out and smashed her forehead off his nose one, two, three times until she heard a pop and crack. Blood fell from his head like a waterfall and she dug her teeth into his neck once more, ripping the dermis and leaving connective tissue to fall loosely. His knees were weak, and he began tittering “Fu..ck..yo.. y..ou” Speaking in gasps he grabbed her throat and punched her hard in the face, causing her to lose her grip around his waist. She pulled down hard with her arms, releasing the rope from the ceiling and she fell on her shoulder with a loud pop, gripping her body where the joint had dislocated. He kicked her in the guts then slipped on a pool of his own blood, banging his head off the ground. Martyna dragged her arm close to her body and grabbed the rope that still tied her hands. She threw it over his chest, then grabbed the other end and pulled them together hard.

 

 

His face was blue, and his tongue darted out of his bloodied mouth – desperately gasping for air as she chocked him. Martyna kept pulling, screaming into the air as she tightened her grip. Her dislocated arm moved with her body like jello, and the eye that she could still see out of was blurry from blood and sweat. Pumped with adrenaline, she felt nothing. She wrapped the rope around his limp body over and over, pulling and yanking. She turned and kicked him in the face, a tooth flying free as she came down with her fists on his stomach. She was lost, enraged. Beating him to a pulp unable to stop herself. Her hands and face covered in a mask of her blood and his. Her legs and mid section dripping with it. She slid and fell, landing on his lifeless body, still punching at his face and chest, still screaming and trying to rip him apart.

 

 

Arms suddenly wrapped around her waist, pulling Martyna to her feet. She wailed, franticly trying to escape whoever was holding her. She swung and kicked the air, screaming to be set free.

 

 

“ _Fuck off!_ ” Her voice rang in the emptiness “ _Don’t touch me!”_

 

 

“ _Marty! Stop! It’s me honey! Stop!”_ The loud voice sounded blurred and far away. Martyna struggled against the arms that now fully encompassing her body “Stop, it’s me, stop it…Marty is me, your alright sweetheart, I’m here” The sound was soothing, and her movements began to slow. She listened to the voice talking to her, realizing who it was trying to help her.

 

 

“Dad.… Dad?” Her voice was trembling, unsure. She tried to look up, but the pain took hold and she toppled over. The stinging shot through her body like a rocket and Martyna’s body went soft. Kaczynski wrapped his daughter up in his jacket, careful not to disturb the dislocation and cause her more grief. He covered her body completely with the soft fabric in a protective cocoon. He motioned for one of his men to take Martyna to the car, carefully passing her into his arms. When his hands were free, he walked over to the lifeless body and unloaded a full magazine into his skull. Just to make sure.

 

 

“Put the other one in the trunk.” Kaczynski ordered “That one’s for Nevada”

 

 

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

 

Nevada awoke slowly. His neck and head secured by a brace and his legs and arms wrapped tightly in heavy bandages. The swelling had subsided enough in his face so he could see out of both eyes. He tried to get up but couldn’t, he moved around the small bed, trying to gage how bad his injuries were under the bandages. ‘Fuck’ He huffed, trying the other side. They were to snug to move under. The events of that night slowly began coming back to him. Nevada’s guts turned, an awful and sick realization flooding his brain. _She_ was not with him. He swallowed a heavy lump of bile that shot up from his sour stomach into his throat. He felt the color drain completely out of his face. He almost threw up.

 

 

_Martyna_

 

 

Nevada yelled for her into the empty room, his voice horse and gritty. He fought the tears that began pooling in his eyes. “Where are you” The last words were just a whisper. He brought his forearm up to his face and wiped his cheek with the bandages. He laid there, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t move, and he couldn’t bare the dark thoughts creeping into his mind. ‘Did she get out? Did the men have her?’ ‘Is she still…?’ The last thought he tried to push away but couldn’t. Rage bubbled up from deep inside him, his teeth gridding so hard in his mouth the cracking of bone on bone echoed through the room. He shouted for his men, ripped out the IV from his arm and threw off the blankets. Trying desperately to free his legs from the entangled sheets. His body ached, pain pulsed through every inch of his body, every twist and turn he felt his skin tearing and pulling. All he knew is that he had to find out what happened to her. He prayed she was still alive.

 

 

“Boss!” Alex and Peter ran in the room, hearing Nevada’s yelling. “You have to be still” Peter said “If you rip out the stiches, they’re gonna have to put them back in again. No one knows where you are Jefe, just us. Your safe” Peter’s last words came out much harsher then intended, and Nevada stopped dead and glared at him. Peter remove his hands from the side of the bed and rubbed the back of his neck, awkwardly clearing his throat. Alex moved from the door way to the bedside. “Doc says you still have a lot of healing to do, but things look not so bad considering…”

 

 

“You brought me to a hospital.” He gritted out “Are you fucking stupid?” The question was rhetorical, but Peter didn’t get it. “You were almost dead... we had to…” His voice cracking slightly.

 

 

“We had to Nevada.” Marco stepped up from behind the curtain “Had there been another way, it would have been done. There wasn’t.” He crossed his muscular arms in front of him, leaning against the wall. “The shape we found you in was dire straits. The blood loss was significant and the wounds…” Marco trailed off “Our Doc is not set up to deal with that kind of shit. I gave the O.K.” His face was stern, but inside he was nervous. It was the best call under the circumstances, and he would do it again, this he was sure of. But Marco also knew Nevada despised insubordination in any form – regardless of the conditions. To him, there were only a few evils that compared.

 

 

Nevada considered this while looking at his men. He trusted Marco, explicitly. He wouldn’t have done something so risky if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Looking at himself, he determined that whatever the wounds were underneath all of this cotton swabbing, it must have been very bad. By the way his body felt right now, he was God damn sure there was some serious lacerations. All and all, Nevada was grateful for the resourcefulness of his men. He knew had it been some other men, he would be dead right now. He decided to let this ride until he was fully recovered and could think clearly.

 

 

“Where’s Martyna?” His voice cracked at her name, and he had hoped his men didn’t notice. He was not prepared to hear the answer, but he had to ask – had to know. His body tensed, waiting for it. Nevada’s stomach was in knots, he never should have left her. If she was dead, it was on him. And he wasn’t sure he would be able to deal with that.

 

 

“I’m here Nevada” Her voice was like heaven. 

 

The sight of her sent butterflies shooting through his body, and he let out the breath he was holding with a sigh. Martyna came hobbling in on one crutch with her arm in a sling. The gash on her eye was almost healed and the remaining bruises on her face had turned a dull yellow. Nevada looked her over, nostrils flaring, his eyes moving up and down her from one injury to the next. His chest puffed, and his lip curled into a hateful snarl.

 

 

“Get out!” He barked at his men.

 

 

Martyna shuffled over to the bed, dropping her crutch she threw herself on Nevada’s chest, crying and placing soft kisses all over his face.

 

 

“Byłem tak zmartwiony, Myślałem, że nie żyjesz ( _I was so worried, I thought you were dead_ ). She took his face in her hands, caressing every inch. She ran her hands down the front of him, touching his bandaged wounds and kissing them one by one. Martyna placed her hands on the gauze wrapped on Nevada's hands and brought them to her face. She nuzzled into them, closing her eyes. He wiped her face and smiled at her. ‘’Look at me” He said in a soft voice. She opened her eyes, and stared into his. He was amazed how the beautiful blue turned to a greeny turquoise when she cried, it was hypnotising. ‘’No one will ever lay a hand on you again. ¿Entender? Eres mía. Mataré a las personas responsables de este” ( _You are mine. I_ _will_ _kill_ _the_ _people_ _responsible_ _for_ _this_ ) Nevada motioned his hand to her face, then down the lenght of her body. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she took him in for the first time since the warehouse. ‘’I thought I lost you, I thought they killed you” Martyna’s voice quivered and her hands went to his face once more. She couldn’t stop touching him.

 

 

Nevada loosely curled his bulky arms around Martyna as she laid on his chest. He closed his eyes and held her tight to his body. “No one will ever lay a hand on you again. _Never_ again, so help me God.” he spoke into her hair and nudged his nose gently across her hairline, kissing along the top of her head. “I promise you that, mi reina.” Martyna pressed her body closer to his, wiggling as if she were burrowing into him, trying to get impossibly closer. She sighed, then yawned. “I am yours...always” she said in a sleepy voice. Nevada thought that was the best thing he had ever heard.

 

 

His men were posted outside the door and around the hospital, taking shifts every couple of hours. ‘No harm will come to her here’ he thought, ‘I will find the people who hurt her’ his guts tightening ‘I will find them, and I will take my time killing them. I will make them feel every slice, every hit…until they are begging me to finish them.’ Nevada looked down at Martyna and watched her sleep, quite snoring noises coming from her parted lips. He held her close all night.

 

 

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

 

After Nevada was released he insisted Martyna stay with him at his apartment indefinitely. Kaczynski shook his head from side to side, waving his finger in Nevada’s face - he wanted to shoot it off, just for fun.

 

 

“No no my boy, she is coming home with me - where she belongs. She is just a child, my child. I can better protect her there, _AND_ ” Kaczynski rose his voice over the beginnings of Nevada’s objection, leaving him standing with his mouth partly open. “ _AND_ I have already arranged a team of nurses to tend to her until she is fully recovered.” He moved toward Nevada and put his hand on his shoulder. “My boy, I understand you have strong feelings for my daughter – I get it. What you don’t understand, is how a father feels for his child, needs to protect his child. There’s no way you could, as you are not a father yourself… “He smirked slightly. "And that, my boy, over runs your need to prove yourself to her because you feel as if you have failed her.”

 

 

Nevada stared at Kaczynski with narrowed eyes. His hands balled into fists so tight, his knuckles were white. “If protection is what you want for Martyna, she is better off with me. My men out number yours, my men are faster, leaner and better equip to deal with shit then yours are. We are not, no disrespect intended, operating like it was back twenty years ago.” Nevada knew the last comment would get Kaczynski railed up. He liked to think of himself as a ‘modern business man’. Hinting he was over the hill and outdated would send his sensitive ego into overdrive. Pay back for the condescending ‘you wouldn’t know, you’re not a father’ bullshit. “Also, I did not fail. Had your men sorted that asshole out months ago, we - she, would never have been in that warehouse with the wrong intel” Nevada leaned against the wall for support, still unsteady on his feet.

 

 

“Watch it boy, remember who your talking to” Kaczynski stepped closer, hands leaving his pockets to rest on his hips

 

 

“Fuck off with the ‘boy’. I am not a boy, I am a man. And I will take _my_ woman where I want her to be - With me! _And_ she will be looked after like no other, by _me,_ with the best medical care _my_ money can buy her…”

 

 

‘God are they ever going to shut the fuck up?’ Martyna rolled her eyes and sighed. Watching the argument become more heated, she leaned up against the wall. ‘Nice of either of them to ask what I want, what I would prefer’ she thought to herself. ‘ _My_ child? _My_ women? Really? Fuck!'

 

 

She rubbed her stomach, cringing, remembering her conversation with the doctor. ‘How long have you had the discomfort’ The doctor asked. ‘About two weeks or so, but not as sharp’ Martyna answered, looking at her stomach. ‘With the injuries you have incurred, there will be pain as you heal. The good news is there is no lasting damage. If these pains become more frequent, or get worse, I want to see you back right away.’ Martyna agreed. The cramps that began a couple weeks ago hadn’t resolved. She had always had painful cycles, but the cramps subsided at some point. These had been aggravating her on and off for a while. She assumed these lasting pains were from the attack, and she hoped they would fade on there own when she healed. Leaning against the wall, she became dizzy; suddenly aware of the nausea that came out of no where and washed over her. She had to bring her hand to her mouth as she felt her saliva pool at the back of her throat. ‘Oh God’ Martyna briskly walked over to the restroom as she began to gag. She pushed open the stall door and fell to her knees, hands gripping the sides of the toilet hard.

 

 

* * *

 

 

When she was released, Martynas father took her home. Nevada reluctantly accompanied her, while his team of men followed closely behind. After much thought, Martyna decide she would stay at Maria’s apartment, one of her best friends, until she made up her mind as to where she was going to live. Maria was visiting her aunt in Ohio for two weeks, enough time for Martyna to breath, and come to terms with that night, and the attack. Both the men huffed, and puffed out their chests, and said 'No', and yelled, and stomped around at her decision. ‘They will not let it go so easy’ she thought.’ Both of them are stubborn pains in the ass. But that's tuff’ She thought to herself 'This works best for me'. Standing in the kitchen of her father’s home, again the nausea took over her and she ran for the bathroom, past the two arguing men. They both stopped and looked at each other, them moved to the door.

 

 

“Mi amor, what is it? Are you ok?” Nevada put his ear up to the door.

 

 

“Honey? What’s wrong? Should I call the doctor?”

 

 

“No – no I’m fine” Martyna tried to sound well but failed “I think those pills the doctor gave me to take at the hospital aren't agreeing with me. I think I should go back tomorrow.” Martyna really didn’t know what else to say. She’ll go back and speak with the doctor tomorrow and see if the prescription can be changed.

 

 

Still…this had been happening for longer then her hospital stay. ‘What if it’s my gallbladder? or spleen? Or something worse?’ She began to envision the worse case scenario and began to panic. “Stop, just think for a moment” Martyna said to herself out loud. “If it were any of those things, they would have found them while I was there” She ran down a mental list in her head of all the diseases she was aware of – none seemed to fit. “Good, that’s good. Still, why am I feeling so sick all the sudden?” She sat against the bathroom wall, rubbing her temples, hoping the nausea wouldn’t return.

 

 

Martyna’s eyes widened and her head popped up, suddenly more awake then she had been all week. She stood up and walked over to the mirror, grabbing the ends of the counter and staring at herself. ‘Jesus’, she thought. ‘It never occurred to me’ A smile crossed her face and her cheeks felt warm. ‘Could I be…pregnant?’

 

 

“Martyna?” Nevada banged on the door “If you don’t come out I’m gonna put my fist threw the fucking door and take you out! Martyna!”

 

 

Martyna unlocked the door and came out slowly. “I’m ok Nevada, I’m just sick, I’m ok” She ran her hands down his face and the tension in his shoulders disappeared. He cupped her face in his hands and brought his mouth to hers. Her tongue flicked inside his mouth, catching his and he moaned. “I must know how you are, and where you are at all times.” She went to speak but he put his finger along her mouth. “At _all_ times.” He wrapped his arms around her and she held him tightly, smiling.

 

Martyna picked up a pregnancy test that evening.

 

 

 

 

 


	12. Chapter 12

 

 

The waiting room at the doctor’s office was fairly depressing, Martyna thought, fidgeting with her hands waiting for her name to be called. Staring closely at the paint, she concluded that the walls were actually white at some point, but the years of neglect and abuse yellowed them to almost a vomit color - the kickboards had their own unique color to them she didn’t want to think about. The whole room screamed ancient, from the huge mustard floral print curtains to the wicker cabinets across from the desk. ‘Do they not have any money to fix this? Maybe update it a bit... at least something from this decade, maybe...’ She wondered, staring at the cobwebs in the corner.

 

 

Martyna was startled at the receptionist calling her name and she gripped her purse before exhaling. ‘Here we go…’she said to herself as she stepped toward the desk. “Dr. Miguel will see you in exam room four. Please put on the gown provided and remove all clothing from the waist down. She will be with you momentarily.” Martyna made her way down the hall, praying this wouldn’t take long. She told Nevada she was going in for a prescription change and would be coming straight back; she did _not_ tell him she had also scheduled an exam and bloodwork. It was the only way she could convince him to let her go by herself, without his men tailing her. She needed privacy now – a concept Nevada just didn’t respect

.

 

‘Could she take any longer, I’m freezing here’ Martyna shifted on the bed, rubbing her hands together and piling her clothing on top of herself for warmth. Her phone rang from the depths of her purse, and she didn’t even have to pick it up to know who was calling. Reaching for her bag when the doctor strolled in. “Shit” She muttered nervously under her breath “he’ll just have to wait”.

 

 

Martyna left the doctors dazed and gitty; frightened and unsure. Apparently, and much to her surprise, you could get pregnant on the pill, even if you don’t miss one… Ever. Although the thought of a baby earlier that week in the bathroom of her father’s house made her stomach flutter, but she didn’t actually believe she was pregnant. She more enjoyed the thought of it. Standing on the steps of the doctor’s office, Martyna kept going over the appointment in her head:

 

 

“Yes, it is possible”. The doctor looked at her with raised eyebrows, clearly not believing she had never missed her dose. Martyna was completely floored. “It accounts for about .1 percent of the population becoming pregnant while taking birth control.

 

 

“Soooo…. your saying it’s one percent absolutely ineffective?”

 

 

 

“Yes, that’s right. It does state this in the package insert”. Dr. Miguel looked sternly at Martyna.” You are extremely lucky you know…considering the injuries you came in here with,” she went over the ultrasound again “there seems to be no adverse effects to the fetus that I can see – but you are still early, we’ll have to keep an eye on this...” Martyna felt her eyes begin to pool with tears and the doctor moved to her side, putting her hand on Martyna’s. “You are still quite early – just a little over eight weeks”. She swallowed and cleared her throat. “We have support groups for young mothers... we also have counsellors you can talk too about any decision regarding alternative avenues you may, or may not consider right for you.” You have a lot to think about Martyna, give yourself the time to do so, ok? Take the information home I gave you and read through it. I want to see you back in three weeks.”

 

 

The cold air ran through her standing on the stoop and she shuttered. Martyna looked up and stuck her tongue out to catch the snowflakes that were falling gently from the sky. ‘Eight weeks’ she thought ‘I have a living being inside me, breathing – alive…a baby.’ Her hand went to touch her belly, absentmindedly rubbing it. She shook her head, wondering how she could have possibly taken this whole idea of pregnancy so lightly before. She gathered her coat up to her neck to protect from the wind, it was hard for her to wrap her head around it. It was like she walked in the doctors one person, and walked out a completely different person – all in a little over an hour on a Tuesday morning. Just like that, forever changed.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Matryna!” She jumped back at the sound of her name “Martyna! What the hell you doin’?!”

 

 

Nevada had his head stuck out the back window of the Fleetwood as Peter pulled up to the curb. He got out and marched over to her, she could tell he was mad ‘Great’ she thought, rolling her eyes ‘Just what I need’.

 

 

“Martyna. What. The. Fuck. are you doing standing on the stoop of this place? You said you had to change your prescription and you’ve been gone for almost two hours! I told you, I must know where you are at all times. Period. Did you not hear your phone? I called three times…” She stared at him as he verbally blasted her, tuning him out as her thoughts went to her tummy. ‘Fuck I don’t need this right now.’ Realizing she was holding all the booklets the doctor had given her Martyna roughly pushed them in her purse so Nevada didn’t see the baby pictures on the front. He was still going on and she lost him ages ago. “…so you have to come – _now_ – and tell me that this is the other fuck that touched you” He grabbed her waist and pulled her to him, licking his lips “No one touches you but me, mi reina. He will pay with his life.” He jerked Martyna close and kissed her long and deep. She relented, returning the kiss with just as much heat.

 

 

Nevada held her arm, helping her down the slippery steps of the doctor’s office to the waiting car. “Get in”. When she looked out the window before Peter left, she saw Dr. Miguel staring at her from the door. The doctor shook her head. Her eyes were both angry and sad at the company Martyna was leaving with. Shame rose up from her core and she looked away, unable to keep her eyes from clouding over with tears. ‘What the hell am I doing’ she repeated over, and over to herself in the car. She was driving to a place to end a man’s life. ‘What the hell am I doing…’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	13. Chapter 13

 

 

“Stop the car” Martyna eyed Peter through the rear view “Stop, I want out”

 

 

“He’s not stopping the car – drive” Nevada waved his hand, not bothering to look up from the newspaper. Martyna glared at him, livid he completely brushed her off. He’d never done that before. She didn’t want to do this, she didn’t ask for this, she didn’t fucking want to be here at all. She looked at him – something was off, but she was too mad to give the feeling attention. ‘That smug son of a bitch’ she stewed. ‘Equals my ass’.

 

 

“I said _‘STOP THE FUCKING CAR. NOW!”_ Peter pulled the car to the curb and Martyna got out and purposely slammed the door in Nevada’s face. She knew it wasn’t a good idea, he would take it as disrespect, but she was too flustered to care. She threw her purse over her shoulder and marched toward the graffitied metal door of the club she used to frequent with her friends, swinging it open. Hopefully she would find some of them in there…it been so long, she missed them…She could hear Nevada screaming at her as he ran toward the door.

 

 

“ _MARTYNA!_ Get the fuck back here _DO YOU HEAR ME_! I swear to Christ when I get my hands on you…” She slammed the door. Hard.

 

 

The music was so loud she felt the bass in her chest. Martyna pushed through the crowd toward an empty spot near the bar - the place was packed for a Tuesday afternoon. She tried to move through a group of three drunks when one of them grabbed her ass. “Piss off asshole” She tried to move around them, avoid them, not wanting to get involved. For the first time she could remember, Martyna feared what would happen to her – what would happen to her baby. The drunk kept trying to pull her on his lap by her forearm. “Hey baby, why you fussin’? I’m a nice guy if you get to know me” The drunk licked his lips, staring at her breasts “’Cause I _really_ want to get to know…” Without thinking, she punched him in the face. A habitual reaction she always prided herself on now had her recoiling, again worried about the tiny person growing inside her. The punch resulted in a cracking sound heard even over the music. The drunk clasped his hands over his face, blood oozing out from underneath his fingers. The drunks friend grabbed Martyna’s jacket at the neck and backhanded her so hard she went flying into the bar. Her lip was split open, seeping blood over the bars shinny veneer. The drunk’s friend was trying to grab her shoulder, reaching for her face...

 

 

_BANG!_ A loud, unmistakeable noise rung out through the crowd.

 

 

People were screaming, running for the door. Martyna looked at the drunk in front of her. She watched the life drain from his eyes, his lifeless body collapsed to the floor. She threw up beside him. Nevada picked her up roughly and held her to him so tight he was hurting her. He fired three more shot into the air and the large crowed became silent, terrified they would be next.

 

 

“ _ANYBODY_ try that shit again and they are dead. _NO BODY_ touches what’s mine. Ever.” Nevada’s voice brimmed with rage. He pushed Martyna toward the door to the back room so hard she almost smacked her face on it. She went tripping inside, only to find a man tied up to a chair, whimpering and pleading for his life. She recognized him instantly– it was the guy from the festival, pycho assholes friend that kidnapped her. “What...why are you…” She began but was soon thrown up against the cinderblock wall, lifted by her throat, her legs were kicking uncontrollably under her. Nevada held her up and banged her head against the wall, Martyna flinched in pain. Maddy and Alex turned away, hating themselves for it.

 

 

“So, you think you’re a big shot huh, think you can just do whatever the fuck you want too…” His face was red, and veins were popping out at the side of his head. Martyna couldn’t breath, and all she thought about was the baby. “Nah…nah…vada” was all she could breath, grasping at his hands. He stared at her dead in the face. “You do whatever the fuck _I_ say, you hear me! You go where _I_ say you go. You do what ever the fuck _I_ say you do. I’ve fucking had it with your shit. You belong to me. You do what _I_ tell you. Understand?” She looked into his eyes, and he wasn’t there. There was no soul there – it was terrifying.

 

 

Nevada dropped her on the floor and began pacing around. Martyna knelt on the floor coughing and holding her throat. “Because of this bullshit – your bullshit, we gotta move this to another location. The cops will no doubt be here any minute…” he rubbed his chin. Walking over to where she knelt rubbing her neck and side, Nevada grabbed her hair so hard she cried out. “See that” He pointed to the man in the chair “We were driving here for you – did you fucking know?” He squeezed her scalp until she sobbed in pain. “I was gonna let you finish him off. Your old man _saved_ him for me” His sarcastic tone not lost on anybody and he laughed. A laugh Martyna had never heard before… it wasn’t him at all. She didn’t know who it was.

 

 

Without warning, Nevada pulled his gun and emptied the magazine in the mans face. Martyna was covered in the mans remains, screaming in disbelief, disgust and horror. He was completely unrecognizable. Martyna was shaking, afraid to look up, afraid to move. She sat on the dirty floor crying with her hands over her face. “Just stop” she sobbed “Just make it go away” Her voice tiny, just a whisper. “Just stop…”

 

 

She felt a hand on hers and she screamed, sliding on her hands and knees on the floor to the corner, tears running down her cheeks. “Don’t touch me”. She yelled. “Martyna, it’s me – it’s Maddy.” He could see she was terrified. He wanted to punch himself for not stopping this. It had gone beyond the point of too far and he hated himself for letting it. “I won’t hurt you, it’s me Martyna, Maddy. We must go, now. Please, let me help you.” Maddy’s voice was pleading, and she looked up at him, blood and mascara ran down her face. “Maddy?” He picked her up gently, careful not to hurt her. She wrapped her arms around his thick neck and he carried her out the back-service entrance. One of her father’s men were waiting in the car for her. Maddy carefully placed her in the back seat and buckled her in. “I’m so sorry Martyna. I never wanted this” She looked up at him and weakly smiled “I know, thank you Maddy.” The sound or sirens signaled it was time to go and they drove the back way to the main road.

 

 

Martyna curled up in the back seat and cried, rocking herself. She wanted to run away, far away from this place and these streets. But where? Where could so go? Mob boss father and drug dealing boyfriend? Everyone knew her here, and knew them. Her head was spinning. “Miss Martyna” The driver reached back with a box of Kleenex and she took it gratefully. “Thank you Jan. Take me to Marie’s apartment, I’ll call my father from there.” Jan nodded.” I will stay with you there until your father comes.” She smiled, thankful for the company.

 

 

Martyna looked out the window at the passing cars and wondered where Nevada went. He just left her there. On the floor. If Maddy didn’t get her, would he have come back? Or would the cops have pick her up? No doubt resulting in jail time, questioning… He just left her there, she couldn’t believe it. Tears streamed down her face, and she realized that when push comes to shove, _he_ was first. She was last. ‘ I should have known it would come to this’ She rubbed her tummy, staring down at it. ‘How could I be so stupid’. Right there, at that moment, Martyna made a promise to her unborn child. ’You will not grow up in this, so help me God…” and she began praying for an answer, to any higher power that would listen.

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

 

 

It had been three weeks since the incident at the club. Martyna had never before felt that way in the face of danger, so afraid, so helpless. Never had she felt those emotions, they paralyzed her; and she had been in situations far worse then that. Having grown up in a crime family, violence came with the territory. Her father tried to spare her as much as he could, given his occupation. But, in the end, it was what it was.

 

 

On the advice of her father’s personal physician, Martyna began to write down all her feelings about that night, “This will help you sort through your thoughts.” He said, “You can better work through your feelings when they are in front of you, rather then floating around in your head”. She found she quite enjoyed the art of writing, and began keeping a daily journal of anything she deemed worthy – which consisted mostly of baby, and Nevada.

 

 

She hadn’t spoke to him since that night. He would call all hours of the day, she ignored it. He sent flowers and gifts daily, always with a note saying the same thing: ‘ _I miss you. Please call me. Lo siento mucho_ ’ Sometimes, while Martyna was sitting having tea on the window ledge in Marie’s kitchen, she would see the Fleetwood slowly drive by – almost stop in front of the apartment, then drive away. She could see Nevada looking up as the car pasted, looking for her. He was warned not to be near the apartment for any reason, the gifts were always brought to her by the guard’s.

 

 

Martyna rubbed her tiny belly as tears pooled in her eyes. Even after everything that happened, she still missed him – a lot. It was like a piece of her soul had been torn away. Angry tears fell slowly into her lap. “Why am I missing him? How can I feel anything for him after what he did to me?” She wiped her face and pulled a beige folder from her bag. It was her first ultrasound photo and write up from Dr. Miguel; she was three months and one week along according to the measurements. Amazingly, all was well with the baby after all her body was put through. ‘It’s a sign’ she thought. Martyna took the picture out and smiled, running her fingers softly across the matte finish. “Perfect” she whispered, and kissed the small square of paper.

 

 

Martyna had spent many sleepless nights agonizing over what she was going to do. She knew staying in the Heights wasn’t an option, no way would she raise this child so close to this violence. But even if she had protection from the many rival gang members that would use her, and her baby as bait and bargaining tools, if someone wanted to send a message to either Nevada or her father by killing either one of them, they would. Just like that. For the rest of their lives, they would live in fear of becoming just that – bait.

 

 

‘Live in fear.’ She remembered her Mom always rushing, always afraid. She would wrap her coat around Martyna anyplace outside the house. Her Mom passed when she was young, and Martyna had always wondered if it was because of her father’s occupation. He told her it wasn’t, that her Mom had died of cancer. She wondered if that was true, she was too young to remember. Not that he would tell her anyways… Martyna contemplated that for many days. ‘Our entire life. Always looking over our shoulders, never being able to leave for any reason without bodyguards, no privacy, always in fear someone will try to hurt us, take us’ her eyes went to her tummy ‘Take you’. She had been around this shit long enough to know that these kinds of people would not hesitate to take a baby or child and use them to negotiate with. They just wouldn’t have two fucks to give regarding it. You don’t live a good life of crime because you have a conscious. In fact, Martyna was quite sure many of the ‘Uncles’ she knew growing up were raging psychopaths.

 

 

After many heart wrenching debates with herself, Martyna decided she would leave Washington Heights. She also decided she would not tell Nevada about the baby. If he found out she was pregnant, he would never let her leave, they would be trapped there, forever. Not an easy decision, but she felt it was the right one.

 

Her best friend Maria, who’s apartment she was staying at indefinitely, told Martyna she was leaving her aunt’s house in Ohio in a week and a half when her cousins come to take it over. From Dayton, Maria and her aunt were flying to Toronto to visit relatives, then Maria was flying back to New York the following week. Her aunt was staying in Toronto getting her new apartment together. “Why don’t you come?” Maria said excitedly “You can meet us at the airport and we’ll all go to Tony’s together! You guys haven’t seen each other in years!” Martyna always loved the way her friend was always so excited about life, so vibrant. She hoped she’d feel the same someday. The long pause in Martynas response on the phone prompted Maria to question if anything else had happened since the attack, and she broke down in tears. Martyna poured her heart out and told her friend everything she had been keeping from her. They spoke for hours about Nevada, her father, her pregnancy and leaving the Heights. Feeling as though she totally monopolized the entire conversation, Martyna asked how her aunt was holding up and is she feeling better. Maria told Martyna her aunt was still not back to herself and would need to find someone to help her get settled…

 

 

“Maria? Hello?”

 

 

“You could do it!” Maria beamed “That’s it Marty! You can be my aunt’s helper – errand girl, you know, until she is back on her feet! _There’s_ your job _AND_ your place to live until you get your shit together – it’s fucking PERFECT!” She was giggling on the other end “Whattch say? Think about it K? We don’t fly out for another week and a half anyhow. That’s plenty of time…” Her voice changed tone. “Martyna, there isn’t any other place you can go where he won’t find you, then what? What happens to you and the baby then...think about it ok?”

 

 

“Ok. Love ya lots, thanks for everything”

 

 

“Back at ya, and anytime. I’ll call soon” Martyna sat on the windowsill, staring out at the street.

 

 

Four days later she called Maria and said she was coming.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Past Is Done, The Present Is Coming :)...Thanks For Reading, And Thanks For The Kudos!

 

 

Nevada sat in the corner diner at the seat next to the large bay window. He sipped an espresso and drew figure eights with his finger in the ring the bottom of the cup had left. It had been three weeks since he left Martyna lying on the floor covered in blood. He just left her there. Not because the cops were coming, not because of anything. He wanted to teach her a lesson - school her in who was boss, do what the fuck she was _told_ to do. Nevada had never seen her like that, so afraid…so afraid of him. He took another sip and ordered a piece of apple pie a la mode. Gazing out the window he saw several couples walking by holding hands and laughing. He thought of her, how much he missed her. Nevada was never a sappy, romantic person – but he had depth, and she saw it in him.

 

 

He thought back to when he saw her for the first time playing soccer by the tracks and smiled. It faded quickly as memories of three weeks ago crept in his head. Her light and airy laugh was replaced by screams of horror and fear. Heat rose inside as anger took over him. He backhanded the plate sending the pie flying off the table, the plate and cup smashing into tiny pieces. He ran his hands through his hair and brought his fists down hard on the table “Fuck!” How could he have done that to her. ‘She was the one…’ He thought ‘how could I’… Nevada got up and threw a hundred on the table. He stormed out, knocking chairs over as he pushed open the door. The waitress nervously began picking up the broken dishes covered in pie.

 

 

Nevada lit a cigarette on the sidewalk, waving his men to pick him up from down the block. He had all these emotions running around his head, all these _feelings_ he couldn’t deal with. ‘You hurt her. Bad’ the voice in his head plagued him ‘This is your fault’ He rubbed his eyes “Fuck off!” He yelled, trying to silence his conscious as the people walking by him immediately crossed the street. ‘She will never come back to you…’ He felt like ripping his own head off.

 

 

Nevada threw his smoke on the ground and yanked open the car door. “The club. Drive” The new kid behind the wheel nodded and pulled into traffic. Peter took off a few days after the shooting and never came back, Nevada doubted he‘d ever see him again. He knew Peter would never rat him out to the cops, ‘Fear will keep him in line’ he thought. Nevada wouldn’t allow himself to feel regret, or sadness, for what happened. He fought every inkling of any feelings coming to the forefront inside of him. ‘Don’t need him, he was weak.’ He remembered how Peter got teary when Maddy told him about the state Martyna was in when he picked her up off the floor. Peter put his head down and rubbed the back of his neck for a long minute. “Where is she Mad’s?” His voice was full of genuine concern. Nevada hated it, hated hearing his concern for her well being. He was his man, he was supposed to do his fucking job and not feel anything, and never question his actions. Peters concern for Martyna did just that. Question his authority, question what he had done in the back room of that club. Nevada would not let himself give in to that little voice in his head that said he was a shit heel, abusive asshole, and if he was going to live in denial about who he really was then God damnit so was everyone else!

 

 

Nevada sat in his newly acquired club sipping his drink and staring down onto the dance floor. Everywhere he looked he saw her… Martyna. He looked away in anger when he realized the girl he was looking at wasn’t her. But just for that moment, his heart jumped, at the thought of seeing her again. The blonde in his lap was doing a shit job of distracting him from his thoughts. He grabbed a chunk of hair, not caring she let out a yelp of pain and thrust himself into her mouth. “Fuck yes, take it” Her mouth was warm and wet and he closed his eyes. He saw Martyna, naked and on her knees. She was so beautiful. The way she looked up at him and teased him when she knew he was close, drawing out his pleasure. The way she ran her tongue up and down his cock until he couldn’t stand it anymore. How they would lie together in bed, staring into each others’ eyes, holding hands…she said she was his, always.

 

 

He came, and when he finished, he pushed the blonde off his lap and told her to tell her friend to come up. Nevada lined his empty glass with the many others as he saw the girl come over. “I’m going to fuck you, and make you so fucking wet you’ll come in seconds. Are you dripping for me whore? Do you want my big cock?’ She rounded the table and Nevada felt her wetness. He was already rock hard and bent her roughly over the table, where everyone could see.” I’m going to stick my hard cock in your tight little cunt in front of everyone. You like that” She moaned at the movement of his hand rubbing her clit hard.” You gonna come on my cock slut” She yelled and moaned and he thrust inside her, not caring who saw it. And when he came, he cried out Martyna’s name. It didn’t matter how many drinks he had or who he fucked, he couldn’t get her out of his mind and it was driving him crazy. He had to see to her.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Martyna took a look around the apartment before heading downstairs to the waiting car. “I’m so scared” she said to no one. She smiled as she remembered the fun times her and Maria had here. ‘This is just temporary, until you figure out how to deal with this’ She told herself. Giving the place one last look, she locked the door. Handing the keys to Mrs. Masik who lived next door, and saying good bye, Martyna felt an overwhelming sadness. Nevada. He plagued her thoughts every waking minute. It made her furious to think it came to this. ‘What I would have given for us to be a family.’ Tears began running down her face and she sucked them up, tired of crying. Martyna took the stairs down, not waning to run into anyone. She didn’t feel like talking, and she didn’t feel like bursting into tears in front of a stranger because that just might happen right now. She would rather avoid the situation all together.

 

 

Her father had arranged a new car to pick her up with tinted windows and an unknown driver to take him, Jan and Martyna to the airport. Kaczynski knew if anyone saw her even close to the airport Nevada would be informed – something he did not want for his daughter, or his grand baby. He smiled at the thought. When Martyna finally came clean about her pregnancy, she cried so hard and for so long that there came a point where she literally ran out of tears. Her father hugged her through the entire episode, not uttering a word, just holding her. He understood why she had to leave. He knew more then anyone that this life, with these people, was no place for a child. He always regretted keeping Bea here, Martynas Mother. ‘With age comes wisdom, to most’ he thought. ‘If I had let her go instead of being a selfish child, she might be alive today, and Martyna might have a Mom.’ But it was not so, he made his bed – and his daughter had to lie in it, pay for his arrogant youth and poor judgement. He told her her Mother died of cancer, it was not so. She died of a gun shot wound, took her life instantly. Kaczynski would not make the same mistake with his daughter, or his grand baby.

 

 

He kissed Martyna and handed her a phone. “It’s a secure line and can’t be tracked. Call when you get to Tony’s. I took the liberty of filling him in on what’s going on…I hope that was ok Marty” He didn’t want to upset her further. “Yep, I will miss you so much Dad – I’m so scared” She clung to her father in the car. He held he tight and kissed her head. “You are in good hands Martyna. Maria and Tony’s family will take great care of you until you get on your feet. And I’m only a phone call away” He hugged her again “I will come up as soon as things settle down here” He held her face in his hands. “Now go, Jan” he pointed to the front seat “will follow behind you. Keep your glasses and hat on until you board. You’ll be fine my dearest daughter. I love you Martyna”

 

 

“I love you too Dad” She quickly disembarked the car and walked, with her head partly down, into the terminal, Jan following close behind. Kaszynski watched from the car until she was out of sight. “God speed my dear” Signaling the driver he sped away. With a sigh of relief, the thought that his daughter just might have the opportunity for a normal life with her child, made him tear up with joy.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Nevada finally went back to his apartment. It was a pig sty; empty bottles, used coke bags, ashtrays that were over flowing with half smoked joints and cigarette butts. The floor was covered in so much garbage he couldn’t see the carpet. And it stunk. “What the fuck is that smell!” He stumbled over a whiskey bottle that almost put him into the corner of the wall. “See this” Nevada spun his arms around “I want all this shit clean, you got it?” The cleaning service workers all nodded and began dressing appropriately: Masks, elbow length gloves and plastic pants to cover theirs from the filth.

 

 

He was only buzzed today, something he planned on changing very soon. Since Martyna had broke all contact with him, Nevada was a complete drunken mess. Even Marco, someone who had been around with him for years, had never seen him like this. He even had to take over the business dealings as Nevada was just fucked the better part of the days. “He better pull his fucking head ‘out his ass before our customers go to those assholes in Jersey” Marco had said to Alex “This is a bit too fucking far”.

 

 

Nevada carefully navigated the shit on his floor to make it to the bathroom. He didn’t remember the last time he showered so he thought it was a good idea to maybe do that. He had been with so many women over the last couple of weeks, he hoped he remembered to wear a condom. He decided after the shower he would get himself checked out before heading back to his newly acquired club.” Fucker didn’t have my money, so I took his club” He said to himself, stepping out of his pants. His pockets were full of receipts and Kleenex that spilled onto the floor. He picked them up by a handful and threw them at the waste paper basket. He missed, and they lay on the floor beside the toilet. “God damit” He cursed and grabbed the garbage. “Hey!” he called to the cleaners “Somebody wanna empty this?” One of the crew came in and quickly dumped the contents into a large garbage bag causing some of it to drop back on the floor. Nevada glared at the kid as he bent down to pick it up. “Wait. Stop” Nevada saw something under some Kleenex’s and bent down to see what it was.

 

 

“Get out” He barked suddenly “All of you, get the fuck out right now!” Everyone moved at top speed to the hallway and closed the door.

 

 

Nevada sat on the edge of the tub, staring at the plastic stick in front of him. He stared at it for a long time. His lip quivered and tears ran down his cheeks. He put his head in his hands and cried. Loosing his balance, he fell into the tub, and began screaming her name while his hands moved crazily over his face trying to comfort himself, still holding the little plastic stick. Nevada shot up from the tub, punching everything in sight. His knuckles were bloody and broken, his arms were scraped the point where he’d need stiches from them running along the wires inside the drywall. He banged his head numerous times against the wall, popping the skin open on his forehead. Finally exhausted, he fell against the wall and sobbed. There was no where left to hide from himself.

 

 

Martyna was pregnant. She was pregnant with his baby, _their_ baby. “What if I hurt it” he sobbed “Oh God” Only now did he realize the extent of what he had done. Only now did he realize why she was behaving the way she was, and why she was so scared.

 

 

Shame and disgust filled his core. Oh how he hated himself right now. She was trying to protect the baby. “I never asked what the fuck was going on, I never asked what was wrong...” Nevada realized he didn’t ask, because he didn’t care. He never saw her as a person, a human being. He only saw her as a thing to control – to own. He never allowed himself the luxury of feeling what he truly did for Martyna, what he denied himself, but was inside him regardless of the wall he put up - the lies he told himself were true.

 

 

Nevada pulled himself up on the bathroom counter, and stared at his reflection. He was covered in blood and his hands throbbed. The bathroom looked like several bombs went off simultaneously.

 

 

She was gone. This he knew. The aching in his heart told him so. He stared at himself for a long time. He allowed himself to feel what he always knew was true, how he felt about her. He decided this time, will be the last time he permits himself to feel. He looked at himself again, tears brimming on the surface of his eyes…

 

 

“I love you Martyna. With everything I am.”

 

 

Whatever goodness was still in him died that day. And it sealed his fate for decades to come.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	16. The Present

 

 

****

Martyna sat at the bay window, sipping her morning coffee and watching the sunrise over the trees of the vacant lot across the street from her house. This was her favorite spot. She sat there every morning, sipping coffee and planning her day. She found that if she was rushed and missed the opportunity to collet herself there, her entire day went to shit. She thought it was funny: the older she got, the more she loved her little routines. When she was younger, the repetition board her. She was always running here, there, all over the place. ‘Thank God that’s over’ Martyna thought with a sigh. A Cadillac pulled up to the stop sign at the end of the street that separated her property from the vacant lot. She watched the car squeal a hard left around the corner and disappear onto the main road. ‘Kids trying to be cool’ she huffed. ‘I wonder if they realize we all know they’re driving their parent’s vehicle.’ She laughed at the thought, and _he_ suddenly popped in her mind.

 

Nevada.

 

It had been twenty some odd years since she left New York for Toronto; following her best friend to a place she had never been, and a country she knew nothing about. Nineteen, pregnant, absolutely terrified with no clue what the hell she was doing or where she was going. But she did know, even being so young, that there would be no life for her baby if she stayed. Sure, it certainly would have been the easier thing to do, but not the best. And her child deserved the best start in life she could offer. Sometimes Martyna wondered what their lives would have been like had she chosen the easier route, to stay there, with him. She was sure nothing good would have come of it, she _knew_ nothing good would have come out of that. ‘With age, comes wisdom’ her father used to say, and how right he was.

 

 

Martyna thought of Nevada more often then she would admit too. She wondered if he was still in the life, if he was married with a family of his own, if he was still alive…. He never tried to contact her when she left. Not that she thought he would travel to Toronto to find her (He never stepped foot outside New York. Ever.) However, she was pleasantly surprise when he didn’t try to contact her - at all - since she had the same number as when she lived in New York for a while. Just wasn’t high on the list of priorities at the time to change. Martyna guessed her father, who passed away peacefully at his estate a few years back, had _everything_ to do with Nevada's complete lack of communication. He never brought it up, and she never asked. Martyna thought she might see Nevada the times she went home to visit her Dad, or at his funeral, but she never did. She sometimes wondered if the feelings she felt for him, the intensity, the connection, was simply hormones gone wild, or, was he truly the one... _her_ one. She would never know. She hoped it was the former, not the latter.

 

 

Lost in thought, she spilled some coffee on her P.J bottoms and cursed at the heat, trying to rub it off quickly. ‘Shit’. Martyna walked over to the kitchen sink, grabbing a towel she gently dabbed the stain. Her pajamas were more snug then they used to be, thanks to the lowered metabolism of the ‘Over forty Club’, (as her dear friend so kindly put it), pretty much everything was feeling a tad more snug these days. But Martyna did feel great, the best she had felt in years. Her life was good, and she was thankful for that. A few wrinkles here and there, but she liked them. ‘I earned every single one of these’ she whispered to her reflection in the mirror by the sink, smiling at herself.

 

 

The noise of her phone vibrating on the counter signaled the beginning of the work day. Sighing, Martyna finished her coffee and grabbed her phone. She watched as emails began to flood her inbox and text notifications dinged one after the other. She put the phone back on the counter and walked to the window, wishing she could have just five more minutes…. _ding, ding – ding ding_ ‘Not today girl’ she groaned, walking toward her phone once more. ‘Let’s get a move on’ she said to herself.

 

 

Martyna walked down the hall of the bungalow toward her bedroom, admiring the photos that hung on the wall of her family life, past and present. She stopped to try and look at each one individually, like she had a billion times before, remembering all the good times. The number of pictures on the tiny wall was ridiculous, but she loved that it was so crowded with amazing memories. Making her way down the hall, she banged loudly on the door to her son’s room as she passed.

 

 

“Sean! Get up! If you want a ride today, you better move it! Or you’ll have to take the bus again, I gotta leave in 20!”

 

 

 

 

 


	17. Chapter 17

 

 

“Mom can I talk to you a minute” Sean stood in the threshold of the living room and the kitchen, leaning up against the side of the wall with his arms crossed. He stared at her with large green eyes under shaggy brown hair. ‘God he looks like his father sometimes’ Martyna thought looking at her son. Even his ‘I wanna talk to you’ stance was the same. Smirking, she wondered if it was genetic.

 

 

“Uh huh” Martyna took off her glasses and pushed her laptop aside “Shoot”

 

 

Sean looked at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck, grabbing the bright blue chair and flipping it around so he straddled it as he sat. He took a deep breath, and tried to speak, then shook his head. Sean tried several more times, but his breath caught in his throat. He finally looked up at his Moms concerned face and smiled. Any sign of difficulty was always greeted with concern from his Mother. He loved how she was always there for him. Now in his 20’s, he admired and respected her more then ever. Considering where she came from and where she is now, she deserved nothing less in his opinion.

 

 

“Soooo…” Sean elongated the ‘o’s’, procrastinating even more – it drove Martyna nuts.

 

 

“Just tell me Hon. Is there something I should know?” She looked at him sternly through black eyelashes.

 

 

“No!” He laughed “No, nothing like that – no ‘girl’ Sean put his fingers up, mimicking parentheses, “problems or situations. I…I have a question for you. I have been thinking a lot about this, weighing the pros and cons…Sean licked his lips resting his hand on his chin. ‘My God’ Martyna stared ‘Just like Nevada’ She was starting to worry about the path this conversation was going down. She silently prayed that this discussion with her son, was not _that_ discussion. The one she dreaded, the one she knew was inevitable but hated to think about, and hoped he would just never ever say it.

 

 

“I want to meet him”.

 

 

Martyna’s heart sank to her stomach and a warm nausea came over her all at once. She could feel her hands tremble and she folded them in her lap under the table so Sean wouldn’t see. A rush of blood ran straight to her face and she felt dizzy and unfocused, shifting in her seat. ‘Fuck I’m not ready for this’ Martyna thought, panic rising through her core.

 

 

“Mom?” Sean stood up, waiting for her to faint. He looked at his Moms sheet white face and blank eyes and he didn’t know what to do. He had never seen his Mom like this before, she looked, well, scared wasn’t the right word but some degree of it – or something. “Mom are you ok?” Sean leaned over in front of her, and her eyes followed his. “Mom I…” Martyna dragged the chair backward to give herself space to move and got up. Her hand was on her mouth and her left arm was crossed over her mid section, pulling on the waist of her silk blouse and dress pants.

 

 

“I just need a moment Sean, excuse me…” Martyna walked out of the kitchen as the chair she left behind crashed onto the floor with a loud thud. She didn’t even notice.

 

 

Martyna sat on her white duvet and cupped her face in her hands. The tears poured down her cheeks and she sat and sobbed for a long while. She always knew this day would come, always knew he would ask that question, one day. ‘Why now’ she said to herself quietly ‘Everything is so good, why now…’ Sadness gripped her entire insides and she felt dread and fear creep up into the corners of her mind. Martyna always thought Sean would give her some advanced indication that the question was coming. Some behavior, or asking things in a round a bout way…but she never saw this coming. Truth be told when he asked to talk to her, she thought it was regarding his own vehicle as the two of them shared the Yukon. Many times Sean had to Uber it and sometimes take the bus to work if Martyna had a six am meeting. Now it was asked. What was she supposed to do now? He had every right to ask to meet his father – it’s _his_ father. Not like he needed permission, he could just go and try to locate him if he wanted too. She couldn’t stop him, Sean was a grown man. ‘What the hell am I gonna do now? After everything he knows about him, all the shit I told him about his lifestyle, and us, and how I got here…I thought it would have deterred him – _fuck!”_ But it didn’t. Martyna looked around her room and felt a new wave of tears stream down her face. She guessed a boys’ need to meet his father is stronger then stories from the past.

 

 

Sean sat at the kitchen table fidgeting with a pen. He could see his Mom was visibly upset, and he knew that asking to meet his Dad, asking that question, there would never be a good time for it. Ever. He knew he didn’t need permission, and he knew his Mom knew that as well. What he did need was help in locating him, and he knew his Mom would be able to do that, given she still had close ties to her friends in New York. Namely, Maria.

 

 

Sean was well aware of the lifestyle his father lead. When he was old enough, his Mom told him everything that had happened. He’ll never forget the waves of emotions he felt listening to her describe the horrible things that went on, the disgusting, gut turning things you think only happens in film, that’s not real. But his Mom also talked about a different side, a loving side of him. He’ll never forget how his Mom’s face lit up when she spoke about that. Sean had never seen her look like that before with any of her boyfriends, even the ones she was with for years. They were good guys, no doubt about it. But whatever his Mom and Dad had so many years ago, Sean believed it was still there, she still felt it.

 

 

Sean turned to find his Mom standing at the sliding glass doors to the patio with her arms crossed, smiling at him. He smiled back, and there was a long silence before she spoke.

 

 

“I’m sorry, I needed a moment alone.” He could tell she had been crying, and he wished there was an easy way to do this and spare her feelings. “I understand why you want to know your father, don’t think that I don’t…. It’s just because of who he is and what he does…it makes me so afraid for you, for us. I worked so hard to keep you out of that so you could have a normal life, go to a good school, succeed on your own terms and because of your hard work. Not because someone was afraid you would blow their heads off if they didn’t comply because you are Nevada Ramirez’ son.” Martyna voice rose at his name and she calmly collected herself for a moment afterwards. Taking a deep breath, she continued. “I always knew this day would come. I guess I was just hoping it never would.” She walked over to Sean and hugged him tightly for a long minute. “I’ll make some calls, but I need time” Sean hugged his Mom again and nodded. “I know, Thanks Ma” He left the kitchen and headed down the stairs to the basement, leaving Martyna in the kitchen. While she made herself a cup of tea, she wondered what the fuck she thought she was doing. “I don’t know what the fuck I have just got myself into…. I’m not even sure I can do this” Sipping her tea, Martyna thought about Nevada. She thought about how he would react finding out he had a son she had never told him about. Her head was spinning and she needed rest. She headed to her room, lost in thought. Completely forgetting about the small plastic stick with the plus sign she had thrown out in the trash. The same one Nevada accidentally found over twenty years ago.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

 

 

 

A week and a half later, (and a heap of bullshit later sold to everyone regarding her trip, including her son) Martyna was flying out of Pearson International, to LaGuardia Airport in New York. She was so excited to see Maria, it really had been too long. She tried not to think too much about the _other_ one.

 

 

Squished between a mouth breathing snorer and some jackass who thought it prudent to take off his shoes _and_ his socks to relax (Martyna cursed herself for being so cheap and not paying for first class), she was _very_ ready to get off the damn plane. She jerked her shoulder hard and giggled to herself when the woman jolted awake with a gasp. Martyna could tell she had no idea where she was for a few seconds, then leered over at her, drool making a slow line down her chin. ‘Fuck sake…’ She thought ‘How long is this flight?’ With a sigh of relief she didn’t try to hide, the intercom fizzled on and the captain began her landing commentary. ‘Thank God’ Martyna mumbled to herself. ‘Get me outta here’

 

 

Pulling her carry on behind her, Martyna moved through the sea of people, cocking her head side to side until she saw Maria. Both waving frantically at each other, they pushed threw the crowd until they were close enough to one another to drop the luggage and extend their arms out. They hugged and squealing like school girls. It was so good to see Maria, how Martyna had missed her.

 

 

“Hey Girl! How you been?” Maria said loudly “Aww you look good lady…for an old bag!” She teased

 

 

“Hey, if I remember correctly, _you_ are the older one.” Martyna held her at arms length and smirked, looking her up and down jokingly, “Not bad for over the hill - beotch!” They both laughed, arms around each other they skipped through the terminal; confused on lookers shaking their heads, just like back in the day. ‘Maybe this doesn’t have to be horrible…’ Martyna thought as she flipped off some random douche bag, going on about the behavior of the ‘two old ladies.’

 

 

Maybe…

 

 

Maria and Martyna spent the remainder of the day catching up over lunch and shopping and getting her settled at the apartment. Maria’s daughter and roommate were down south for a week, leaving the apartment vacant - a perfect place for Martyna to stay for the weekend…and find Nevada. This task, according to Maria, should be the easiest part of her trip. “He owns things now – buildings, clubs…he got into real estate years back” Maria was saying “It’s not the same shit, like when you left…” She looked at Martyna and sighed “He went fuckin’ loco when you took off ya know. He was pretty fucked up for a long time. He kept calling me, asking me where you were, if I saw you, where you went…”

 

 

“He didn’t..” Martyna’s chest tightened “Hurt you, did he?”

 

 

“NO!, no, nothing like that..he knew better. Your father would have killed his ass!” Maria chuckled “No, he just bugged and bugged and bugged and one day, he stopped. Just like that. The only thing he ever said to me since was ‘Hi’. After that, I noticed buildings being bought up around town. His men would hang around and guard them if you will. Some nice, some shit, then they were fixed up and rented them. Clubs too… You know, he took a club from a guy who didn’t pay him years ago…when you were still here. That was his first I believe, I think it was right before you left...” Maria pondered this and quickly dismissed it with a wave of her hand. “It doesn’t matter, anyway the point is, if you are looking for him, this is probably where he’ll be. Word is it’s his favorite. I dunno if it’s true…I was there once and never saw him, but it was just once, he could have been anywhere…Do you want me to come with you? I didn’t know what you were thinking for this…I would like too…” Martyna let out a deep breath and grabbed Maria’s hands. “Yes! Yes! please come with me! I’m so nervous... I don’t want to do it alone…”

 

 

“You’re not alone Chiquita, you have me!” Martyna hugged her friend and thanked God for this wonderful woman in her life, she was the best. “Now” Maria began “Lets get dressed and grab a bite before we head to the club. Oh, so you know, I apologize in advance if I puke on the street…and on you” They both broke out laughing. Martyna emptied the second bottle of wine into their glasses and looked out at the New York lights. Not that she would admit it, but she missed them. A lot. She sent a quick text to Sean telling him all is good, and she’ll call him tomorrow. Walking across the kitchen, Martyna grabbed a third bottle of wine and headed toward the spare bedroom to change. She hoped that this bottle would make her hands stop shaking.

 

 

The club was so loud and so crowded Martyna wondered what the hell she was thinking coming here. She looked over at Maria who seemed completely at ease pushing people out of the way to get to the bar. She followed her friend and sidled up beside her, yelling her order to the bartender. He slammed down the vodka tonic in front of her, and she downed the whole glass in one shot, motioning for another. Martyna didn’t see anyone who even remotely resembled Nevada. ‘How am I going to find him if he’s not here’ worry creeped into her mind ‘What the hell am I doing’ Waving her hand at the bartender for another drink, he nodded and brought it over “Keep them coming” she said, not bothering to look at him. Maria looked over and winked at Martyna “Lets dance, come on...” The two made their way to the dance floor, the music ebbed and flowed, and they moved with the rhythm and sound of the bass. It felt good to just let go. Martyna hadn’t been dancing in ages, and she loved how free she felt. The light blue tupelo dress with the open back she wore gently glided over her curves as she swayed.

 

 

When she looked over at Maria, she was yelling something to her and pointing. “What!” Martyna couldn’t hear over the music, and she put her hands up, gesturing she didn’t understand. Maria pointed frantically to the ceiling, mouthing something slowly in hopes she’d pick it up. “What!? I still can’t hear you!” Again, Maria made sweeping gestures, pointing up to the ceiling. Martyna cocked her head and finally looked up.

 

 

She froze. Unable to move.

 

 

There stood Nevada. Watching from above.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	19. Chapter 19

 

 

 

 

There, on the second floor looking down, stood Nevada. He was leaning over the railing with his hands clasped in front of him, and one foot crossed over the other. The sleeves of his dress shirt were rolled up exposing his fore arms, and the black vest covering his chest cast an almost eerie glow over his face. Martyna’s legs felt like wet noodles and her breath became shallow and uneven. She watched him laughing and talking with a large man beside him. She tried to move but couldn’t. All she could do was stare at him. Butterflies rose up from her stomach and she absentmindedly ran her fingers down her neck and throat. “Oh my God, I can’t do this… Shit!” She looked around for Maria, or the bar, or anyone to grab onto – “Where the hell is Maria!” her voice was trembling, she could feel it.

 

 

Standing there in the middle of the dance floor, she _felt_ him – like her entire being ached for him. His eyes were on her, she knew it. The feeling was unmistakable, one she had forgotten about until that moment. Martyna slowly turned her head around and looked up to the second floor. Nevada stood there, staring down at her with a partially open mouth, his eyes wide with disbelief. A few seconds past when the realization of who he was looking at hit him like a punch in the face. He stepped back like he had been pushed hard. Running his hands through his hair, he exhaled forcefully, causing his cheeks to puff out and his face to flush from the neck up.

 

 

Martyna could see him mouthing something, and the man standing beside Nevada looked from him to her, and back again. He never broke eye contact, just stared at her with this look; it was like relief and longing and hope mixed into one. When she turned her body completely around to face him, she was shaking. There was no noise, everything faded…there was just him.

 

 

Nevada slowly backed away from the banister, his eyes never leaving Martyna. He said something to the man beside him, then suddenly tore off in the direction of the stairs. Martyna was snapped out of her daze at his movements and realized he was coming down, for _her._ Startled, she whipped around, trying to push her way between two drunks grinding into the women around them. One of them grabbed her and spun her around. Tripping, Martyna fell into a crowd of people dancing, knocking them backwards and falling on top of a guy in the middle of the dance floor. She squirmed, trying to get off but he held her on top of him “Hey baby, what’s your rush?” The drunk laughed as she fought to pull herself up and off him. “Come on honey, I know you can be good to me. Just give me a little taste…”

 

 

That was as far as the drunk man got. Two large hands wrapped around the lapels of his jacket and a fist came crashing down over and over into his face until blood ran from the open gashes like a river. Nevada threw him down and kicked his sides repeatedly and the man whaled with pain. Picking up his limp body, he rammed his fist into his face again; the sound of bones cracking sent chills to the audience who had circled around the two, and they backed away. Martyna grabbed Nevada’s arm and tried to hold it back. “Nevada! Stop this!” She shook his arm and cried his name _“Nevada! Stooppp!”_ Nevada turned to her, his arm up and hand clenched in a fist, chest heaving and mouth open. Blood oozed from his knuckles, and he stared at her. Martyna slowly ran her hand up his arm, gently taking his injured hand in hers and held it, lowering it down. She looked down at the blood and knew it was bad. Looking up to say something, her words were lost when she saw how he was looking at her. His eyes burrowed into hers and she let them; let him in. It was too late to deny anything now. He was the one – _her_ one. Nevada’s eyes pleaded with her. They were gentle, and helpless, and hers. All the feelings she thought were just memories came back so intensely that tears ran down her cheeks and she was powerless to stop them. Martyna held his hand and brought it up to her mouth and kissed it softly; a feeling so sweet Nevada felt his knees start to give way. She led him slowly away and he walked over the unconscious drunk, eyes never leaving her for a moment. Nevada stood in front of her, memorizing every detail of her face. He felt like he was in heaven. She was taking to him but he heard nothing, he could only stare in utter disbelief and sheer joy. She was back. Nothing mattered now but her.

 

 

“Nevada? We have to clean this out – where’s the washroom?” He pointed left and they began walking carefully past the bar, their eyes never leaving each other. Martyna’s stomach fluttered at his touch, and she felt she could melt right into him forever.

 

 

“Your dress” Nevada looked at the crimson stains on the light blue.

 

 

“What?”

 

 

“Your dress is covered in my blood.” Martyna looked at her dress and shrugged, nothing she could do about it now – not that she cared. She was with him. Fuck the blood.

 

 

“It’ll be fine. Where’s the washroom?”

 

 

“Upstairs.” Nevada led Martyna up the cast iron staircase, careful not to rush despite his wounds needing attention. He stared at her face as she walked. ‘So beautiful’ he thought. After all these years, and all the countless women, she was still the most gorgeous thing he had ever laid eyes on.

 

 

He stood to the side of the vanity while Martyna washed out the gashes on his hand. He studied her face as she contemplated weather the deep cuts needed stiches or not. He loved the way she bit her lip when she was thinking, same as she did some twenty years before. ‘Funny what you remember’ Nevada smirked at the thought.

 

 

“What?” Martyna questioned the look, but he just shrugged. She sighed and looked down again at his hand. She had not cleaned a fight wound out for years and couldn’t believe she remembered what to do. The last one she nursed better was her son’s in the tenth grade after he pounded a guy for hitting on his then girlfriend. ‘So much like him’ she mused ‘Fuck…’

 

Truth be told, she liked what just happened - liked that Nevada beat the snot outta that asshole. For her. Because he was touching her, because she was _his_. And the thought scared her, a lot. Not that she would admit it, but it turned her on too – way more then she cared to accept.

 

 

 

 


	20. Chapter 20

 

 

“Where’d you go?” Nevada looked over at Martyna from across the bar in his office. Sitting with her feet up, she was dressed in one of his shirts while his men took her dress to the drycleaners. She looked absolutely delicious in his dress shirt – baggy and loose and sliding off her shoulder, short enough to expose her long, toned legs…how he missed them wrapped around his waist. He fought the urge to let his mind wonder to other, more intimate things he longed to do with her again.

 

 

He had to focus. He was pissed, had been for years. No one leaves him. No one. But she did. For twenty plus years she was gone with no communication – nothing about…about a baby. Nevada felt a ball of anger and hate rise up in his body as he thought about twenty years of nothing then, suddenly, _boom!_. There she is. Dancing in his fucking club, drinking his fucking liquor, making him fucking _feel_ again. ‘Who the fuck does she think she is?’ He gripped the tumbler full of scotch so tight it began to shake. Nevada could feel the flush of anger fill his face.

 

 

Martyna looked over at him and slowly stood up, her eyes never leaving him. ‘Fuck’ she thought as her eyes went from the trembling glass, back to his face. Unsure of what he might do, Martyna carefully made her way around the sofa so she was standing at the back of it. Noticing a door adjacent to where she was, she began heading slowly in that direction. Nevada’s eyes dug into hers and his lips curled under his teeth. “Where the fuck do you think your going?” His voice hard and cold and Martyna shivered at the sound. His hand squeezed the glass so hard that it broke, sending shards across the bar. Nevada pushed the broken glass on the floor and marched toward Martyna who had now fled to the door, trying desperately to open it. Blood dripped steadily from his other hand as he went to grab her. She ducked and ran back to the sofa. They shimmied back and forth, both on opposite sides of it. He tried to grab her again and missed.

 

 

“ _Who the fuck do you think you are! Do you think you can just come back whenever the fuck you want too? Just show up cause it suits you at the time?”_ He was furious, the veins on his face budged and pulsated. _“DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME!!!”_

 

 

As the tears ran down his face Martyna stopped moving, and stared at him, stared at those beautiful eyes. All these years that have pasted, she never thought it was real, it was true, that he gave a shit, she was just a nice piece of ass. But he did, he did care. This was real, the real man behind the drugs, and the guns, and the bullshit. Here he was, crying in front of her and not trying to hide it. He was vulnerable. And for whatever reason trusted her with this vulnerability. He was pouring his heart out the only way he knew how to so she could see him for all he really was.

 

 

“Nevada…I” Martyna tried to speak but her words got stuck in her throat. She could feel her eyes brimming with tears. “I had no choice…the way we were, the shit, the lifestyle…” She wiped her runny nose on her arm and sobbed in front of him. “You went crazy. I…I couldn’t stay…” Her voice was coming out now in quick, short spurts. Neither of them moved. Nevada rested his hands on the top of the couch with his head down. He spoke without looking up.

 

 

“I found it you know” His voice was flat. He looked up at her and sighed, he hated to see her cry.

 

 

“Found what?” Martyna sniffled

 

 

“The pregnancy test. I found it in the garbage… It was positive.” He looked over at her, her eyes were wide, but there was something else there as well – a kind, gentle, loving look he didn’t have a name for. “Don’t think I don’t know why you left – I knew.” His voice was soft and made Martyna’s heart ache for him. “I didn’t bother asking your father, and Maria wouldn’t tell me. I had no idea where you were, you just vanished.” He confessed “And I hated you for it, for a long time.” Nevada walked around the sofa and motioned Martyna to sit with an open hand. She sat close to him and took his other hand in hers. The abrasions were small and had already stopped bleeding. She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed his wounds. Looking at him now, twenty plus years after the fact, he still gave her butterflies. Nevada’s bandaged hand reached out and caressed Martyna’s cheek, causing her to tear up again.

 

 

“I have to know.” He asked seriously “Did you lose the baby because of me?” He had waited a lifetime to ask that one question. If he was the cause, he decided he deserved no happiness at all in his life. Martyna cocked her head to the side at the question, then smirked a little. “Nevada, why do you think that?” He looked down at the carpet. “I hurt you. I…. I hurt you, badly. I know this” He looked up and took her hands in his “Martyna, I’m not the same person as I was. I was a boy then, a fuckin’ idiota. A stupid, selfish, narcissistic boy. I have changed, my life has changed. I wanted you to know that…that I’m sorry” He was still looking down at the carpet when she asked him “You saw the positive sign on the test, why would you think I lost the baby?” Nevada froze for a moment. He looked up from the carpet with a questioning expression on his face. It took him a second to realize what that statement meant, and his eyes went wide. Martyna smiled at him and reached in her purse for her phone. She scrolled through her most recent photos and tapped it. Taking a deep breath, she handed Nevada the phone and waited.

 

 

There, before him, he saw a young man. He had wavy, dark brown, shaggy hair and bright green eyes. He was smiling and hugging a woman beside him. The woman was Martyna. Nevada ran his fingers over the screen as if to touch the young man’s face. He scrolled through more photos and saw the young man in various settings, laughing and happy. An enormous smile took over most of Nevada’s face and small tears ran down his cheeks as he looked at all the photos. Martyna’s words were soft when she spoke

 

 

“He’s your son, Nevada. His name is Sean.” Martyna waited and watched, eyes filling with tears. She swallowed hard and continued. “I came here to find you” She began crying “Because he wants to meet you…I had to know it was different!” She wailed, and her voice cracked with every word, but she didn’t care “I had to know you weren’t the same as when I left…I worked my ass off to make sure he would not end up like you” Martyna’s voice began to raise in anger and she stood up in front of him. “ _I made sure_ _he was safe!, I made sure he was loved and raised well – to be a good person, a decent human being! To_ _succeed on his own terms! I kept him away…it’s no life for a boy!”_ Martyna was a sobbing mess and Nevada had to catch her as she began to fall to the floor. He held her while she cried, and said nothing. The mixture of liquor, and stress, and anxiety of this moment had all come to a head, and she broke down. Nevada didn’t give two fucks though. She was immaculate to him, the mother of his son. She was his – _his one_. There was no doubt in his mind. He had a son ‘My son’ The thought made his insides almost burst. A child, his own flesh and blood. He held Martyna tightly but couldn’t help but smile. Just the thought of meeting him was enough to make the last twenty years bearable.

 

 

Small snoring noises came from his arms, and he lifted Martyna to the couch, careful not to wake her. He put his suit jacket over her and a pillow under her head. Sitting at her feet, he rubbed his eyes. Had anyone said to him that day that his life would be turned upside down before midnight, he would have punched them in the face just for saying something so fuckin’ stupid.

 

 

But here he was. And there was no place on earth he would rather be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	21. Chapter 21

 

 

****

Martyna awoke in Maria’s daughters apartment with a pounding head ache and a face full of dry, smeared mascara. On the table beside the bed there was a bottle of Advil and a large glass of water. She popped three and slowly sipped the water as not to make herself sick. Laying back down she ran through the nights events in her mind. The thought of Nevada caused a huge smile to spread across her face and she silently scolded herself for it. Of all the men she had known, weather she dated them, slept with them, or were just friends with them, Nevada was the only man that ever made her feel _that_ way. That way when you’re a grown woman and you feel like your knees are going to give way because he’s close to you. The way butterflies rush through your body when he touches you, the way you feel completely whole – with him, and only him. The way she never felt with anyone else.

 

 

Martyna never believed in the concept of soulmates, or twin souls, or whatever the hell the trendiest word for it was now. She thought it was all rubbish, something someone had made up to sell to desperate people at the end of their ropes, looking for love. But she couldn’t deny that even after twenty plus years apart, she felt like a missing piece of herself was found, that she was complete. Only with him. ‘It is what it is’ Martyna thought lazily rolling out of bed. ‘Must be meant to be.’ She picked up her phone and texted Sean that she would call as soon as she was out of the shower. ‘This should be an interesting conversation’ She hoped Sean would understand why she had lied to him regarding where she was going and what she was doing. Martyna believed he would, he was wise beyond his years, even as a child. Stepping into the hot shower she let her mind wonder, careful not to think to much about the impending phone call.

 

 

Sean took it well enough Martyna thought, considering all she told him, Sean took it in stride (a trait clearly not inherited from his Father). He was hesitant, then quiet, then – was it excitement she heard in his voice? She couldn’t tell for sure. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on her part. Regardless, Sean would have the opportunity to ask everything he needed to, and wanted to, to get to know this man he had never met in about five hours. In five hours his plane would land, and she hadn’t yet told Nevada that he was on his way. Sitting in the kitchen of the apartment Martyna finished her coffee and text Maria that Sean was leaving that afternoon. Maria left a note on the counter saying she was out getting a whole lotta greasy food to combat the hang overs both were recovering from. ‘Thank God’ Martyna thought with a smile.

 

 

A knock at the door sent Martyna running for the food. She flung open the door, only to find it wasn’t Maria, but Nevada. He was holding a delicious smelling bag, behind him stood one of his men. She gasped and took a few steps back, somewhat embarrassed of last night. Surprised to see him, she moved behind the door and smiled while looking at the floor.

 

 

“Can I come in?” Nevada’s voice was horse but kind. He looked good – very good. She was still in her robe from the shower with a towel wrapped around her head, she hadn’t even brushed her teeth yet. She tried not to breath on him when she spoke. She wasn’t ready for this, to see him. She had a plan, to tell him Sean was coming, later when she got her shit together, when she wasn’t in a towel… this wasn’t it. Shit. Martyna opened the door, still trying to hide behind it, and let Nevada in. They didn’t say much as they made their way to the kitchen, walking behind him, she quickly moved to the breakfast bar and stood behind there. He let out a laugh “What do you think I’m going to do?” He smiled and unloaded the bag, she was almost drooling. “Nothing I…” Martyna’s phone buzzed and cut her off, it was a text from Maria:

 

_Thought you two could use some alone time wink wink. Seriously let me know how it goes…no rush, I’m at the bodega right across from the apartment…breakfast with Sally from work. If you need me I’m here xo_

 

Nevada plated their food and they stood at the counter eating in silence. Martyna didn’t look up but she could feel him looking at her. Her stomach began to tighten, and she fussed with a napkin in front of her plate nervously. She looked up to find him staring at her, and it took her breath away. They stared at each other for a long time before she spoke.

 

 

“Nevada” Martyna ran her hand across her neck “Look, I have to tell you something. But you must promise me that after I say what I have to say, that you and I have a conversation regarding how it will play out OK? This is very important, and it can _not_ be fucked up in any way, shape or form… Oh fuck it…” She threw her arms up in the air “I can’t do this calm shit...He’s coming here today – Sean – is flying in today. He’ll be leaving Pearson in 3 hours, I think...” Martyna was rambling now but she couldn’t help herself “So he’ll be here in about five hours, maybe less now, to meet you. I told him this morning, I didn’t tell him why I left when I did leave, but I did this morning when I was talking to him and…”

 

 

Nevada stepped around the counter, grabbing Martyna by her waist and pulling her flush to him, he kissed her - hard. An erotic mix of tongues and teeth crashing into each other, their hands all over one another’s bodies. Every touch was electric, every nerve pulsed from within and it felt like fire. Bolts of pleasure shot through each of them as they moaned loudly at the unbelievable sensations. Their bodies knew they belonged to each other, their souls knew they belonged to each other, and when they touched it was like an explosion of passion and need that was twenty years in the making. The desire they felt for each other was almost unbearable, and they clawed and pulled at one another trying to get impossibly closer.

 

 

Nevada ripped Martyna’s house coat off exposing her naked body to him. The sight of her made his cock ache to be inside her and he could feel himself leaking. She stood there in front of him; chest heaving, lips parted and panting for him - all for him. Nevada watched her wetness glisten on her thighs and he couldn’t stand it anymore. He ran his hand across the small table, knocking all it’s contents to the floor and pushed her down on it. Martyna pulled and yanked at his pants until they were undone, and she pulled out his cock, hungrily sucking and licking while he moaned above her. She couldn’t get enough of him – moaning and saying his name she was driving him fucking crazy. Her tongue slid down the underside of his length and back up. Sucking hard on the head, she switched from sucking to licking all over him. Martyna kissed and sucked down his cock and tongued his balls and he shivered. She licked all the way back up to the head and took him all in until she was chocking. He grabbed her hair and thrust himself deeper into her mouth and she moaned, tears running down her face. _“Fuck yes”_ he hissed at the pleasure and pulled her off before he came. Nevada lifted Martyna’s naked body up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He sat her down on the counter, kissing her like he was dying. He sucked on her neck hard leaving a bruise and licked down her body, attacking her breasts. She yelped, then moaned and could feel in between her legs dripping for him, wanting him. His tongue ran down the length of her body, grounding his face in her swollen middle and she screamed above him. His tongue ran circles around her clit and he sucked on her tiny piece of flesh. Martyna was shaking and covering her face. It felt so good she didn’t think she could stand it for much longer. Nevada licked upwards with large swipes of his tongue and she begged him to make her come. The intensity – it was too much. She tasted so good, he didn’t want to stop. She pulled him up and he gazed at her through her open legs. She was so fucking beautiful, like no woman he had ever seen. Her eyes were half closed, she was calling his name and her legs were wide apart, spread for him. Nevada looked at her wetness and dug in once more with his mouth, making her cry out and squirm. He lifted his head and she pulled him to her and thrust her tongue in his mouth, tasting her pleasure on it and moaning. _“I want you inside me”_ Martyna’s words were low and breathy and it made Nevada’s cock twitch. He yanked a condom from the pocket of his pants on the floor, fumbling trying to get it open and Martyna smacked it out of his hand and kissed him. Her breath was coming out in gasps and moans _“I just_ _want you, just you”_ He thrust his cock inside her so hard and so fast she screamed. He stretched her out and filled her up so much it was beyond description. She felt weak as he fucked her, her head banging of the backsplash. He was taking her all for himself and he didn’t care. She was his, and he wanted her, and he couldn’t stop. She screamed and begged him to fuck her harder. He thrust and pounded inside her until he came, hard, calling her name. She came apart under him yelling and sobbing and moaning, her spent body weak and shaking. She loved it.

 

 

They looked at each other with loving eyes, and Martyna caressed his stubble with her hands while he softened inside her. Their noses nudged as soft, gentle kisses were placed all over one another’s faces. Nevada took her face in his hands and kissed her long and soft. There was no one else in the world but them. They were one.

 

 

“Umm, is it ok to come in now?!” It was Maria. They stopped moving for a minute and Martyna’s face fell. “We, um, heard some noises, and decided to wait in the hall!” Giggles and muffled laughter came from Maria and Nevada’s men on the other side of the door, and Martyna turned about fifty different shades of red. Nevada smirked, and a smug grin made its way across his face. He looked almost proud. Martyna was mortified.

 

 

They looked at each other and broke out laughing. Shit

 

 

 

 

 


	22. Chapter 22

 

 

 

 

Martyna waited for Sean to come through Terminal C. She felt a mixture of excitement and worry, wondering how all this was going to play out – meeting Nevada. She paced and fidgeted with her purse strap, rubbing some invisible dirt of her clean clothes when she saw him.

 

 

“Sean!” He looked up and gave his Mother a big smile, waving to her as he grabbed his tote and shoulder bag.

 

 

“Hi!” He said, hugging his Mom hello. Martyna wrapped her arms around her son and held him tight. Throwing his luggage over his back, he looked around “Where’s Maria? Didn’t she drive you here?” He looked over Martyna’s shoulders and to where Maria was in line “Is he here?”

 

 

“Marias getting us coffee over there” and she pointed to the long line at leading into the coffee shop “And no,” She looked down “Nevada isn’t here.” Martyna looked up to see her son smirking at her. The exact same smirk that fell across Nevada’s face after they were ‘caught’ in the apartment. She never realized just how much they resembled each other until her son stood right in front of her giving the same look. It was almost eerie. “I thought it would be best if you and I talked a bit before you two met – he’ll be coming over to the apartment later tonight…” Her voice trailed off as Maria brought the tray of coffee to them

 

 

“Hey kiddo!” Maria grabbed his face and placed a kiss on both cheeks. “Look at you! Not much of a kid anymore huh…” She turned to Martyna and silently mouthed the words ‘Oh my God!’ and she knew exactly what Maria was referring to: He was the spitting image of his father, except twenty plus years younger. “You look good kiddo – hey, did you get the card I sent you for your birthday?” Maria divvied up the coffee as her and Sean talked about how the flight was and if he barfed from the food.

 

 

Martyna looked at her son and smiled. What an amazing young man he was, so kind and confident - he just loved life. She prayed that this meeting would not have heavy ramifications for his future - that he kept his head, that Nevada didn’t try to tempt him with any easy money bullshit, or anything else. Nevada had changed, this she sensed – grew, matured into an older man, a better man. A man she had such deep feelings for they frightened her. The time they spent together in the apartment was the most intensely passionate union she had had since her younger years with him. No man since had ever made her feel the way he did – inside and out.

 

 

“Mom? You ok?” Sean looked at Martyna cocking his head to the side and smiling “Looks like your off in never- never land there…”

 

 

“Oh” She chuckled “Kinda was… you ready now?”

 

 

“Yep, I just wanna get a panzerotti from that pizza place over there before we leave – starving!” Sean walked over and stood in line. Maria elbowed Martyna and gestured with her head to look at her son. He hadn’t been in line no more then two minutes when a couple of girls started chatting him up and flirting with him. She rolled her eyes and shot Maria a look. Not that she cared, Maria just giggled. “Look at your boy – quite the lady’s man. Reminds me of another certain someone…” Martyna slapped her arm “Just sayin’ is all” The two ladies started laughing and Sean looked over at them with a curious ‘ _what the fuck’_ look on his face, causing them to laugh even more.

 

 

Martyna had no idea what to expect when Nevada met Sean at the apartment later that night. There were so many situations were flying through her head, so many different scenarios…the entire thing was exhausting. ‘And then what?’ she thought ‘Where could this possibly go? With me? with Sean? We live in different countries for Christ sake…fuck’ Her inner dialog was driving her crazy, but she couldn’t ignore the validity of the questions. Where was this going? Sighing, Martyna glanced at her friend and Maria could almost sense her worry. “Marty, don’t worry about this ok. Listen, Sean is too smart to be pulled into any shit – you know that. And you probably refuse to see it, knowing you” Maria poked Martyna in the arm “but Nevada loves you, do you know that? Everyone can see it, I can, his men can - everyone. He would never do anything to fuck this up again. He’s not a stupid man Marty. He spent over twenty years working out his own karma, which was no doubt fucking awful. Did you ever ask yourself why he never married or started a family? Its certainly not the money, and the way woman throw themselves at him, he could have had anyone, at anytime, anywhere. But he didn’t. He didn’t want to. Know why? ‘Cause he was waiting for you. All these years he waited – for you.” Martyna stared blankly at Maria “So lighten up beotch, I drank _way_ too much last night for this feely kinda conversation. I’m amazed I’m still standing…”

 

 

‘Love’ Martyna pondered what was just said to her. The word had never been said regarding the two of them. She didn’t allow her mind to venture into that territory. _That_ territory was an island of complications piled high with a ton of bullshit. Up shit creek without a paddle came to mind and she sort of smiled at the analogy. But Maria just said it, like it was completely natural, like it was common knowledge. Was it? Martyna knew he was her one, but she thought it was, well, private, more between the two of them. For whatever reason she felt surprised at the spoken words – like it made what was buried deep inside her public, it changed everything for her, and she couldn’t figure out why. It was just different now, real. She felt different now _…_

 

 

“Mom? Hello? Are you going to join us?” Sean stood in front of Martyna waving his hands chuckling. She slapped at him and he put his arm around her as the three of them walked out of the airport. She hoped he didn’t notice the nervousness on her face. And the flush.

 

 

Love

 

 

A heartfelt smile crossed her face and she giggled stupidly to herself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	23. Chapter 23

 

 

When they got back to the apartment Martyna placed the groceries they had picked up on the counter and began preparing the food. When she was upset or nervous, she either cooked food she grew up with, or cleaned fanatically. Tonight, she was doing both, and her behavior wasn’t lost on her son.

 

 

Sean stared at his Mother while wiping down the table and wondered if he should have just looked for Nevada himself. He wasn’t sure how tonight would play out, and he wondered what he would think looking back on tonight, tomorrow morning. ‘Whatever’s going to happen, it’s all in how I react to what’s going on – good or bad’ Sean knew that was all the control he really had over the situation and planned to take full advantage of it.

 

 

From the first time his Mom told him about his father, he wanted to meet him – to know who he was. Sean had seen pictures of him when him and his Mom were together, and the likeness was undeniable. They looked almost exactly the same, except Sean was tall, six plus feet to Nevada’s shorter stature. He towered over his Mom’s five-foot three frame, and she said he inherited his height from her Dad. He was apparently about the same size before his age and diseases shrunk him like a deflating balloon.

 

 

He wondered what Nevada sounded like, what his favorite food was, what he did now…was it the same shit as before? Had he left it behind? Did he know about him? Were there other kids from different women? Would he even show up? Sean wanted to know what kind of a person he was. He also wanted to beat the fuck out of him at the same time for being such a general shit heel in life. Martyna warned him to keep his temper in check, as she could see Nevada in him that way as well. When she told Sean how it was back then, it was like fiction to him, something out of a movie or a book. The thought of that much violence and disregard for anything and everything was completely foreign to him, he couldn’t wrap his head around it. ‘He was my age when all that shit happened’ Sean thought, still wiping the same spot on the table ‘He was twenty four… Fuck do I really want to meet this guy?’ He tried not to second guess himself, but it nagged him at the back of his mind. Maybe he idealized this meeting so much he had lost sight of the very real possibility that Nevada may be someone he doesn’t want to know, or want in his life, or vise versa. Sean rubbed his eyes, ‘Fuck me’ he muttered to himself as he sat at the kitchen table wondering how tonight would go.

 

 

“Sean…I wanted to talk to you about…shit is that the time?! He’ll be here any minute! God Damnit…” Martyna felt a tinge of panic rise from her guts and she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Never mind… I want to tell you that if you’ve had enough, or you’re not feelin’ it or whatever just let me know” “Mom, I got it – relax” Sean was on edge to begin with and his Mom wasn’t helping. “How fuckin’ awkward is this” he growled under his breath but loud enough for Martyna to hear. She shot him a look, resting her arm on the counter. “For what its worth, he’s not the same man I left. I can feel it. Does that make sense? I just wanted to let you know that…” She was cut short by a knock at the door and both froze for a moment, staring at each other. “Ok” Martyna swallowed hard and clasp her hands in front of her. She looked at Sean leaning with his back side on the table and his arms crossed, one foot over the other. Just like him _._ She slowly made her way to the door. With her hand on the door knob she looked back at Sean, he looked at her and nodded, and she opened the door to the apartment wide.

 

 

Nevada stood at the threshold of the door, alone. None of his men graced the hallway of Maria’s daughter’s apartment. It was just him, by himself. It emanated a different vibe – Martyna liked it. She smiled at him as she looked him over. Dressed in a grey and black plaid jacket, white dress shirt with black tapered pants and black shoes. She guessed his outfit probably cost more then her Yukon and it made her smile a bit more. Damn he looked good. Martyna hoped it didn’t show on her face, but under different circumstances, if he wanted to take her right there, she would have let him.

 

 

“Hi” Nevada’s voice was flat and his eyes burned into Martynas. She knew the nervousness he was feeling had nothing to do with her – but she was in front of him, thus receiving the brunt of it. It didn’t surprise her in the least. “For you” Nevada handed her a bouquet of Iris’, her favorite flower, and a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon.

 

 

“Thank you, I love Iris’” Martyna looked at him through her long lashes making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

 

 

“I know. Recuerdo todo sobre ti, mi amor. He estado pensando en ti durante años. ( _I remember everything_ _about you my love. I’ve been thinking about you for years.)_ Martyna felt the blush take over her face and she looked away as she stepped aside to let him in. He could get her blushing with that talk, every time. “Please come in…”

 

 

Nevada entered the apartment and looked around, he didn’t see anyone. Looking at Martyna, she motioned him toward the living room to sit. “Drink?” she asked making her way to the kitchen “Later” he answered. Martyna come out with a plate of homemade hors d’oeuvres and napkins. “You always cooked when you were nervous” Martyna smiled and put the plate on the ottoman between them. She sat down and looked up to see him staring at her. She took a deep breath “Nevada I want you to know that…”

 

 

“So this is Nevada.” Sean come out of the kitchen, startling them both. Nevada stood up as Sean walked around the couch and over to him. He extended his hand out and Nevada took it – this was not what he expected. He was expecting a smug kid, trying to be tough and giving him attitude; Being an asshole and going on, immediately upon meeting him, about the shit he put his Mother through way back when, pouting even with his arms crossed. But this didn’t happen. He did not prepare himself for a reasonable reaction from this young man, and it made him naturally suspicious of the kid’s intentions.

 

 

“Sean” He said simply.

 

 

“Nevada”

 

 

Sean sat on the chair in between them and helped himself to the food. He looked up and moved the plate in Nevada’s direction, and he declined with a shake of his hand. He couldn’t believe he was sitting here, with him, with his son. He just stared at Sean, he couldn’t believe how much they looked alike – it was like looking at himself years ago. Sean was tall, much taller then he was, and Nevada thought it must be from Martyna’s Dad who was easily 6’2” – and just as round.

 

 

Looking at Sean was like looking in his own eyes. All the sudden, he didn’t know what to do. Sitting on the sofa his words were lost. The feeling was completely foreign to him – he _always_ knew what to do, regardless of the situation. But the boys demeanor had caught him off guard, fucked up his initial plan of reaction. Asshole he could deal with, but he was not, at present moment, an asshole. Nevada shifted in his seat. Here he sat, with the woman he desperately wanted back and the son he never knew he had, whom he really wanted to get to know so…so…what now. ‘Fuck’ Nevada gauged the state of the meeting from a perspective he hadn’t considered before. Perhaps all the boy wanted was to meet him and that would be it – no contact, except maybe at Christmas or birthdays. Or, maybe, Sean wanted to know him, in the same way he did. The cool, calm demeanor of his face hid the storm of emotions running through his body.

 

 

“Can I still get that drink amor?” He smiled at Martyna and she nodded, making her way to the kitchen. She looked at Sean and he replied “Just a beer for me Mom, thanks” Sean looked over at Nevada and relaxed back in the chair before he spoke.

 

 

“You know we’re leaving Monday for home” He said fidgeting with his finger nails. “To be honest, I thought I’d have all these questions for you but…I don’t have any, at least not right now. This was all me” Sean made a circle with his finger to encompass the people in the apartment. “I initiated this – not her. I wanted to meet you.” He said it with conviction as to let Nevada know his Mom had nothing to do with it.

 

 

“And now you have” Nevada said, and regretted the tone immediately.

 

 

“Yep” Sean smirked” I guess I have” looking directly at Nevada.

 

 

Fuck that wasn’t supposed to happen, it’s not what he wanted. What did he mean they were leaving Monday? She never told him that, not to his surprise…He had to get them to stay, he had to prove to his son he wasn’t the same person his Mom had obviously filled him in on. That smug comment didn’t help. ‘God damnit’ Nevada racked his mind for something to remedy the situation.

 

 

“Sean, you may not have any questions for me, but I do have questions for you. I would like to try to get to know you a bit, if that is something your interested in…” Nevada’s heart ponded in his chest and he held his breath, waiting for an answer. Sean looked at him hard. Nevada felt what others in his shoes were feeling when he did the same to them. He could respect this kid for that. Impressive. He leaned back on the couch and smiled. Was that pride he felt?

 

 

“I could do that” Sean said, shoving a cracker and cheese in his mouth “What did you have in mind?”

 

 

Martyna came out with the drinks and stopped dead. They were talking. More then that, they weren’t yelling, and if it hadn’t started by now, it most likely wouldn’t. She felt some of the tension leave her shoulders, and she wondered where this night would end up. Lost in thought, Martyna didn’t notice the two men staring at her. “Something wrong?” Sean said, and Nevada smiled. ‘Wrong?’ She thought sarcastically ‘No what could possibly be wrong here’ She sighed. “Nope, nothing. Here’s your drinks” Martyna handed them out and went back in the kitchen to pour herself a glass of the wine Nevada brought. “

 

 

“What the fuck is going on” Martyna muttered to herself, downing the glass of wine and pouring another one. She realized that she has been saying that non-stop since she arrived back in New York.

 

 

“What _is_ going on here?” She poured her third glass and looked out the window at the night lights, hoping, just hoping everything would be ok. It had to be. Because she wasn’t sure she had it in her anymore to deal with anything other then that when it came to Nevada.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	24. Chapter 24

 

 

 

“What the fuck do you mean your leaving Monday – that’s tomorrow” Nevada’s nostrils flared and he pushed his coat off his hips to rest his hands there. He shook his head from side to side “No, no…you’re not going _anywhere_.” His voice was low and deadly, sending a chill down Martyna’s spine. She didn’t look at him. She just picked through the flowers at the corner store, ignoring him as he glared at her. Two of his men came up to him as he stood there huffing at Martynas defiance, taking his attention away from her. ‘Thank God’ she whispered, grateful for the distraction. Her mind wondered to the morning as she debated over which flowers to choose. His breakfast with Sean seemed to go well, according to Sean. Nevada didn’t bring it up yet, except for the fact they were leaving. She wondered if he would at all…

 

 

She thought back to the morning conversation with him, and his meeting with Nevada over breakfast. She picked through the lilies and daisy’s as she mulled it over.

 

 

_“How’d it go?” She asked when Sean returned to the apartment as she was getting ready to leave to meet Nevada herself; not really wanting to hear anything but good news. “Good.” He sounded a bit surprised “He’s not what I thought”. Sean’s reply intrigued Martyna, and she very much wanted to pry in his business. “Oh” trying too hard to sound non chalant, “how do you mean?” she put her purse down on the counter, giving Sean her full attention. “I dunno he’s just, not what I thought. I thought I’d be listening to some random talk about nothing, his lifestyle or whatever. But he is actually a very intelligent guy. We discussed real-estate, properties, holdings – that’s apparently where he focuses most of his energy now-a-days, according to him.” Sean rummaged through the fridge as he spoke “but he was more interested in you and I then talking about himself. He asked a lot of questions…where we lived, what you did for a living, if I went to university, where I worked, if you had ever been married, if you were seeing anyone, if I wanted to stay in New York…” Martyna’s blood began to boil ‘Oh no he did not ask my son that question’ It was entrapment, plain and simple. If he could get Sean to want to stay, he knew damn well she wouldn’t let him stay here alone, with him. ‘That son of a bitch’ She questioned how she could be surprised at this shit - his shit. Sean looked at his watch, “Aren’t you supposed to meet him now?” She nodded and kissed him good bye, grinding her teeth as she left._

 

 

“Martyna? Martyna I have to go – business. We will talk about this tonight” He talked _at_ her like she was a child, it was infuriating. Martyna turned to him, shifting her weight on her left side and crossing her arms in front of her. He knew she was mad. “Talk about what, exactly, Nevada? That I’m not going _anywhere_ ” Her voice mocked him sending sparks of anger coursing through his veins “And who the fuck are you to tell me that?” She stepped closer to him and he could see the fire in her eyes. “I can do _whatever_ the hell I want to do. At any time, whenever _I_ choose to do it! I have a life back home you know…work, friends, a house to pay for! Did you think I’d just say fuck it to everything and stay here? Throw everything I worked so hard for out the window… For what – for _you!_ ” She spat the last word at him like he was a monster, and he felt the sting of rejection in his chest. Rage bubbled up from Nevada’s guts and his knuckles were turning white from the pressure of his hands balled up in to fists. People started crossing the street and the store owner went inside, locking the door.

 

 

“Watch you’re mouth” He stepped closer to her. All he saw was red.

 

 

“I will not watch my mouth! What was that comment you threw at Sean this morning? ‘ _Do you want to stay in New_ _York?_ ’ You know God damn well I would never allow him here with you, alone. So what was the mindset behind the comment Nevada, he stays and she follows? So you can _have_ me, is that it? You’re pushing fifty years of age for Christ sakes – when does this shit end with you!?” Martyna screamed in pure frustration.

 

 

“Shut your fucking mouth _NOW_!” Nevada grabbed Martyna and rammed her up against the outside of the building, hitting her head off the shelf hard, spilling fresh fruit and flowers everywhere. She kicked at him and scratched at his face. He let her go suddenly, and she dropped to the ground, coughing and holding her head in pain. He stood over her, staring down at her with the same emotionless eyes he had years ago; before leaving her on the cold concrete floor of the restaurants back room.

 

 

But that was then.

 

 

Martyna grabbed the crotch of his pants and squeezed as hard as she could and Nevada buckled over and cursed in pain. She tried to run but he caught her leg and flipped her over. She squirmed one leg free and kicked him in the face, hard, and he went flying backwards. Blood ran down his nose and he marched over to her, jerking her to him roughly she cried out, trying to push him away. He dragged her over to where the two men waited by his SUV, looking around cautiously for the cops “Open the fucking door” Nevada barked the order and the man closest to the door swung it open. Nevada pushed her in and over to the other side. Martyna reached for the handle and opened the passenger door, almost escaping. Nevada grabbed her by the hair, yanking her back in the SUV and she winced in pain. He shoved her arms behind her back and pushed her down so Martyna lay across the back seat with his weight half way on her body to hold her there. He slammed the door and yelled for the men to go.

 

 

“Fuck you Nevada, get off me! Pieprzony dupek! _(fucking asshole!)_ Nevada let her up and she scurried to the opposite side of the SUV, gently rubbing her head and looking over her arm where a large bruise was forming. She crossed her legs and took note of the scratches on them. The skirt she had just bought ruined. She looked over at Nevada, he was fuming mad. His chest puffed in and out and his lip twisted under his gum line. He shot daggers from his eyes in Martynas direction and she noticed his eyes had changed. She saw remorse in them, hurt and anger. But the remorse, she had never seen this in his eyes before, and she knew he could have done much worse to her…but, he didn’t. There was restraint, something that was completely non-existent in his younger years. He rubbed his eyes and ran his hand down his jaw, carefully controlling the anger in his voice when he spoke.

 

 

“You will never pull that shit again with me. Understand? Me entiendes? ( _Do you understand me?)_ Nevada moved closer to Martyna “Do you understand me?!” She looked away and he grabbed her jaw, turning her face to his. She stared straight into his eyes and he let go of her. He rested back on the leather seat and stared downward for a long minute before he spoke.

 

 

“There is more to me then what you assume Martyna. I am not a stupid man, nor am I a thug – not anymore. How would you know anything about me? You never asked. How would you know what my business is? You’ve been gone for years. You come back and tell me I have a son who is now a grown man. Did you think it was beyond me how much time I have lost with him? With you?…I missed his entire childhood. It is also not lost on me why you left to raise him alone, so whatever shit you believe has not ended, I assure you, it ended years ago.” Martyna’s eyes brimmed with tears and she smiled a small smile at him. She reached out and took his hand in hers. She wanted to say a million things at once, but all she could do was cry. She loved him. God help her, but she did. With every ounce of her being, she loved him. He looked at her with honest eyes and she knew what he said was true. Martyna threw her arms around his neck, and he held her close. She had to tell him - right now.

 

 

“Nevada I love…”

 

 

She never got a chance to finish.

 

 

Bullets peppered the SUV from the outside, one after the other like popcorn, the noise was deafening. They were hit on the left side viciously, lifting their bodies up and slamming them into the far right of the vehicle. It flipped over and over, throwing them around inside like paper. Nevada reached his hand out for Martyna…

 

 

Blackness

 

 

When Martyna awoke in the hospital, she was in braces and bandages. Doctors were speaking to her, but it sounded, muffled - distant. Her vision was blurry, and she hurt. She saw Sean and tried to speak, then she drifted off again.

 

 

Nevada lay in a bed in the ICU. Tubes and IV’s littered his broken body, the machine that was breathing for him beeped and hummed with every pump…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	25. Chapter 25

 

 

Sean helped Martyna sit up in bed and propped some pillows behind her so she could eat. Her bruised ribs were healing nicely according to the doctor, but they still hurt. She suffered lacerations on her head, as well as a mild concussion, fractured foot and a broken arm – all of which were healing better then expected. She would smile and nod when the doctor spoke to her, but all she asked about was Nevada.

 

 

“When can I see him? Where is he?” Martyna questioned Sean, and everytime he said the same thing, “he’s doing better” and “later”. He hadn’t told her how Nevada really was, he didn’t think his Mom would handle it well. He tried to put off that conversation as long as possible, but Martyna was getting antsy, and she knew something was wrong. ‘Let him be alright’ she said to no one in particular, hoping. She kept those dark thoughts at bay for now, the ‘what if’s’ and the worst case scenarios, but she wouldn’t be able to do that for much longer – she had to know. Martyna decided that if she was going to get the run around, she’ll look for Nevada tonight, herself, when Sean and the day staff were off.

 

 

“Mom these came for you” Sean put another vase on the already crowed window sill. “Look, flowers!” He said sarcastically “More from work…” He handed Martyna a take away bag from Cellies Delicatessen with one of her favorite sandwiches inside; Lox with cream cheese on marble rye. “Oh my God Sean, is this from Cellies?” He nodded smiling “Maria told me it was your favorites – smells like shit though.” She threw the bag at him “Nevada and I used to go there all the time…” She trailed off, suddenly realizing where she was. ‘The urgent Care Center…holy shit what are the chances...’ The last time she was in a hospital in New York, it was in this one, when Nevada had been hoisted up with meat hooks in the old warehouse and left for dead so many years ago. She was in the room down the hall from his, recovering herself after she beat the fuck out of that psycho pervert who attempted to assault her. ‘It’s a sign’ Martyna was sure of it. ‘Only a few more hours until the shift change, and Sean will be leaving soon as well.’ She waited patiently for the evening to arrive, hoping she could find Nevada.

 

* * *

 

 

Pulling the wheelchair close to the side of the bed, Martyna slid off and into the seat. She lifted her braced foot up and over, carefully placing it on the foot holds of the wheelchair. Using her good arm, she pushed off the bed and spun the wheel around trying to head for the door. She nudged closer with the foot that wasn’t fractured, then again moved the wheel with the opposite hand. It was taking forever.

 

 

Finally reaching the hall she used the wall railing to pull herself along the side. She concluded he must be in the ICU from the way her questions were continuously being dodged. ‘Do I really want to know?’ She asked herself, she wasn’t sure she did. But Martyna knew that if she didn’t find out now, she wouldn’t have another chance at it, and it would drive her crazy thinking about him.

 

 

She followed the arrows and prompts on the wall diagrams: Cardiac, Emergency, X-Ray and Ultrasound…’Where the hell is the ICU?’ She didn’t want to ask because she didn’t want to answer questions as to why she wasn’t in her room or what she was doing…the fact no one had already asked was just weird to her…

 

 

“There, finally…” The sign read Intensive Care with an arrow pointing straight. She wheeled herself to the doors and hit the button. Nothing happened. Martyna hit it again, and again – nothing.

 

 

“Excuse me, are you supposed to be here?” A voice came from behind her. The nurse had her arms crossed so she already knew the answer to the question she asked. Shit.

 

 

“Please” Martyna pleaded, “I’m looking for my…a friend. He was, _we_ were in an accident and I want to make sure he’s not…. I just want to see him, and no one will tell me how he is and I just can’t…” She burst into tears and felt like a complete flake, she just couldn’t regain her composure. Looking her over, the nurse sighed, and took pity on her.

 

 

“What's the name?”

 

 

“Nevada.” She sniffled, wiping her nose “Ramirez.”

 

 

The nurse flipped the chart over and looked for the name, tapping her pen on her chin as she did so. When she found it, the tapping stopped. The nurse read the chart silently and then put it back in the slot by the doors. She looked at Martyna, seriously. “If you will wait here I’ll get the doctor” Before Martyna had a chance to question her the nurse disappeared down the hall.

 

 

“Ms. Kaczynski? I’m doctor Davids” He extended his hand and she shook it gently.” I was the on-call physician in emergency when you and Mr. Ramirez were brought in. Is he your husband?” Martyna wiped her eyes “No, he’s not” She felt a pinch of sadness at her answer. “What’s wrong with him? No one will tell me anything” The doctor motioned toward a sitting area across the hall “Lets talk in there”

 

 

“Ms. Kaczynski, Mr. Ramirez injuries are extensive. At present, he is on life support. He under went emergency surgery to remove a piece of metal that penetrated his abdomen and ruptured his spleen.” Martyna struggled to grasp what was being said to her. “Did it cut open his entire midsection?” She was horrified, and the tears ran freely down her face “I just…I don’t understand ‘extensive’, was there something else? Did the metal piece hit a major organ? Is that why he’s on life support…” She sobbed openly. “Ms. Kaczynski, if you’ll allow me to explain…” The doctor gave her a stern but caring look and she nodded. “The surgery went as well as can be expected. No other organs were damaged by the object. Because of the position of the metal piece and the way it impacted the sternum, it was a very lengthy surgery – eight hours. To keep Mr. Ramirez sedated through out the procedure, several IV’s were administered at once in his right arm. Because the arm was stationary for that length of time, blood pooled there. When the anesthetic wore off, and he was able to move the arm, the clots that had formed in his arm travelled to his lungs, and they burst. Because of this, his lungs filled with fluid and he is not able to breath on his own. We could not have foreseen this complication, and we are doing everything we can to help him. Until his condition has stabilized and the fluid stops accumulating in the lungs, he must remain heavily sedated for his own safety. With breathing tubes there is always the risk of internal injury. We must be cautious here.”

 

 

Martyna stared at the doctor. She always thought at a moment like this she would have a billion questions. But she only had one. “Can I see him?”

 

 

“We only allow family in the ICU”

 

 

“He is the father of my son. I am his family.”

 

 

The doctor let out a heavy sigh. With concern on his face, he opened the heavy metal doors with a swipe of his key card.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted chapters 25/26 consecutively, so please see chapter 25 first, thanks :)

 

 

****

Martyna wheeled herself down the corridor of the ICU. It was difficult for her to see the patients faces from the chair. She pulled up next to a column and stood up holding onto it. She looked around but didn’t see Nevada’s bed anywhere. There were so many people there, and the smell made her feel nauseas. It was a grotesque mix of disinfectant and vomit and skin. It made the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. The smell of clinging onto life – it was heart breaking and vile all at the same time.

 

****

“…Help you?” A nurses irritated voice came from behind her

 

 

“I’m looking for Nevada Ramirez. Doctor Davids said I can see him.”

 

 

“Wait here” The nurse left for the station to contact the doctor. “Beotch” Martyna muttered under her breath.

 

 

“What was the name? Ramada?”

 

 

“Ramirez.”

 

 

“This way”

 

 

The nurse didn’t seem to care that Martyna was in a wheelchair with only the use of one arm and one leg as she almost sprinted in front of her until she disappeared around a corner. ‘Great’ Martyna rolled her eyes. She made it around the corner where the nurse waited impatiently by a tattered blue and white stripped curtain. “Visitors are not permitted to stay past 9:00 pm” she said, then scampered off yelling at some other visitor breaking the rules of the ‘high and mighty’ nurse from hell. ‘Fuck…’ Martyna shook her head.

 

 

Taking a deep breath, Martyna pulled open the curtain. She gasped as her hand went to her mouth to cover the small noises. “Oh God…” He eyes welled up and she sat in her chair, watching all the machinery hiss and pump around him. He looked animated, unrecognisable as a man. He looked like he was a character from the film _Aliens._

 

 

Nevada’s hands and arms were bruised and swollen, and IV’s littered the underside of his forearm. Tubes stuck out from underneath the hospital gown leading up to a machine and a catheter tube ran down the other side of the bed into a bag. More tubes coming out of every part of his body that she just couldn’t account for running up and down to different machines, and she had no idea what their purpose was. The sheer number of tubes was terrifying…But all those didn’t come close to the monstrosity of plastic coming out of his face.   Nevada’s head was held still facing front with a large brace that wrapped around the sides and top of his head. White tape stretched under his nose and above his lip holding the top of the mouth piece in place that turned his lips a bluey/red color. The enormous tube that rested in his throat allowing him to breath was connected to two large translucent blue tubes that resembled small accordions. Those were strung along his shoulder and over to yet another machine. He had a black eye, half his face and limbs were swollen, his legs were riddled with bruises, the bandage from the surgery was stained with blood, there was a cast on his left leg that reached his knee and he couldn’t breath for himself. All Martyna could do was shake her head and cry. She couldn’t make this better, she couldn’t fix it – she couldn’t fix him. She felt absolutely hopeless and helpless all at the same time.

 

 

She wheeled herself close to the bed and put her hand on his and held it while she cried. She ran her face along his wrist and prayed he would suddenly grab her hand and wake up. Martyna sobbed quietly beside him as she remembered all the shit they went through together when they were younger. All the good times and the bad ones. She never regretted leaving with her unborn child, but as she sat at Nevada’s bedside, wondering if he’ll recover or sercome to his injuries, Martyna realised for the first time in twenty plus years, that this broken man, and her, were always destined to be together. She only now realised that it wouldn’t have mattered if she never returned to Washington Heights, never saw him again, and even died without ever saying a word to him - they were _one._ And that was all. It was so simple, but yet it eluded her her entire life. All this time denying and pushing it away never changed the fact that it simply just _was._

 

 

Martyna wiped her eyes and held his hand. If he was hers for this life, she was not about to give up, or let him do that either. Not really knowing what to do, she began talking to him about their younger times together and how much fun they had at the street festivals, and the soccer the men and them would play together, she recalled fondly. The time when Peter dressed up in the grim reaper costume at Halloween and hid in the bathroom waiting for Maddy to open the door. When Peter jumped out he was so scared he screamed like a little girl and tripped and fell over himself, sending all the laundry flying down the stairs.

 

 

And the time Marco had that party, and all of them went dressed in purple except for Alex, who showed up in a suit and tie, out of nowhere. They used the kitchen sink to mix the vodka and kool aid, and people just started filling their glasses up from the dirty sink…it was gross, and she laughed aloud. Martyna guessed that if everyone hadn’t dropped acid a couple hours before, a bowl would have been seen as the perfect way to serve that shit in.

 

 

And she wasn’t even going touch the whole batwing thing with the testicles…that was something to save for another time, she thought, chocking on her tears and giggling at the same moment.

 

 

When she felt she had nothing else to say, Martyna grabbed on to the bed and hoisted herself up to sit on the edge. She ran her hand gently over Nevada’s face and smoothed over his messy hair. She ran her fingers from front to back along his hairline while she quietly sang an old Polish song her Mother used to sing to her as a child. As she sang to him, she tenderly kissed his injured face, and ran her hand and fingers through his hair. Martyna felt her eyes begin to fill with tears, and she threw her arm over Nevada’s lifeless body and cried. “Please…please…” She begged him “Come back to me. I love you…. I’ve always loved you”

 

 

Martyna sobbed holding on to him, forgetting that anything she said could be heard through the curtain. On the other side, the new shift of nurses listened to Martyna cry and sing to Nevada, and her sentiment for him touched them, and they sighed and smiled. Some even became a little teary.

 

 

Being caught up in the moment, no one noticed the spikes on the machines Nevada was hooked up to on the station monitor.

 

 

And Martyna was too lost in sadness to notice the slightest twitching of Nevada’s hand.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	27. Chapter 27

 

 

****

Nevada sat up in the hospital bed running his hands through his hair. He had been in the hospital a total of almost five weeks, at least three he had no recollection of. His body took a beating, and he knew given his age that he was lucky he recovered with so few complications. His throat still hurt from the breathing tube and he could still feel his incision throb, but he was going home, fucking finally – home. His men were bringing her to pick him up. Martyna. His woman. _His_. Nothing changed the fact that she belonged to him, she belonged _with_ him. Forever. Now, more then anytime before in his life, his resolve to have this woman with him until the day he dies had never been stronger. The feeling was absolute. There was no other way.

 

 

In the blurry fog of the drug induced state he was in and out of, Nevada remembered Martyna being with him, sitting with him, and crying over him. He thought he recalled her singing to him, but he couldn’t be sure. He couldn’t wait to leave and eat some decent food and drink some well aged scotch. He thought of telling his men to stop on the way back to his apartment, at one of the many restaurants that would clear an entire section just for him, so they could dine in private. But that didn’t fit what he wanted. Nevada considered the perfect place, then it hit him. ‘Yes. That’s it’ He called his more seasoned men with his orders, the ones he knew wouldn’t fuck it up, and told them to hurry up with it - he would be leaving soon.

 

 

He wanted to be with her, stare at her beauty, tell her his intentions. Of course, she would fight, shake her head, and curse at him. He knew she wouldn’t give up her independence – her job, her income, her home…this was going to take some careful wording on his part. He had to find some middle ground. He never had to do that before, people just did whatever the fuck he told them to do. Martyna was a mouthy, defiant, stubborn woman and she drove him fucking crazy. But Nevada knew all too well that it was those very same characteristics that saved her. And his son. He was reminded of that fact every god-damn-time the police came in his room, pestering him about the details of the accident.

 

 

“Mr. Ramirez did you know the assailants? Are you involved? What is your connection to these men?” and it went on. There was no connection, not to him directly. He knew the car, it was all over town running drugs – but it wasn’t his merchandise. He knew the men, their boss, what borough they were out of, everything. The cops thought it was his shit because of the accident, but this wasn’t the case. One of the younger bosses, who had just inherited the business from the untimely death of his father, decided in his infinite wisdom that he wasn’t going to pay to move his shit around anyone’s turf anymore. That decision was the beginning of the end for that idiot, and the vehicles that were shooting at each other ended up sandwiching his car with both of them in it. The bullets were never meant for Nevada, him and Martyna were caught in the cross fire. He was free and clear - and it pissed the cops off to no end. ‘Those pendejos are too stupid to figure out my business’ He snickered and folded his shirt, placing it in his suitcase as he waited for Martyna arrive.

 

* * *

 

 

“Nevada where are we going? You’re supposed to be going home to rest, that’s why I flew back” Martyna was clearly irritated. She had a plan: Pick Nevada up, get him settled at home, call Sean to let him know she was back and to tell Maria, cook supper, then catch up on work while Nevada did whatever Nevada did…and he was fucking it all up. “I have work to do, this is not what I had planned. Where are we going?” Nevada could hear the tension in her voice, but he had already assumed she had a plan that he was going to fuck up, and he didn’t care. He had a plan of his own.

 

 

“We’ll be there shortly…Please mi amor, trust me.” He ran his hand down her cheek and she could feel the goose bumps run over her body. Martyna turned away and crossed her arms, frustrated he was changing what she wanted to do. He pulled her over to him gently and put his hand on her bare leg. His touch was like a million volts of electricity and she bit her lips to repress a moan. She hated he was able to make her feel like that when she was ticked with him. Martyna brushed him off again, but Nevada knew he was getting to her, and he nuzzled his nose in the neap of her neck, speaking small Spanish phrases as he kissed her softly. He felt a heavy breath escape her lips and he ran his hand further up her thighs. Her legs were smooth as silk and the bulge in his pants grew larger by the second. Nevada turned Martyna’s head toward him and she grabbed his cheeks, flicking his lips with her tongue until he opened his mouth. He yanked the back of her hair and thrust his tongue in her mouth and she moaned loudly, her middle already wet and swollen for him. They kissed each other and everything around them faded. There was nothing else, just them.

 

 

The driver pulled into the parking lot of a shady looking motel and got out. He walked around and opened the door for Nevada and Martyna, clearing his throat to announce he was standing there waiting. By the time the kiss was broken they were both panting. Their chests heaved, and they couldn’t stop from touching each other. He had to have her, to own her – body and soul. He could live with nothing less. Nevada wanted every inch of all she was to be his, and only his.

 

 

He stepped out of the vehicle and offered Martyna his hand. She took it and smiled, blushing that the driver had saw them, and probably heard her. Shit. She stopped and looked around, furrowing her eyebrows and cocking her head. This looked familiar, but she couldn’t place it. Nevada stood there smiling at her confusion with his arms crossed. He was enjoying this, and Martyna did a double take when she saw him almost laughing. “What’s this?” She spread her arms out and gestured to the building with a confused look on her face. “You don’t remember?” He asked her, still smiling. “Come with me.” He gave her his elbow and she hooked her arm through his. “What are you up too…” Nevada just laughed and lead her to the door.

 

 

Room number 4

 

 

Martyna contemplated the significance. ‘Four, four…’ She looked around for an identifying landmark, something that would jar her memory… “Oh my God” She almost screeched, putting her hand over her mouth and giggling. “Nevada! Is this _the_ motel? Is this the same room?!” He moved beside her and put his arm around her waist. “Yep – same one.” Martyna couldn’t believe he remembered. It was this motel, and this exact room where they spent their first night together after Nevada and her father had their little meeting in the back of the restaurant. ‘What was it? Twenty three, twenty four years ago…?’ She couldn’t remember. It felt like a life time ago. “Shall we?” Nevada lead her into the room and her jaw dropped when she saw the inside. Instead of the stank linens and tacky décor, the room was perfectly redone with new window dressings in luxurious fabrics and the bedding was puffy white down filled heaven. All the furniture was replaced, and a huge area rug covered almost all the stained carpet. On every table there were flowers - Iris’ in every color, her favorite. There was a small table off to the side with a warm white cloth draped over it, and candles flickering around a large vase of twelve white roses. The place setting for two was different shades of blue and purple, her favorite colors. It was beautiful.

 

 

“Nevada…I…I don’t know what to say, it’s beautiful…How did you do this…” He moved toward her from behind and brushed her hair off the back of her neck, laying a long, soft kiss on it. Martyna’s knees almost gave way and he wrapped his arm around her waist to hold her up. Hers stretched around the side of her head to touch his face, while the other held his arm. His hands squeezed her, and she moaned at the sensation. Nevada licked and kissed her neck, running his hand up her blouse and over her lace bra. He groaned when he felt it and couldn’t wait to rip it off her body. Martyna turned around and he thrust his tongue in her mouth and she ripped off the vest that covered his white shirt and threw it on the ground. He pushed her against the wall and lifted her leg on his waist, tearing her skirt. His hand slid up her thigh and felt thin straps attached to her stockings. His cock throbbed as he looked down. She was wearing a garter belt. “ _Fuck_ ” He ripped the remaining fabric of her skirt to her waist and his hands frantically slid all over her, feeling the slickness on her legs. She moaned and cried out when his fingers pushed inside her, fucking her hard and spilling all her wetness down his hand. He yanked the back of her hair and bit her neck. Her knees gave out and her body went limp. He was the only man who could do this to her, make her weak, and she fucking loved it. Nevada spun her around and pushed her on the bed. He roughly spread her legs and buried his face in her pussy. He licked and sucked like he was famished and Martyna screamed for more above him. Sweat began to cover her body in tiny droplets. He lifted his head up from between her legs and saw her body shake. Her hands were on her face, her back was arched and the sound of her moaning for him was heaven. “ _I love the way you taste – so fucking good_ ” He pushed three fingers back inside her and she screamed, coming hard and soaking his hand and the sheets, yelling his name. He crawled on top of her and tore off her blouse. Nevada stared at her breasts and let out a deep groan. Black lace. He ripped it off her body and attacked her breasts with his mouth. Martyna couldn’t take any more, the pleasure was too much. He wrapped his hand around her throat as his mouth sucked and bit her body. The scent of her skin was intoxicating. She grabbed at his shirt, splitting it apart. She ran her fingers down his muscular body, careful to avoid the bandage. Fuck he was hot. She wanted him inside her now, stretching her, filling her up. She looked up at him. “ _Please don’t_ _stop_ ” Her voice was breathy, and it made his cock ache to be inside her. “ _Say it_ ” Nevada held her wrists above her, and the head of his cock teased her entrance. “ _Say it_ ” He growled and squeezed her wrists. “ _What_ ” She struggled beneath him “ _What do you want me to say_?” Nevada tightened his grip and she saw that look in his eyes, like an animal. She spread her legs wider for him, feeling her juices run down her thighs. “ _You fucking know what_ _I want_.” His face was pressed against hers and she moaned into his mouth. “ _Say it. Tell me_ ” It took everything he had to maintain his control. Her eyes had changed color from blue to turquois and his knees felt weak staring at them. She gazed at him, struggling to keep her eyes open. Her tongue licked at his parted lips.

 

 

“ _I’m yours_ ”

 

 

“ _More_ ”

 

 

“ _Please…”_

 

 

“ _You know what I want”_

 

 

Nevada hovered over her as her body squirmed beneath him. He had to hear her say it. He needed to hear her say it. Martyna opened her eyes wide, staring into his. Her muscles relaxed, and she stopped fighting him. Her lips found his and she placed the tiniest of kisses on them. When she spoke it was an intoxicating, breathy drawl that made him moan.

 

 

“ _I love you.”_

 

 

Nevada let out the breath he was holding and crashed his mouth on hers. He licked and sucked and moaned into her mouth. He waited a life time to hear her say those words, he waited a life time for her. There was no way in hell he would ever let her go again. He thrust his cock inside her so hard she screamed his name, sobbing at the pleasure he gave her. He lifted her leg over his shoulder and pounded into her. Sweat dripped from his brow and he watched Martyna’s back arch, begging him never to stop. He pulled out, flipping her over on all fours. He rammed his hard cock into her soaking wet pussy and he felt her tighten around him. “ _Fuck you feel so good…Jesus Christ_ ” Nevada thrust himself inside her, the feeling was like heaven, she was like heaven. He came, hard and long and he whispered her name over and over. He slumped over on Martyna’s back, trying to catch his breath. Both exhausted, they curled up together on the soft white duvet. He kissed her shoulders, wrapping his arm around her waist. She turned her head and kissed the top of his nose, smiling.

 

 

“Say it again”

 

 

“I love you”

 

 

He smiled and nuzzled into her neck before drifting off to sleep.

 

 

She turned to watch him sleep, and contemplated the situation. Martyna wanted this man in her life, in her son’s life. But there was no way she would give up what she worked so hard for. She had some maneuvering to do with this, she had to figure out what angle she was going to come from so this wouldn’t be a total disaster. ‘Everything in life is a compromise’ Martyna reflected. ‘And sometimes, you have to eat shit.’ It was unavoidable. Having her fair share of shit in her lifetime, Martyna preferred to eat hers with pickles and ice cream. ‘Because if you must choke that ‘thing’ down, whatever that ‘thing’ is, the shit, what better way to do so then with ice cream and pickles’. She thought the analogy was perfect, given the current direction this was going in, and giggled to her self quietly. She turned and kissed Nevada on his lips as he slept.

 

 

She put her hand on her abdomen and rubbed it gently. She wasn’t sure when the cramps stared, but they had been bugging her for a while now. She hoped it wasn’t something that was missed from the accident. She decided she’d make an appointment to see the doctor the next day, just to be on the safe side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	28. Chapter 28

 

 

When they finally made it to Nevada’s apartment, the argument that began in the SUV had escalated into a full-blown yelling match. Nevada wanted Martyna and Sean to stay in New York with him – live with him. He had planned it out entirely for her. If she felt she needed to work, Nevada assured her there were many bars, restaurants and shops where she could get a little job if she wanted. Martyna was fuming mad. How dare he talk down to her, after she worked her so hard to be as successful as she was now. He showed zero respect for her life, her education, and her career. What an asshole.

 

 

“Why the fuck do you have to fly back and forth for work?! You don’t have to work Martyna – I got you!” Nevada’s face was red with anger, he didn’t get the attraction to what she did. “Back and forth and back and forth…” he waved his hand; the gesture was as sarcastic as they get. “Makes no sense! What could you possibly be doing in Toronto that you can’t do here? What the fuck is there to do there anyway?” Martyna crossed her arms and let out a half laugh at what she was hearing.

 

 

“Are you fucking kidding me?! Have you ever been there?”

 

 

“No. Why would I go there?”

 

 

“So how do you know?”

 

 

“I just do” He adjusted his stance and smirked at her. She wanted to smack it right off his face.

 

 

“Oh you ‘just do’, do ya? And how do you know that?” Martyna glared at him, knowing full well he was full of shit. “Did your crystal ball tell you that? Shall we all go under the assumption that because Nevada thinks it, it must be right? No facts, no proof, no nothing – just, ‘I thought it, so it’s right’! How fuckin’ ignorant are you?” She pointed her finger at him and he balled his hands into fists, stepping closer to her.

 

 

“Martyna” His teeth grinding as her said her name. “Shut the fuck up”. His knuckles were as white as clouds and the anger rose up from his guts. “Do not _ever_ talk to me like that again or else…” She cut him short, yelling.

 

 

“Or else what Nevada? Your going to beat me? What punishment would it be this time huh?!” She was ferrous with him. The pitch in her voice rose to a yell and she just couldn’t stop herself for spitting out the sarcasm. “Come on Papi, show your son what you’re made of - _hit me! -_ show him how to fucking treat people….” She was lost in her anger. “You wanna hurt me - sure as shit wouldn’t be the first time you had _zero_ self control” Martyna spat her words at him like he was dirt – a monster. He wasn’t, and he was irate that she kept making him feel like that. After all he just did? The surprise at the motel, the money spent – which was substantial, everything… Nevada had fucking had it. He had self control, tons of it. He hadn’t put her threw the God damn window – that’s control.

 

 

Martyna took some deep breaths, biting down on her tongue hard. Slowly, she began addressing the issues. She looked over at Nevada, he was so mad he was shaking. The veins were pulsating on the side of his face, his eyes were narrowed, and his jaw clenched and unclenched. He stood there shooting daggers at her with his stare. He never touched her. She figured it wouldn’t last.

 

 

Taking a deep breath, she spoke firmly, but gently. “I don’t need you to take care of me financially Nevada, or any other way; _I_ got me. I didn’t even accept the money my Father tried to shove down my throat when I first moved all those years ago. I had to know I could do it on my own. And I did. I went to night school, got my degree, got a good job…it wasn’t easy – especially with trying to raise a child at the same time, but I did it. I did it for both of us.” Martyna looked up at him, shaking her head. “How can you not see just how much it took to do that? How can you not see the extent of the success I have accumulated through all my hard work? ’A little job?’ Can you be anymore insulting to me?” Her words trailed off and she stared at the ground for a long minute. “I have no desire to be trapped and dependant on someone else that way. I worked my ass off for what I have, and I’m proud of that.” Martynas shoulders slumped, all the anger now erased from her. She looked up at him and let out a heavy sigh. Her fingers went to her temples, feeling the pressure in her sinus alleviated temporarily when she rubbed them. She went to speak and gulped back her words. He didn’t get it, he just saw red. He was standing there with his arms crossed, no emotion on his face at all, like a robot, like a corpse. It was like he was dead, like someone hit a switch on a robot and reset it. It was… creepy didn’t quite cut it. She wondered where all the rage went, the white knuckles, the pulsating veins…she had never seen him like this…suddenly there was just nothing.

 

 

“Are you fucking done?” He waited a moment for her to answer before he spat his words at her, then spat at her feet.

 

 

“Nevada what the hell are you doing!”

 

 

“Get out. Don’t come back” His voice was like ice over steel.

 

 

“What! What are you talking….” Martyna didn’t get a chance to finish before he exploded.

 

 

“ _GET OUT_! Get the fuck out bitch! _NOW_!” He grabbed her arm and she cried out. She lost her footing and tripped, Nevada dragged her on the floor to the door.

 

 

“Get up!” He hissed at her. “Get the fuck up! _NOW!_ ” Martyna slid her back up the apartment door until she was standing flush with it, tears streaming down her face.

 

 

That look had returned to his face, just like that. Emotionless. “Get out.” He said plainly, like he just ordered a coffee. “Never come back here.”

 

 

He flung open the door and pushed her out into the hall, slamming it behind her. Martyna stood in the hall crying openly. She stood there for awhile, not sure what to do. Some of the men poked their heads out from their doors at the commotion, shrugging her off and going back inside. One man came out and began walking toward her. “I’m going, I’m going…” She put her hands up by her head and tried to walk passed him. She kept her head down, sobbing. “Are you ok miss?” The sediment surprised her, and Martyna looked up. “Yes, I’m ok, thank you. I was just leaving, if you’ll excuse me…” Martyna walked by him and quickly jumped into the open elevator door. Once inside, she broke down, sitting on the floor with her head in her hands. “How could I have been so stupid” she said to herself quietly between the gasps for air and the sobs. “How could I have thought…” Her words vanished into sorrow and she sat on the dirty floor crying, all the way from the penthouse to the lobby.

 

 

Nevada stormed into his kitchen and poured a full glass of the most expensive scotch he had and downed it in three gulps. Then he poured himself another and paced angrily around his apartment, muttering to himself.

 

 

“Who the fuck does she think she is? Fucking bitch thinks she can talk to me like that…” Downing his second glass of scotch “After what I did for her…fucking ungrateful, little…how could she say that shit to me? Comes back in my life and fucks it up, I was fucking good before she showed up” Nevada angerly kicked the vase housing the Pampas grass, sending it flying into the wall and smashing into tiny piece. “How could she say that shit!” Nevada was beginning to boil, and he felt his hands shake around the glass. “She doesn’t want my money…’I got me’ he sang in a condescending voice. “Fucking Toronto? _Toronto!_ -chooses that shit over me… _ME_! _”_ He threw his glass at the wall and it shattered into a million pieces on the hard wood. He punched the wall and his hand tore through it, ripping parts of his flesh. “Doesn’t want to be dependant…” Nevada gulped the scotch straight from the bottle “…on me! Did it on her _own!_ I never got to see him grow, his whole childhood fucking gone… _FUCKING PUTA!”_ He was in a rage, brought on by repressed emotions and hard liquor. Slurring and spitting and throwing whatever was in arms reach. He finished off the bottle and chucked it against the wall, denting the drywall and smashing a picture. “I don’t need you to take care of me she says…I got me she says…You fucking need me bitch! _You need me!”_ His fist swung again at the wall and missed, he lost his footing on the area rug and fell face first on it. He noticed there was blood, but he couldn’t focus enough to figure out where it was coming from. Nevada rolled over and stared at the ceiling. Tears pooled in his eyes and he rubbed them away. He whispered in the lowest voice, closing his eyes before passing out cold “Why don’t you need me Martyna”.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Nevada! Nevada you in there!? Answer the door you son of a bitch!” Nevada opened his eyes and rubbed the crust out of them. The pain slid over his head and it began to throb uncontrollably. He slowly sat up, memories of the night before began to fill his head. When his eyes came into focus, he noticed his apartment looked like a bomb went off. Broken glass and picture frames littered the floor, dents in the drywall and his scotch bottle sitting in the bottom of his now unrepairable glass coffee table. There was something going on in the hall, he heard his men shouting …what were they saying… “What the fuck is going on out there!” He yelled toward the door and it made his head pound. He dragged his body off the floor and he felt like it weighted two tons. When he finally made it to the foyer, there was a loud thud that vibrated off the door, and he swore he saw the metal move. Nevada grabbed the gun he kept in the table by the front and flung the door open. It was Sean. He was pinned down by five of his men while three others lie on the hall floor, bleeding and moaning.

 

 

“Enough – let him up” Nevada gestured with a flick of his hand to let him go, and Sean jumped up from the mans grasp, punching the one directly behind him in the face multiple times, sending him flying backwards and hitting the wall. His men grabbed him again, wrestling him to the ground with his arms behind his back.

 

 

“Bring him” Nevada walked back into the apartment and his men followed, dropping Sean on the floor and kicking him in the ribs just for good measure. “I said enough!” Nevada shouted. He rolled over squinting in pain before he got up and tried to rush the men leaving. Nevada pulled him back by the collar of his plaid shirt, chocking him slightly. Sean shrugged him off, turning to him with hate in his eyes.

 

 

“Get the fuck off me man”

 

 

“Watch your mouth boy”

 

 

“Fuck you – where’s my Mom? She told me she was coming here last night”

 

 

Nevada stared at him dumbly for a second. “How the fuck should I know” He spat at him “She left” He didn’t bother brining up the fact that he pushed her out. Sean put his hands on his hips and his lip curled under his teeth. Nevada couldn’t help but notice the likeness to himself when he was pissed. “She was supposed to meet me at Cellies this morning for breakfast. She never showed. Where is she?” Nevada stopped what he was doing and stared at Sean. He knew Martyna would never miss anything with her son, not without a text, or a call. She would never just not show up. Something was wrong. His guts tightened. This shit was on him, and he knew it. He had no idea where she went or what happed to her. A sick feeling washed over him, and he felt nauseous. ‘Fuck me, where is she?’. Panic bubbled underneath Nevada’s calm exterior. In his drunken rage, he never thought about her protection, he never thought about his enemies using her to get to him. He only thought of himself, his bruised ego, his bullshit. And now look what happened. There was no excuse for it. How could he have been so stupid, so careless. This was his fault. He directly, and consciously, put her in danger and didn’t even think twice about it. ‘Jesus Christ what have I done’ Nevada sat down and ran his hands through his hair. Sean sat next to him. “Nevada, where’s my Mom?” He looked over at him with wide eyes, and right then Sean knew.

 

 

He knew she had been taken.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	29. Chapter 29

 

 

 

Martyna awoke in a small, concrete room that housed a make shift toilet and a dirty cot. There were no windows, and the light that hung by a few electrical wires flickered constantly. She sat up and rubbed her head. It throbbed with pain, and she felt a large bump at the back. She was cold, and the blanket that was left for her stunk so badly she couldn’t even try to wrap it around herself without gagging. Martyna took in the space. Whoever took her knew what they were doing – these weren’t amateurs. She remembered back when she was young and accidentally stumbling upon the room her father used for his “meetings” he would call them, a holding cell for individuals until they either talked, or died. This room was eerily similar. “Great.”

 

 

She could not believe at her age she was actually back in the shit again. After all those years of a normal life, a good life, a great life…here she was. Sitting on filth with tore clothes, bruises in the form of hand prints on her arms and absolutely no clue where she was, and who took her. She knew it was because of _him._ All because she came back. None of this shit would have happened if she had stayed at home – none of this would have happened if _he_ was not in her life. Tears poured down her face and Martyna wondered where Sean was, was he ok, was he hurt, was he here too? Dark thoughts clouded her mind and she jumped up and banged and kicked on the door, she had to get out of here and find him. She could only pray Nevada took care of him – hid him, put his men on him - fuck flew him home…. anything. Anything to keep him safe.

 

 

“ _LET ME OUT YOU BASTARDS!”_ Martyna yelled and punched and kicked the heavy steel door. Crying and chocking on her tears she backed away and ran her hands through her hair. The silence was killing her. There came a screechy, metal on metal noise from the bottom of the door and it sounded like fingernails down a chalk board, making her cringe. A tray was slid under the door then slammed shut, making her head pound more. Martyna walked over and saw that there was food on the tray; a sandwich with a bottle of water and a bottle of Advil. There was a smell she recognised, faint, but there. Bending down she picked up the sandwich, then threw it back on the tray and stepped back. It was Lox with cream cheese on marble rye. Her favorite. Panic started deep in her core and she could taste the bile oozing up from her stomach to her throat. “What the hell...” she whispered. Martyna sat on the cot and stared at the tray. They had been following her, watching her, watching everyone around her. “Fuck” she whispered. Her fingers went to her face and she rubbed it hard. “Think, think... Who was around, did I see anyone around all the time…a face, clothes…” She racked her brain over and over. Nothing. Martyna took a deep breath, trying to calm herself so she could think without the emotion. Whoever had taken her, had followed Sean into Cellies when he picked up the sandwich for her when she was in the hospital. That meant they knew she was there and why, and they also knew Sean was her son, so chances of them stalking him were pretty high. That thought made Martyna shake and she sucked back the tears and tried to focus. They also knew that Nevada was there, and most likely knew when he was being discharged, and that she was probably going to be there to pick him up. She figured her and Nevada were followed to the motel, watched them - Martyna felt sick thinking some pervert, or perverts, were watching them have sex - then followed them to Nevada’s apartment. How else would they know where she was there?

 

 

Martyna couldn’t quite place when she blacked out or was knocked out. She remembered leaving the elevator, walking through the lobby, but that was it. How did no one see her being taken? It didn’t make sense.

 

 

“You should eat.” The voice came from the other side of the door. “One can never be sure when the opportunity will come around again”.

 

 

Martyna jumped at the sound. A small metal slit opened at the top of the door, and dark eyes peered in for a second, then vanished. She sat up straight. “That voice…I swear I’ve heard it before…” She tried to think where, but her head pounded with pain. She looked at the Advil and contemplated taking it. ‘It could be laced with something – I would never know’ She decided against it and laid down instead. ‘Where have I heard that voice?’ Martyna knew if she could figure that out, she would know who took her – and that was a start. At the very least it gave her some control over her situation, and that, at the moment, was everything.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Nevada had with his men split up, going to each of the other boss’s territory. No doubt they had all heard by now and would be expecting them. Some of the men would go straight in, hands up, and ask to speak with their boss while the others snuck in with their weapons. Those are the ones Nevada told to report back with anything they found – from a bracelet to a piece of clothing. Going in with hands up was a sign of respect on someone’s turf, but in doing so Nevada’s crew lost the element of surprise. Knowing his men were around the corner gave the bosses plenty of time to take Martyna else where. Abducting another boss’s significant other was like begging to be executed. This shit hadn’t happened in fifteen plus years, and with good reason. It got to the point years ago where the vendettas were so large, involving so many families that no one was doing any business, no money was coming in to anyone. The killings were rampant and every other day a funeral was held, it became a bloodbath and no one family was better off then the other – no one was on top. Revenues plummeted across the board and customers went else where for their needs. It was a disaster. That’s when the heads of the families called a meeting to settle the disputes once and for all. It took time but it got done, and slowly things settled down and everyone got back to business. There was a peace among the families that had lasted until now. Nevada couldn’t for the life of him wrap his head around why someone would go and fuck it up.

 

 

He was mad, fuming mad. What had they done with her? Where was she? Why? It made no sense. He had done nothing to provoke this shit. His entire focus had been on Martyna since she came back. He suddenly realized how faulty that mindset was. He wasn’t paying attention – wasn’t focused. Had he been, he would have noticed something was off – noticed looks, body language and vibes from people. He hadn’t lasted this long in the business from having dull wits. But the emotions he felt for her did dull him, they dumbed him down. When she was around him, that’s all he saw. When she wasn’t with him, she was all he thought about. “God damnit how could I have been so fuckin’ stupid” he muttered to himself. If she was in Toronto this wouldn’t have happened. And his son, what about him? Nevada knew it wouldn’t be long before word got out about him… he had to keep him safe.

 

 

“Boss we got somethin’” Nevada was snapped out of his daze and marched over to his men “What, which family is it” The statement made the two men shift nervously and look at each other. This drove Nevada’s temper through the roof. “What the fuck is that, you got somethin’ to say to me _SAY IT_!” The two men looked at each other again, fidgeting with their keys. Nevada grabbed one of the men by his throat and pushed him against the wall, the sound of his neck cracking echoed through the apartment. “Did you not hear me carbon? Eres sordo? I said if you have something to fucking say to me, _THEN SAY IT!”_ The man was chocking and finally the other one blurted out “It was one of our own” Nevada dropped the man and he laid on the floor coughing, holding his neck. He turned around and just stood there. The man looked straight at Nevada when he spoke. “It was one of our own. The young guy, in apartment 310.” Nevada stepped closer to him so his face was millimetres from the other man’s.

 

 

“How do you know this?”

 

 

“All his shit is gone; the apartment is bare except for what was there before he moved in. This was on the kitchen table.” He handed Nevada a thin gold chain with a small moon pendent. It was attached to the chain in the middle, so the moon looked like a smile. He had given the necklace to Martyna when they were young. She used to love anything celestial. He never noticed it on her... If it had the letters on the back, it was hers. He turned it over, and there they were. He had to squint to see the inscription because they were so worn– NM. This was her necklace, and that asshole left it for Nevada to rub in his face.

 

 

“Did he leave anything with it?”

 

 

“No boss, just that.” He dismissed him with a wave and the man picked up his friend and left. How he wished he had his old crew with him, they were like family. These new men…some of them had been with him for years and they still felt like strangers. It was just a job to them. “He’ll contact me, to gloat – he wouldn’t miss the opportunity.” He ran the necklace through his fingers as he paced around his apartment. Sean was in his office talking to Maria and filling her in. She wanted to come but both felt it would be to dangerous, and Sean said he’ll keep her posted and to keep her phone close. ‘He had been planning this for a while’ Nevada thought ‘He knew exactly where she would be…’ Nevada never shared personal information with his men, so how did he know? He walked around rubbing the stubble on his cheeks, then stopped dead in the kitchen. All the blood in his body rushed to his face and his hands shook with a rage he held on too just for that little fuck who took her. “ _Son of a bitch!”_ He ran to the door and flung it open, shouting at the top of his lungs for his men to get their shit together now and be ready in five minutes. Sean ran out of the office “What! Did you find her?” Nevada marched into the kitchen past Sean and grabbed two guns. Then jogged down the hall and disappeared into the bedroom. “Nevada! Did you find her! Answer me for fuck sake!” He came out and walked past him again before returning with a third gun. “Do not shoot this unless you have too. Do you know how to use it?” Sean looked at Nevada, and taking the gun cocked it and checked for bullets. He then shoved it in his waist band. By the way he just handled that gun Nevada knew this was not his first rodeo – a discussion for another time. All his men lined the hall, prepping their weapons and waiting for orders.

 

 

“Nevada – ‘’ He looked at Sean before cocking his third gun. “I know where she is.”

 

 

 

 

 


	30. Chapter 30

 

 

 

Martyna awoke tied to a chair, her wrists and ankles bound with plastic ties and her face injured and bloody. She could only see out of her left eye and her head throbbed. There were some men sitting around a small table she could see, but it was still somewhat blurry. She wasn’t in the same room... She had no idea where she was. The last thing she remembered was laying down on the cot. This place looked like a horror movie from the ‘80’s. The floors were old, cracked concrete that had turned a filthy black and green color, and there was wicker furniture that was falling apart on the ground in random places. Martyna noted the floor under her feet was clean, no blood. She guessed she hadn’t bled much, but she felt like she had been put through the ringer. She was too wrapped up in thought to realize the room had become silent. She looked up to the table and they were all staring at her. Fear gripped Martynas chest and she found it hard to breath. She wasn’t equipped to deal with this shit anymore, years of a normal life had made her soft. She felt panic rise up in her belly when a very large man began to make his way over to her.

 

 

“You – you awake?” He grabbed the back of her hair and snapped her neck back. Martyna cried out in pain. “Guess so” He let her hair go and plucked her cheeks between his fat fingers. “You know why you’re her bitch?” He looked her up and down, licking his lips. “You’re a nice piece of ass – for an old broad” The men at the table laughed and she spat at his feet “Oh, feisty…” He ran his hands down her blouse and over her breasts “I like my hoochies with a little fight in ‘em. I especially like them under me begging me to stop and I fuck ‘em anyway.” He ran his hand up Martynas leg and she squeezed them together as hard as she could, then spit in his face. “I bet you do fucker” Martyna belted out “It’s the only way an ugly cunt like you could get a nice piece of ass – pathetic!” She couldn’t believe she said that, she had no defence, she was tied up, what the hell was she doing…The man took a step back and his face turned red. His fist came up and he swung hard, but his arm was grabbed by a man wearing a suit that was significantly bigger then the man who was about to beat the shit out of her. The man in a suit twisted his arm until a large popping sound filled the air and he yelped in pain and stumbled back to the table. He took out a switch blade from his inner coat pocket, causing Martyna to recoil, but he just shook his head and cut loose the ties on her ankles and wrists. Standing up he cleared his throat and adjusted his tie.

 

 

“My employer wants to see you. Do you need assistance walking?” Martyna stared at him dumbly for a moment. She stood up slowly on shaky legs, then stepped out of the restraints. The man in the suit waited patently for her to get adjusted before extending his right arm out in front of him gracefully, her que to walk in that direction. She was so scared, meetings one on one _never_ went well; there was usually only one person that walked out.

 

 

As she walked toward the door all she wanted to do was cry. She thought about Nevada and wished he was there with her. He didn’t make this happen, she knew what she was stepping in the moment she returned to the Heights. She denied it all – her feelings, her surroundings, all of it. How could she have thought bringing Sean back would be so cut and dry – fly in, fly home. Really, what the hell did she think was going to happen. “…so stupid” she muttered, and wrapped her arms around herself, trying to keep out the dampness that seeped from the walls of this place.

 

 

She didn’t mean to throw it back in Nevada’s face, that wasn’t her intention at the apartment. She did need him, in all the ways he was blind too. Not the money, but a father to their son, a partner to her, or maybe… a husband. Her _one._ Someone to share the rest of her days… all those things that money can’t buy, but are of the highest priority, and the most important in life. This is what Martyna wanted most from him, it was the only thing she ever wanted from him. She began to think that maybe he wanted that too – hoped he wanted that. He just couldn’t keep his arrogant self out of his own way long enough to get his head out of his ass and admit it, or tell her. She wished with everything she had that he could. Martyna sobbed quietly, hugging herself while she walked. As she approached the door, she wondered if she would have the chance to see her son again, or Nevada.

 

 

Screams bellowed from behind the closed door, screams that made the men at the table cringe and recoil into themselves, as if they could escape from the noise that way.

 

 

Then, silence.

 

* * *

 

 

Nevada and Sean rode in the back of the Navigator with two of Nevada’s best men beside them. The SUV had bullet proof tempered glass and would probably be the safest thing between his son and the shit they were headed into. He could tell Sean was nervous by the way he fiddled with his hands in his lap. He also knew that he would most likely shoot at the first thing he saw, and he had to curb that impulse now. Full of anger and fear he could accidentally shoot the person holding his Mom. If they turned and used her as a shield for the bullets, he would end up shooting her – or worse. Sean would never be able to forgive himself if that happened, Nevada knew this. He looked over his son with sad eyes. He didn’t want this for him, and he doubted Martyna would ever forgive him. ‘Why…why now did those cocksuckers have to fuck this up… _WHY?_ ’ Nevada’s jaw clenched and his tightly controlled rage was balled up, waiting for just the right time to let go.

 

 

“Sean” He looked up “Stay behind me and the men when we get there. These two” He motioned to the men in the back “will be on you. The assholes that took your Mom will be waiting for you to do something impulsive – something stupid, so stay with the men. If they get to you, they’ll use you to get to you’re Mother, or me. None of which will turn out well for anyone. Don’t be a fucking hero, just do as your told.” Sean glared at him and ignored the reference. “Who took her?” He had to know. The question was still not answered and Sean was beginning to bubble with anger. His Mom did _nothing._ ‘It’s all my fault’ Sean stewed. What the fuck did he expect was going to happen? It’s not like his Mom sugar coated what went on here or what Nevada did for a living. Even if now it was real estate crime and not much drug crime – crime is crime. ‘But I still insisted on meeting him…what the fuck was I hoping to accomplish here?’ Sean ran his hands through his hair, he felt like he was in a movie.

 

 

Rubbing his eyes, he looked up to find Nevada staring at him “The fuck you lookin’ at? He met Nevada’s angry gaze full force. He couldn’t get over how much Sean reminded him of himself when he was younger. He was smarter, and quicker then he was in his youth, and Nevada smiled with pride, in spite of his rising temper. “Watch you’re mouth boy”. Nevada shot him a look and Sean bit his tongue. “One of my men is a traitor. This young fucker. It’s not your Mom they want, it’s me. Your Mom is leverage” Sean looked confused as hell “I don’t understand, I thought it was different…” Nevada nodded in agreement. “It is very much different then it was years ago, but everyone still has enemies. Back then the agreement we, the boss’s, decided on forbid the killing of rival bosses for their product or territory. In leu of this, meetings were held to settle disputes. This ensured money flowed from customers to us with out disruption, and ensured boss’s families and loved ones were kept out of the business, so they couldn’t be used as bargaining chips. The heads of all the boroughs had control over what went on in their own territory, and how they would conduct business and choose to handle their people. That was when having two Boss’s control and run all the territories ended, for the better. The _boss’s_ ended – the enemies persisted. They just conduct themselves differently - until now. These cunts have thrown us back twenty plus years.” Nevada leaned over to Sean, staring him dead in the face. “I will kill whoever took your Mother.” Sean had nothing else to say. He knew Nevada would. And he knew he wouldn’t do anything to stop him.

 

 

The back doors of the warehouse were left open and banged on the walls when the wind hit them. They were left open on purpose. Nevada’s men walked in slowly, guns pointed at arms length, moving back and forth in an attempt to see the slightest movement. After it was clear, Nevada and Sean came in behind the two largest men. Nevada looked around the empty warehouse and lowered his gun. It was lit up like a birthday cake, and whoever was here had left in a hurry. The chairs at the table were knocked over and smoke still rose from an overflowing ashtray that lay spilt and broke on the floor. His guts tightened and he could taste bile in his mouth. Something was wrong, he could feel it. Nevada motioned for Sean to stay back and he aimed his gun in front of him and began to walk cautiously through the junk on the ground. His men covered him from the sides and back and Sean was sandwiched between the two larger ones at the rear. Nevada stepped in something, his shoes squishing through it and he looked down. Crimson red liquid formed a grotesquely shaped puddle on the floor and he had to turn his face into the arm of his coat to stop from gagging. It could only belong to one person. ‘Jesus Christ…’ His mouth went dry and he struggled to swallow. “Get him out of here _\- now”_ his men took hold of Sean’s arms and he fought to free himself “Nevada what! What is it! Get the fuck off me.... _Nevada_!” His screams fell on deaf ears.

 

 

He made his way to the back of the warehouse. His gun still extended in front of his face, he shimmied from right to left, his men followed behind. “Stop!” Nevada cocked his head to listen. A small creaking noise came from behind one of the doors that lined the back wall. Some of the men shuffled their weight trying to hear, making it almost impossible to gauge what it was. “Any more noise comes from you cocksuckers and I’ll blow your fucking balls off myself -got it! Shut the fuck up!” He saw a light dim and brighten to the far left and he walked towards the door, putting his hand up to tell his men to stay put. He pointed his gun in the crack of the door and pushed it open. He looked down at the floor.

 

 

He couldn’t breath.

 

 

Martyna lay lifeless, her face turned downward on the concrete floor, her blood in pools around her and her clothes torn. Her hair was matted with blood and fifth and the slices they had made in her skin were deep and oozing. She was almost unrecognizable. Nevada ran to her and dropped to his knees.

 

 

“ _NO!…_ no, no, no, no, no…. please no…” What began as a scream in his mouth ended as a plea chocked out with the tears that fell down his face. Kneeling next to her he turned her over and picked Martyna up in his arms. Her head fell back, limp and lifeless, and her arms swung loosely around her still body. Nevada ran his hand gently over her face, touching every curve of her face and mumbling incoherently as her rocked her, and hugged her. “Please” he begged “Please come back to me…” He nuzzled his face in her bloodied hair and cried “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…. please…”

 

 

“Hurts - don’t it” A raspy, mucous filled, voice snickered from behind Nevada. A click and a snap of a gun prepping for use echoed in the silence of the room. “I know all about it Nevada. Hurt, pain, how it feels to lose someone you love…” He began to turn to see who was standing over him, but the cold metal of the guns barrel twisted his face back around. The man tsked “No, no asshole. You look when _I say_ you look – not before.” He walked around to the fallen chair and picked it up. Flipping it with the back side to the front, he straddled it and stared a with hate and rage in his eyes. Nevada was still holding Martyna on the floor, covered in blood and dirt. The man laughed, a conniving, resentful, cackle that rang through the whole warehouse. “Confused? Guess I would be too in your shoes.” He lit a cigarette and blew the smoke at Martynas body “Don’t. Fucking. Do. That.” Nevada was a tightly contained ball of pure hate and rage and he shook with the anticipation of torturing this man slowly until he bled out. “Oh no, no.. remember – you do what I say.” Nevada turned his gaze to the outside “Oh – looking for your crew?” Another laugh “Oh, I’m sorry, they’re dead. You didn’t really need them did you? Well I guess not now!” The man broke into a hysterical coughing giggle.

 

 

Sean. Nevada’s heart fell in his stomach. He still held Martyna tight.

 

 

“Now, you don’t know me, but I know you. Let me tell you a story” He positioned himself then continued “Once upon a time, about twenty-seven years ago there was little boy in the back of his father’s warehouse. A fucking cunt came in and killed his father as the little boy watched and it fucked him up so bad in the head that for the _REST OF HIS LIFE HE COULD NOT FUNCTION AS A NORMAL PERSON!”_ The barrel came down hard on the side of Nevada’s face and the impact sent him flying to the side, Martyna’s body hitting the floor. “ _YOU REMEMBER NOW! THAT WAS MY FATHER!”_ The man kicked Nevada in the face and cracked his nose. Grabbing it, he stared at the man. “You killed him and emptied the safe – that was all we had, for a life time _– that was all we had_!” Another shot to the face, this time with his fist. He fell over on Martyna, then picked her up, holding her again. The man went on a rage, screaming and punching the walls and doors.

 

 

Nevada’s eyes suddenly popped open as he realized who this man was. He was the kid of one of the bosses he killed years ago trying to set up on his territory. He remembered questioning noises when his crew was finished “cleaning up”, as they used to call it, but for whatever reason he never pursued it. He had forgotten for years…clearly he was the only one.

 

 

The gun that was now pointed at his head was held steady. Nevada knew the time had come, and this man would pull the trigger. If he were bluffing, his hand would be shaking. It wasn’t. ‘With age comes wisdom’. Martyna’s father used to say that, and it would bug the fuck out of him every time. But now, as his end was near, he understood what it meant. He understood that life is fleeting, and the time spent with people better God damn well be the right people – that you hold on to the ones you love and never let go. He knew he didn’t want to be without them again, he didn’t want to live without them, and he would never let them go this time. A peace came over him, knowing that he would soon be with them on the other side.

 

 

Martyna and Sean. His family.

 

 

He closed his eyes as the bullets peppered the room.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	31. Chapter 31

 

 

Nevada’s body lay over Martynas on the blood stained floor. He was crouched over her in a protective huddle, his arms still around her. Chips in the cinder block walls from the on slot of bullets left cement dust that covered their bodies and hung in the air like a thick smog. They looked like they had been mummified in ash. Blood and flesh were smeared on the walls and it smelled like death. The echoing of shots fired still resonated through out the room, and for a brief moment there was complete silence. A stirring in the ashes caused plumes of dust upward. The man that had his gun pointed at Nevada’s head didn’t have the opportunity to kill him; Sean took it away from him when he kicked open the door and fired three perfectly aimed shots into the mans temples, blowing the right side of his face off. The men that were still alive on Nevada’s crew took care what was left of the others.

 

 

“ _MOM!_ Mom…” Sean stumbled over and dropped to the floor, coughing as he grabbed at the forms on the floor. “Nevada…” He shook him and there was movement. “Get him up. Put him in the car – make sure no one fuckin’ sees you doing it, we don’t have a lot of time.” Sean instructed one of his men then turned to the other standing by the door “Can your doc deal with this? The man nodded. “Good. Take him there. Make sure he’s there waiting when you arrive” His man was unsure if he should take orders from Sean, but a cold, dark look shot in his direction changed his mind.

 

 

“Mom – come on Mom” Sean held Martyna chest to his ear and heard nothing. He laid her down flat and blew the dust off her face. He could tell she had been beaten by all the dried blood that circled the now coagulated wounds and he bubbled with anger. He placed his fingers on her wrist and neck, trying desperately to feel a pulse. “Come on Mom, don’t do this…” Again, he placed his head on her chest, and listened. The tiniest, faintest thud came from there, and Sean snatched his Mom up and held her, his eyes teared as he picked her up. Her limp body hung over his arms as he carried her out, moving quickly, trying to avoid the junk on the floor. He gently laid Martyna down in the back seat of the Navigator and hailed two men to stay with her. “Keep you’re fingers here” He pointed to the pulse point on the wrist. “Don’t talk. Listen. Keep her head elevated, I’ll be back.” Sean ran back in the warehouse into the room his Mom and Nevada were held. “Come on _FUCK -_ where the hell is it!” He threw over the chair and it crashed into the wall. With all the dust it was impossible to see shapes on the floor. “Fuck!” He turned to head for the door and kicked something that slid into a corner. He ran over and picked it up. It was Nevada’s gun, he was sure of it. There were deep gouges in the handle, he noticed them in the SUV when it was laying between them. Sean grabbed it and turned to run out…

 

 

A loud bang ripped through the room and Sean was propelled back by a bullet that hit him in the side of the arm, ripping deep layers of skin from above his elbow. He hit the floor hard and before he could move, a man jumped him, his fist punching his face multiple times before he was able to push him off. Blood gushed from his cheek and he fought to stand. The man came at him again and Sean kicked the side of his knee and it buckled, sending him down on the concrete. Both were coughing from all the dust in the air. The man sat up and began to drag himself across the floor, trying to reach Nevada’s gun that Sean dropped after being hit. Sean grabbed the mans hair and smashed his face of the floor, blood sprayed from his nose and he pointed the gun and fired, missing Sean’s head by millimeters. They struggled for the gun, both still crouched on the floor. The man was suddenly lifted up, his arms held at length while someone picked Sean up off the floor. The dust was in his eyes and they wouldn’t stop watering, making it hard to see without a blurry undertone. Nevada’s men pulled him up, and held the other man down.

 

 

“Are you gonna finish it, or should we?” One of the larger men holding the asshole looked at Sean rather non chalantly, like killing people was something he did before breakfast.. He took a deep breath and coughed out dust. Looking the guy over as he was held there, there was a hint of recognition, he had seen him before. A light bulb moment and he remembered where he had seen that face. Posters strewn across town, stapled to poles, trees and construction fencing. This piece of shit was wanted in connection with multiple sexual assaults – some on young girls, but the police could never nail him down. Sean pondered the out come of different things he could do to torture this waste of a human being, but they had to get out of there – _now_ , it was a miracle the cops hadn’t already shown up. Sean stared at him, then a smirk appeared on his face “Perfect” he said, and knocked the man unconscious with a hard blow to the side of his head, using the hand that held Nevada’s gun. “Bring him” The men nodded and dragged him out.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Martyna lay in the hospital bed, for the second time since coming back to Washington Heights, battered and bruised. She had a ton of stiches on her legs and torso and they throbbed – she hated the feeling. Adjusting herself to an upright position, she opened one of the containers Maria left for her. The smell was heavenly and she ate with gusto, scrapping the sides of the Tupperware. She had to resist the urge to lick it in case someone came in. Maria was there when she woke up and Martyna began panicking instantly, asking where Sean was and crying uncontrollably. Snorting and gasping for breaths, she didn’t know if something had happened to him. Marie consoled her friend, ensuring Martyna that Sean was not only ok, but made it out with minimal injuries. Nevada did not. Although he was recovering well, the hit he took to the side of his head with the barrel scratched his pupil, tearing small, microscopic hole along the surface. Had he gone to a real doctor instead of the his in house doc, his sight may have been saved. The doctor told him that even with the surgery, the damage may be permanent.

 

 

She thought of Nevada and cried. Not because of regrets, or anger. She cried because she was just fed up. She cried because of the wasted years. She cried because she was head over heels in love with him, and she couldn’t stay here with him. It was just too much shit to handle, and she absolutely would not subject Sean to anymore then he had already been exposed too. It was just too fucking much here now. Martyna wanted nothing more then to spend the rest of her life with Nevada, but she just couldn’t see how that was going to happen. She wished that this one time, her and Nevada could just make it work, with all the shit between them and around them. She cried quietly in defeat, knowing that wasn’t going to happen.

 

 

There was a knock at the door and Martyna quickly wiped the tears from her face with her arm, trying to fix herself up as best she could without the aid of a mirror. Before she could say anything, the door opened, and Nevada walked into the room with a bouquet of purple Iris’. And his head down. He looked up at Martyna laying in the hospital bed and knew that this shit had to end. Now. This was the second time she ended up in the hospital because of him, because of who he was, and what he was. Hurt and beaten. He thanked God it wasn’t worse, but it could have easily gone that way, and he couldn’t take anymore chances with her. He stared in her eyes and she fell apart, sobbing with her hands over her face. He walked over to her and sat down on the bed. Martyna wrapped her arms around his neck and held him so tight he was having trouble breathing. She let go and her hands went to his face, touching him all over. She ran her fingers over the eye patch and looked at him, wanting to ask. He smiled and took both her hands in his.

 

 

“It doesn’t hurt, feels like there’s sand in it.” His voice was soft, but horse. “Are you…”

 

 

“Yes, I’m ok. Everything is healing well I’m told, and the cuts didn’t hit anything major – which is good.” Martyna looked at him again, running her hands over his face and arms.

 

 

“You have to go Martyna.” Nevada took her hands off his face and placed them in her lap. It broke her heart. “You have to leave here and get the fuck away from me. I’m no good for you – you deserve better… Sean deserves better. You will never be safe with me, you will always have to look over your shoulder…” Martyna’s eyes welled up and it felt like someone had just blown a hole in her stomach, but she knew what he was saying was true…” You will never have freedom to do anything. I sealed my fate, I accepted that years ago…years ago when you left.” He put his hands on her teary face as his own began to fall. “ _I can not loose you again_ – I will not.” She was sobbing openly and he felt his heart break in a million pieces. “I love you Martyna. I have always loved you. I would rather know you’re safe at home, then here with me. As much as I would love to spend the rest of my life with you...” His tears ran freely now and he didn’t give a shit. “I can’t.” Nevada got off the bed and turned to walk away, not saying another word to her. He couldn’t bare to see her like that, he couldn’t bare the feeling of emptiness that took over him. If he looked back, he knew he wouldn’t be able to leave. Rushing for the door Nevada bumped into the doctor that was coming in the room. He dropped his clip board and his pen went flying. He gave Nevada a stern look before returning to his notes. The doctor was blocking the door and all Nevada could think of was getting the fuck out of that room. He looked up unemotionally

 

 

“Are you her husband?” His guts knotted at the answer he had to give

 

 

“No” He clenched his fists until his knuckles were white.

 

 

“Ms. Kaczynski, I need to…” Martyna cut the doctor off

 

 

“He is with me, he’s…we are together.” She looked up at Nevada and reached her hand out for him. She prayed he didn’t just turn and walk away.

 

 

He stood there, trying not to feel what she was making him feel because he knew she had to go – he would make her go…how the fuck was she able to make him _feel_ things all the time. It was just fucking annoying. Although he knew he should walk away, he just couldn’t. Her words were music to his ears and he just couldn’t go, couldn’t let her go.

 

 

“Your together” It was a statement, not a question. “Fine, then you’ll want to hear this as well. Please, have a seat.”

 

 

As the doctor began to speak both Nevada and Martyna’s eyes went wide and their mouths dropped open, almost hitting the floor.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Sean and a few of Nevada’s men dragged the asshole from the truck of the unplated car, ensuring his head bounced off several different hard surfaces in the process, just for fun. They lugged him through the brush behind one of the walkways of Fort Tryon Park. Sean looked around for the perfect place to tie the fucker up, and it didn’t take him long to find it. Around the corner from where they parked the car, he saw a large iron fence that gated off a section of the park currently under construction. He turned to the men and they pushed him forward.

 

 

“Here! Bring him here.” The men brought the asshole over and Sean looked at him before tying him up. “You’re a fucking piece of shit. You hurt people that can’t defend themselves, because they’re not as strong as you, and you fucking get off on it!” Sean punched him in the face. “So now, everyone who walks by here will know exactly who you are and exactly what you did” He strolled over to the car and took out a large sign. He used plastic ties to attach it to the asshole.

 

 

**I am the piece of shit who assaults woman and young girls.**

 

Sean used the same ties to bound his wrists and ankles to the fence, so he was spread out, as if making a snow angel **.** Beside him he left a couple of baseball bats, just in case the people he assaulted would like to beat the snot out of him. Or, just anyone who thought he deserved what he dished out so liberally. He stood in front of the asshole, his face scared and angry. Before they left him, Sean looked him dead in the eyes and spoke with conviction.

 

 

“An eye for an eye motherfucker”

 

 

They drove off quietly as the people began to walked in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	32. Chapter 32

 

 

 

Martyna and Nevada stared dumbly at the doctor as he spoke. What he was saying seemed impossible, amazing, and utterly terrifying all at the same time. The doctor said it was a rare occurrence, and he himself had only come across it once before in his entire practice. She looked at Nevada and sighed out a smile. He squeezed her hand and stared at her. He couldn’t get over after all these years, she was still the most stunning woman he had ever seen…now more then ever. He had been smiling the entire time the doctor was speaking, and Martyna was unclear as to how much of what he said Nevada picked up. Placing some hair behind her ear, Nevada placed his hand on her belly, and kissed her cheek.

 

 

She was pregnant.

 

 

He couldn’t believe it. Martyna, his woman, the only woman he ever loved; carrying his child for the second time…what were the chances… after everything that happened. ‘This time’ he thought ‘I _will_ be a father to this child. She won’t have to run away to be safe. I got her.’ He knew in order to make this work, he had to let her go. They would work it out, make it work, by any means necessary. She was already supposed to be back home for an up coming conference, although her circumstances had obviously changed, Nevada figured she may as well stay there, safe and sound. If he had to fly out everyday for this family to work, then that’s what he would do. Period. There was _no way_ he was going to fuck up this opportunity this time, and there was no way in hell he would allow her to stay in New York with him. No more risks. No more chances.

 

 

He ran his hands all over her belly, wearing a shit eating grin from ear to ear. Pregnant with his child, and further along the doctor originally thought according to the ultrasound. Martyna was floored. She had an IUD, had it forever, she was in her 40’s, she had monthly cycles... The doctor said the bleeding and spotting were from the IUD pushing against the tissue as it grew to support the fetus. Unbelievable. It was totally unbelievable. If she woke up with her head stapled to the wall she would be less surprised then she was finding out she was pregnant. Never mind the fact her body was just put through hell. ‘How did this little one survive all that, oh my God’ she wondered in complete amazement. It was a miracle. Their own little miracle. Nevada just sat at the edge of the bed, smiling like a moron. Martyna couldn’t remember ever seeing him so happy. He just smiled and rubbed her belly and kissed her cheek.

 

 

The doctor spoke with them about tests they would preform to check on the health of the baby, and when her files would be transferred to her specialist back at home. The doctor said she should expect a call for her first appointment within a few days of being home. Martyna was instructed not to fly for at least two weeks, which was the last thing on her mind right now anyhow.

 

 

The doctor took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “I must say you two are extremely lucky – I hope both of you are aware of that. Considering the injuries you sustained, and your age, the IUD…” He shook his head in disbelief. “It truly is a miracle the baby is doing as well as it is.” Martyna looked at the doctor with tears in her eyes “If something is going to happen” she gulped back the sobbing she knew would begin any minute “When would it, do you think?” Tears poured down her face and Nevada held her close. “Its hard to say...the first week after any procedure is a delicate time. Any complications from the removal of the IUD would probably be within a week or so, however I can’t say with any accuracy. But there are more risk factors at play here. Right now, all I can tell you is that we have to wait and see. The best thing for you and baby right now is to rest.” His hard face softened “The nurse will be in shortly to take you to imaging.” Martyna looked at the doctor curiously “Yes” He grinned “More of those tests we just discussed. Try and get some rest”

 

 

“Are you hungry? I can get one of my men to pick us up something – anything you want. Lo que quieras, tendrás mi hermosa reina. (whatever you want, you will have my beautiful queen) Martyna rolled her eyes and smirked at him. She was hungry.

 

 

“How ‘bout Lox..” He cut her off

 

 

“How can you eat that shit all the time? What about a steak, or burger and fries..?” Nevada loathed the way that sandwich smelled, and hated the way it tasted even more. It reminded him of dead fish on the Hudson.

 

 

“I like it” She smiled at him, and he melted

 

 

“Ok, I’ll tell them to pick that shit up. I’m getting Prime Rib, fuck the sandwiches.” Martyna laughed. Of course he was. Actually, that sounded pretty good

 

 

“Make it two” He nodded and smiled, not looking up while he texted. She took a moment to stare at him. Martyna knew once she was home, she wouldn’t be coming back to New York for a very long time, and she knew he was aware of it. She wasn’t concerned at all. She knew they would work it out, she just _knew_ they would. It was a very comforting feeling. ‘Finally’ she thought.

 

 

She looked out the window, trying to take in all that was happening. She was scared. Scared of losing her baby, scared of being a new Mom in her 40’s, scared of the impact it would have on her career…. scared. Martyna tried to think how she could work all the angles of her new life with her old one. ‘Well, I can work from home a couple days a week, but I would still need someone to help with the baby.’ She contemplated for a moment ‘I suppose I’ll have to find a decent nanny. I don’t think it would be too hard to find a good one. I know some of the girls at work raved about theirs…I wouldn’t want a live in, I’ll raise my own kid thank you very much’ She thought ‘Just some help, especially when I have to work’ She knew she wouldn’t give up her job, she worked too hard to get where she was now. But Martyna knew she was very capable of doing both jobs, and it would get easier as her baby got older. A working Mom wasn’t anything new to her. She thought of Sean and grinned ear to ear. He would be so excited when he heard the news, and Martyna knew he would step up at any time and take over for her. She could just see him taking the baby out for walks, and girls swarming him. He could attract the opposite sex like a moth to the flame, much like his father…maybe she would walk the baby…

 

 

Nevada turned on the TV and the news crackled through the old speakers….” _Early yesterday morning Police received a call from one of the maintenance staff at Fort Tyron Park claiming there was a man bound with plastic ties to the construction fencing close to the bridge on the east side. When Police arrived they were surprised to find the man wanted in connection with multiple sexual assaults in the Washington Heights area. He himself had been assaulted with what looks like baseball bats. Police are asking anyone with information on who did this to please come forward or call the number on the bottom of the screen…”_ Martyna spat at the television “That cocksucker got exactly what he deserved. Good for whoever put him there. If I knew who it was I’d shake that persons hand!” She went on yelling at the TV. He loved her fire. But he wasn’t going to tell her who did it, she would lose her mind if she found out it was Sean, and that was the last thing she needed right now. He could keep that secret. She never needed to know anything Sean did to save the both of them. He only asked two things of Nevada: One – He never tell his Mother what happened. Two – He never ask him any questions about that night. He agreed, how could he not. A man has a right to his business. Besides, it was his son. How could he not grant these small requests after everything that happened. He gave his word. That was that.

 

 

Nevada didn’t have to work to hard to cover his tracks either. Whatever happened, he took care of what needed to be taken care of. The bodies in the warehouse were removed and the place was cleaned and scrubbed thoroughly by the contractors which specialized in this sort of “cleaning”. Whatever happened while Nevada and Martyna were half conscious in that warehouse, Sean would never be linked to anything that went down there. Ever. He smiled thinking of his son. He did what he had to do in the moment. But Nevada would make God damn sure that it was the first, and last time he ever had to be exposed to that life, for the rest of his life. Sean would go back home with Martyna, and pick up where he left off – before all this crazy shit.

 

* * *

 

 

Martyna sat at her favorite spot at the bay window in her living room. It felt so good to be home. She sipped her tea, staring at the vacant lot across the street. A large white sign had been hammered in the ditch that read in large letters “PUBLIC NOTICE” with writing underneath. ‘Great’ she thought ‘Wonder what they want to put there that will ruin my serenity’ She grinned and stared down at her belly, which currently looked like she had swallowed a basketball. Martyna rubbed it happily, pulling the elastic of her maternity jeans down so she could stare at her growing tummy.

 

 

She couldn’t wait for Nevada to arrive, she was beyond excited. Although they agreed not to find out the sex of the baby, she just couldn’t help herself – the anticipation was killing her. Martyna didn’t think Nevada would be angry at all, quite the contrary, she thought he would be ecstatic. After all the tests, and all the stress, and all the tears, _this_ was worth waiting for. Their child was doing great. She still couldn’t believe it. After all the shit, their baby was ok. Holy fuck, what a break.

 

 

Her phoned dinged and buzzed several times from the kitchen and Martyna rolled off the large ottoman to get herself up. She picked it up and put it right back down. She was amazed at how many people ignored the out of office reply and just kept going with whatever issues they felt couldn’t wait. She sighed and boiled the kettle again, and waited for Nevada to arrive.

 

 

The sound of a door slamming hard startled Martyna and she jumped, spilling her tea and dropping her book. “Fuck” she whispered, trying to bend sideways to pick up her cup with no success.

 

 

“Nevada?”

 

 

“Martyna what the fuck is with all the bugs here! I’m getting eaten alive…fuckin’ things could carry me away” He walked into the living room and broke out laughing. Martyna was bent sideways on the ottoman with one hand on the floor and one hand on a planter, trying desperately to pull herself up from between the ottoman and the recliner. He was laughing so hard tears were trickling down his face. “Martyna what the hell are you doing?”

 

 

“Wanna give me a hand asshole!” She spat at him. He ran over to her and helped her up. He took her face in his hands and brushed her hair from her eyes. She glared at him before breaking out laughing. He joined her as he caressed her smooth face. “What were you doing?” He smiled at her. "I was trying to get my mug" She huffed and straightened herself up and looked down for a moment before she spoke. “I need you to close your eyes while I walk you to the kitchen” Nevada furrowed his brows and cocked his head “Why?” He didn’t like the lack of control. “Relax” She flicked his lips with her tongue and placed soft kisses on his mouth and he felt the bulge in his jeans grow. She grabbed him and rubbed him as they kissed and he moaned into her mouth. She had to stop now or the surprise she had for him would fall to the wayside while they fucked in the bathroom.

 

 

“Come with me” Her voice was horse and breathy and all Nevada wanted to do was take her right there. “Close your eyes – no peeking.” Martyna led him into the kitchen and stood him in front of the kitchen table. “Sit down” He sat at the table and could smell wax burning from candles, he also smelled something sweet, like cake or cookies. He heard Martyna sit next to him. “Ok, open your eyes” He opened his eyes to find the table covered with candles and a large box in the middle addressed to him, from Martyna. He looked at her confused.

 

 

“I’m sorry. I just couldn’t help myself” She grinned at him and shifted in her seat. “Open it Nevada”. He reached across the table and slid the box in front of him. Looking at her one last time, he opened it. Martyna watched the different facial expressions play across his face as his brain pieced together what she wanted him to know. On top of the cake with pink icing, there was a pair of tiny pink socks, tiny pink shoes, and a 3-D ultrasound photo that read: **_Hi Daddy!_**   Nevada was motionless. He just stared at the cake in front of him for what Martyna felt was an hour. “Nevada?” She spoke softly “Nevada are you ok? I just had to know I couldn’t…” He jumped out of his seat causing it to drop on the floor. He grabbed Martynas chair and turned her around to face him. He fell to his knees and lifted her shirt, kissing her belly all over, mumbling things in Spanish and English she couldn’t make out if she tried. Nevada hugged her tummy, and talked to it, kissing it more. She placed her fingers in his hair and ran them through as he kissed her. Tears fell down her face and she sighed and smiled and felt complete. Complete with him. He looked up at her, at her beautiful face. “I’m going to have a daughter, my daughter” She looked down at him hugging her belly “Yes Nevada, your daughter” He kissed Martyna and she wiped away his tears. He was finally fulfilled, in everyway.

 

 

Although they’re living arrangements were anything but traditional given the circumstances, this was his family. _His_. At almost 50 years of age, he finally got what he always wanted. And he realized he had to grow with this many years behind him to really understand that at the end of the day, nothing can compare with what money can’t buy.

 

 

‘With age comes wisdom’ Nevada thought ‘How right he was’

 

 

He kissed Martyna, and she smiled, holding him tight.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Thanks to all for the kudos! A special thanks to Kay, Terralynn, and J_Z for all the kind words and support, thank you very much! This was my first fic, and although difficult at times, it was a lot of fun to write. 
> 
> I remembered every time I was writing, editing or posting, I would either hear this song, or it would pop in my head - it became the unofficial theme song to the story for me :) So I wanted to share it...
> 
> Sit Next To Me by Foster the People. I think it matches perfectly :) 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the story! And thanks again for reading! Cheers :)


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